Who takes the helm?

[rotrax]

First Mate does almost all the helming. She has twice asked me to take over, both where my longer experience of heavy sea conditions has been needed. Once when turning back after we decided it was too severe and it needed a bit of nous to change direction 180 degrees by choosing a gap in the swell and the other time when entering Arklow in a heavy onshore blow - not reccomended!

The boat was surfing in the entrance, between high concrete walls. As the entrance turned, reflected waves had to be dealt with which required timing and strength.

Nasty, but coped with. Just after that we met dslittle of this forum and his lovely partner

I believe First Mate uses the same philosophy she used in her sidecar racing career when she was the handlebar attendant.

" If anyone is going to break my neck it is going to be me! "

Substitute 'scratch my boat' and you have it in one................................

 

[steve yates]

Also means if we hit anything or scratch the boat it aint my fault

 

[25931]

I mostly took the helm for close quarters manoeuvres into marinas locks etc. However she always helmed if we were picking up a mooring or anchoring, especially when picking up a mooring, it just seemed sensible that the one with the longer and stronger arms did the work at the sharp end. She was always brilliant at getting us into just the right spot, if the pickup failed it was always down to me.
When we switched to a twin screw motor boat she was not so keen and we used a system that picked up the buoy alongside the cockpit aft which did not need long arms and I did the business of getting the buoy in the right place. When anchoring though she helmed so that I could handle the anchor and chain.
All now history as we have just sold our boat, transfer tomorrow hopefully. Sad to no longer be boat owners after 45 years or so, but Anno Domini and all that.

Sad not to be a boat owner. Perhaps I have a few more years than you (90) am a widower, have sold the raggie but still enjoy my little stinkpot.

 

[Biggles Wader]

None of the above!

I sail with my sons!

The career deck officer likes to take the helm but allowance must be made for his tendency to issue the orders as if addressing the berthing party on a 40,000 tonner, eg “single up forward” means “leave a doubled warp ready to slip”!?

How does he manage without tugs?

 

[zoidberg]

The career deck officer likes to take the helm but allowance must be made for his tendency to issue the orders as if addressing the berthing party on a 40,000 tonner, eg “single up forward” means “leave a doubled warp ready to slip”!?

Does he make little 'Whoop - whoop - whoop' noises when engaging astern....?

 

[SaltyC]

Hmmmmm, SWMBO was happy to take the helm berthing in Marinas in a 31' tiller steered yacht (& V Good at it), a number of 'discussions'picking up buoys, if I lifted an arm - do you mean push the helm that way or the buoy is that way!!! Solution, buy a bigger boat with a wheel, no further confusion.

Result - she will no longer do either! So I either sail single handed, or single handed with wife.

 

[PlanB]

It always strikes me as odd that the activity involving most strength/effort (lines) is usually done by the physically weaker half of a couple.

 

[john_morris_uk]

Mrs M usually drives when we are anchoring. I usually drive in marinas as she is nervous (unnecessarily so) of crashing into another boat. I tell her I can do that by myself...

 

[Clancy Moped]

Mrs M usually drives when we are anchoring. I usually drive in marinas as she is nervous (unnecessarily so) of crashing into another boat. I tell her I can do that by myself...

+1

 

[penfold]

What? And deprive myself of the experience of pleasure and self-satisfaction that comes from learning of or witnessing your troubles, failures, or humiliation. If only the Germans had a word for it?

As Dubya might say "The problem with the germans is that they don't have even a word for schadenfreude".

It always strikes me as odd that the activity involving most strength/effort (lines) is usually done by the physically weaker half of a couple.

If they need to use significant strength they(and/or the helm) are doing it wrong.

 

[Laysula]

Her in charge has the helm. She is very comfortable berthing in marinas or bringing the boat up to a mooring buoy. On the other hand I'm more agile and comfortable stepping off and making fast.

 

[Sybarite]

Just after that we met dslittle of this forum and his lovely partner
..

We had that pleasure in S. Brittany.

My first recollection of Arklow was rafting up to a fishing boat and going for dinner. When we got back there were 6 boats rafted up outside us.

In the morning there was raft of 7 boats floating in the middle of the harbour, but no fishing boat.

 

[dslittle]

We had that pleasure in S. Brittany.

Ahhh. Stop it… ?

 

[Stemar]

It always strikes me as odd that the activity involving most strength/effort (lines) is usually done by the physically weaker half of a couple.

In our case, it's always been because the Admiral lacked confidence in our little boat, whose engine had a tendency to stall if you went from more than half throttle to idle too quickly - a bit awkward when the tide really doesn't think you should be going that side of the pontoon, I rather think that, next year, I'll get her to drive more, so I can do the fishing for pickup lines and leaping onto pontoons bit. (Poetic licence - I'm far too much of a coward for death or glory stuff coming alongside )

 

[ashtead]

It can be a challenge when moving up to a larger boat -what works fine in terms of berthing on a10.8 m doesn’t seem so easy sometimes at 12.8 m due to extra weight etc even with a bow thruster. We tend to sail on longer trips with daughter and SIL but for the home circuit we just take things more slowly on berthing if a couple and try to think through what might go wrong and be well fendered up. The biggest challenge is arriving on a short pontoon as found in some sub standard foreign marina without actual cleats but just loops etc -most berthing challenges seem to occur in unfamiliar ports where the space is to narrow or to short etc. I always tend to helm in and we use mid ship cleat when sailing as a couple provided berth is set up properly . My concern always tends to be hitting bow on entry due to poor visibility when sailing as a couple without a bow person even with fendering so can be overly cautious I’m told by crew .

 

[oldmanofthehills]

The only time I get my hands on the helm of my own boat is when parking it. My wife does almost all the helming as she is happiest there, like others above she also does the driving when anchoring/weighing anchor or picking up a mooring and I do the chain handling (no windlass). She does sometimes park the boat in marinas but only if the winds are not strong. Unless its blowing a hooley I offer her the option every time on locking in and she decides if she wants to park or not. Similarly my only chance of getting the helm at sea is if it is blowing a hooley. So I voted "take in turns" as seems broadly representative.

The Navigator nervous in marinas as she is worried about damaging other boats and our boat has an inadequate rudder and being a long keeler is erratic going astern - I was taught 'engine blast" turns so less bothered by the crafts limitation though I did demolish a pontoon hose reel once. On the other hand she is less nimble than me in hopping off boat to secure lines so I often wish she did the steering at the approach as I am much more worried about losing a wife overboard than I am about scuffing glass fibre.

She mostly takes the helm at sea while I fix things, make tea etc. I get called to the helm in twisting waves or challenging narrow passages

 

[rotrax]

I might be teaching Granny here, but some benifit might be derived by some from the following tip.

When picking up a mooring buoy I go to the bow with the extended boathook - we have high freeboard - and hold it out sideways so it is vertical and can be seen clearly by the helm.

As we approach, I signal with said boathook by leaning it to Port or Starboard, FM steers in the direction indicated. Subtle or large changes reflected by amount of lean.

Often we are approaching dead in the water, wind or tide stopping forward progress - FM prefers a steady approach - so I lean the boathook forwards, telling FM to move up to the buoy. A return to vertical means OK now.

When she sees me dissapear from view she knows I am attempting a pickup and she stops forward progress.

We are successful with a first time pickup about 95% of the time.

No shouting, no stress by either party and it soon becomes a well rehearsed technique.

We failed 3 attempts at a tricky buoy in St Mawes, 40 knot wind and a sharp swell, and once in Fowey, too much tide. A different approach angle fixed that one.

Otherwise last season's buoy pickups were great!

 

[rotrax]

We had that pleasure in S. Brittany.

My first recollection of Arklow was rafting up to a fishing boat and going for dinner. When we got back there were 6 boats rafted up outside us.

In the morning there was raft of 7 boats floating in the middle of the harbour, but no fishing boat.

The fishing Harbour is a shadow of its former self, the boat building and repair almost gone.

The town has put in some nice pontoons and a shower could be had at the Lifeboat Station.

Pretty good for the then cost of 10 Euro's a night!

Not so convenient for the supermatkets and shopping mall, wrong side of the River, but handy for the town.

 

[oldmanofthehills]

I might be teaching Granny here, but some benifit might be derived by some from the following tip.

When picking up a mooring buoy I go to the bow with the extended boathook - we have high freeboard - and hold it out sideways so it is vertical and can be seen clearly by the helm.

As we approach, I signal with said boathook by leaning it to Port or Starboard, FM steers in the direction indicated. Subtle or large changes reflected by amount of lean.

Often we are approaching dead in the water, wind or tide stopping forward progress - FM prefers a steady approach - so I lean the boathook forwards, telling FM to move up to the buoy. A return to vertical means OK now.

When she sees me dissapear from view she knows I am attempting a pickup and she stops forward progress.

We are successful with a first time pickup about 95% of the time.

No shouting, no stress by either party and it soon becomes a well rehearsed technique.

We failed 3 attempts at a tricky buoy in St Mawes, 40 knot wind and a sharp swell, and once in Fowey, too much tide. A different approach angle fixed that one.

Otherwise last season's buoy pickups were great!

good suggestion there about signalling - I will suggest to Navigator.

I pick up buoys as except in easy conditions with no contrary tide or wind as the Navigator often cannot pull loops or pickup aboard so I must leave the throttle to grab the boat hook from her to get the thing tied on before she loses grip.

We have a grab hooks that locks onto top of heavy buoys that dont duck out of the way but she finds that hard to use and the simpler one means I have to get in dinghy and pass rope end back to deck. I have applied for less exposed mooring so might be easier at least in our own waters

 

[blush2]

Himself helms onto pontoons and I jump around with the lines. As I am a shorty, mentioned in a previous post, I can't see the pontoon from the cockpit. The only times I have put Blush alongside I had taken an all girl crew racing. The second day it was gusting best part of 30 knots off the pontoon but with three line handlers and someone on the bow to tell me when to turn at the last moment we made it.

I pick up mooring bouys, I use the boathook signalling technique as well. This season we've bought one of those hook things. It works quite well.

For anchoring I helm and he drops the anchor. We agree roughly where it will be before we start. Fine tuning is with hand signals.

I think familiarity with what you are doing helps, and no shouting. Blush is 40foot on a tiller, but we have been sailing her for 19 years.