Writing a good advert - what's the secret ?

[Mike_S]

Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Sadly the time has come to sell our Regal 2150, we've got an impending overseas move with work and I can't persuade work to ship it out for us (to Sydney, Oztralia) and I'm gutted, it would be perfect for here /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif

I know it's going to be a challenge to shift in the current market, especially when looking around on the likes of boatsandoutboards & apolloduck they're available from anything between £11-17k, which is why I'd like to garner advice on how to word the adverts and where to put them. I've got loads of photos both outside & inside taken when it's been sunny(!) so should be able to display it well enough on the interweb.

This is my first stab at the ad and it looks a bit 'wordy' to me, please all help / critique is welcomed.

Regal 2150 LSC, Year 2000 UK model.

Powered by Mercruiser 5 litre V8 EFi, 240hp on Alpha 1 leg with 3 blade S/S prop. Green / white combination with 2 berth V-cabin, comfortable for overnight stays. Approx 200 hrs from new, recent antifoul and full engine / leg service carried out ready for the season. Kept in freshwater marina for last 2 years or on trailer (twin axle SBS roller trailer). All original handbooks from UK dealer and receipts. SSR registered as Whi-Ski-N-Water.
Comes with full camper canvas re-proofed last year and full tonneau.
Fitted with standard instrumentation of speedo, rev counter, oil & water temperature, depth gauge, trim, fuel, voltmeter, compass, navlights & stereo along with Raymarine VHF & Lowrance LMS525C colour chartplotter.
Auto & manual bilge pumps, portaloo, anchor & all fenders, coastal flare pack, ski rope, in fact everything needed to go out on the water.
In excellent condition both inside & out with a survey done 2 years ago when we bought it. Very clean cabin & interior, all carpeted with sink, cupboard, table, reversible helm seat and infill seat to create full sunpad. Drop down swim ladder.
Extremely fast boat with the Regal Fastrac hull design giving GPS speeds of 50+mph yet also a capable and economical cruising / sports boat with 140+ mile range at 25-30 knts. Much loved boat only for sale due to impending overseas move and we can’t take her with us. Possible delivery if costs are covered. Located in Cardiff, South Wales.

I'm writing this from Sydney (where it's raining for gods sake!) so please excuse me if I don't reply during the day !!

Thanks all

Mike

 

[longjohnsilver]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Description looks fine, you could maybe take a few word out but almost all is detail I'd be looking for as a prospective purchaser. What really sells it is the photos and price. Lots of good photos and a competetive price should do the trick.

Good luck. We were only looking at our Sydney photos just a few hours ago. I loved the place. The thought of Doyles restaurant has me salivating...............

 

[Mike_S]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Thanks, I'm looking at taking a few of the words out to be fair, without taking too much away from it. I remember when we were looking for a boat wanting to see as much info as possible, which I think is important given that it's a good 1st boat

Doyles eh ? I was there last week...Needed a fish 'n' chip fix /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[maybh1]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

From a female perspective - you need as many photos as possible and make sure the curtains and cushions are straight /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif and the inside shots don't show clutter and dangling wires from kettles etc.

Remember its not just the males you are aiming your advert at - us ladies usually have the last word /forums/images/graemlins/ooo.gif and if the boat looks well presented its half the battle.

May
xx

 

[Mike_S]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

May, you're not wrong, it was SWMBO who decided we were having this boat originally. All I was concerned about was that it was the only 2150 I'd seen with the V8 option, rather than the V6 they all seemed to be fitted with. She went through the rest of it with a fine tooth comb and loved the layout / condition, so we bought it.

I've left most of the photo taking to her as well seeing as how I'm on the other side of the world, so it's all very clean & tidy in the photos. The only dodgy one shows the dog sat in the cuddy with her lifejacket on !

 

[Poignard]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Don't forget to add:

"NO TIME WASTERS".

/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[ontheplane]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Don't take anything out.

I have sold several things on eBay recently and I usually get a far better price than most for the same thing simply because I go into so much detail....

e.g. - my fathers car:- 1998 on an R-plate sold for £1000 within 30 minutes of the ad going live because I listed every single job ever done on it, full details of the car, good photos, and more importantly, it sounded like the car was LOVED....

People hate to think something is a dog... so if you can tell them everything about it they get to think the item is loved and cared for - ie will be in good condition. Also I have found a little trick - always mention the smallest defect and take a picture of it.... so for example lets say the boat is perfect apart from one tiny tiny mark on the hull from the trailer. If you show a pic of that, and mention it in great detail the potential buyer will see it and think, "crikey, most people wouldn't have mentioned that, if that's the worst thing about it then the rest must be pristine" - works well....

Good luck, and congratulations for managing to get a decent ad on the forum!! lol

How much are you asking?

 

[Coastgal]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Hi Mike - your description makes it look like a great boat. Having recently read through loads of ads with hubby, I found we skimmed through ads, looking for priority requirements, then took a longer look once we saw it met our key needs. So I've had a play with your ad to pull out the key things to make it easy to see just how much you're getting with the boat.

But we all read things differently, so other forumites might have a different view on this. So here goes:

Regal 2150 LSC, Year 2000 UK model.

This is a great boat - excellent condition both inside & out with a survey done 2 years ago when we bought it.

Colour & interior:
- Green / white combination with 2 berth V-cabin, comfortable for overnight stays.
- Very clean cabin & interior, all carpeted with sink, cupboard, table, reversible helm seat and infill seat to create full sunpad.

Engine & Hull:
- Powered by Mercruiser 5 litre V8 EFi, 240hp on Alpha 1 leg with 3 blade S/S prop, it’s an extremely fast boat with the Regal Fastrac hull design, giving GPS speeds of 50+mph, yet also a capable and economical cruising / sports boat with 140+ mile range at 25-30 knts.
- Approx 200 hrs from new, recent antifoul and full engine / leg service carried out ready for the season.
- Kept in freshwater marina for last 2 years or on trailer (twin axle SBS roller trailer).
- All original handbooks from UK dealer and receipts. SSR registered as Whi-Ski-N-Water.

Fully Equiped – everything you need to go out on the water.
- Comes with full camper canvas re-proofed last year and full tonneau.
- Fitted with standard instrumentation of speedo, rev counter, oil & water temperature, depth gauge, trim, fuel, voltmeter, compass, navlights & stereo along with Raymarine VHF & Lowrance LMS525C colour chartplotter.
- Auto & manual bilge pumps, portaloo, anchor & all fenders, coastal flare pack, ski rope, Drop down swim ladder.

Much loved boat only for sale due to impending overseas move and we can’t take her with us. Possible delivery if costs are covered. Located in Cardiff, South Wales.

NO TIME WASTERS.

 

[Chris_d]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

I'd agree with all the other comments, but at the end of the day you only need to get the right price and peeps will call. Too much and peeps won't ring thinking theres no way they can do a deal, too cheap and they won't bother because theres obviously a hitch or its not a prestine boat, do not set a dealer type price like 16999, if you want say £13K for it try £14500 and stick to it saying its a fair price for good boat etc.. pleed poverty, throw in delivery or something. Money is king after all, someone will always buy it for the right price.

 

[jfm]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Looks good to me. A few thoughts

1. Get lots of tidy pictures, with no junk or kettle leads as maybh says. And not with rectangular quilts hanging over the sides of rounds beds and other untidy things

2. Don't say "no time wasters" imho.

3. Take out the "delivery if you pay for it" as it makes you look a nickel and dimer. If I bought it and lived in say Southampton I'd (just for devilment) tell you I'll buy it if you pay for delivery, after all it isn't my fault that the sodding thing is in Wales. Get my point?

4. You aren't categoric on whether it comes with a trailer

Good luck

 

[photodog]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

I'll have a whack at a bit of subbing...

[ QUOTE ]

Regal 2150 LSC, Yr 2000, UK model.

Mercruiser 5 litre V8 EFi, 240hp with Alpha 1 leg and 3 blade S/S prop. Approx 200 hrs, antifouled, serviced, and ready to go.

Freshwater marina or trailor kept for past 2 years. All original documents and receipts.

Comes with full camper canvas tonneau. Green / white combination with 2 berth V-cabin.

Comprehensive standard instrumentation plus Raymarine VHF & Lowrance LMS525C colour chartplotter.

Auto & manual bilge pumps, portaloo, anchor, lines and fenders, coastal flare pack, ski rope, in fact everything needed to get out on the water!

Very tidy cabin & interior, all carpeted with sink, reversible helm seat and infill to create full sunpad. Drop down swim ladder.

Very quick boat with the Regal Fastrac hull design giving 50+knts, yet also a capable and economical cruiser with 140+ mile range at 25-30 knts.

In excellent condition both inside & out with a recent survey.

Much loved boat only for sale due to overseas move. A great weekender, ready to go now for the coming season.

Possible delivery. Located in Cardiff, South Wales.



[/ QUOTE ]

 

[David_Jersey]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

I'd also include some good photos of the engine. and add Service History or pref FSH. On the photo front also include at least one "living the dream" in sunny weather - pref with happy smiling folk onboard.

On the delivery front I would say "assistance possible with delivery".

But as already said, price is the key. Price it fairly from day one, without giving away - best way to find that figure out is to pretend you are buying one /forums/images/graemlins/ooo.gif. (and being in Cardiff I would factor in a couple of hundred quid to fill her up / chip in towards delivery costs / cover additional storage costs for a few weeks or so all to sweeten the deal).

 

[Mike_S]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Blimey !

Thanks very much for all the replies, I'll take it all 'onboard' so to speak (although it's pretty much re-written for me!) and get ready to put the advert up. I've got a ballpark idea of £11k for the price, looking about on t'interweb that seems to be the marker at which they sell privately, even if they are all V6's and ours is the V8. I'll make sure it says trailer included as well.

Cheers all, anything else is appreciated.

Mike

 

[maybh1]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Let us know how you get on with selling her. If you are sucessfull we may want a small commission /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

May
xx

 

[cliff]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

[ QUOTE ]
Sadly the time has come to sell our Regal 2150, we've got an impending overseas move with work and I can't persuade work to ship it out for us (to Sydney, Oztralia) and I'm gutted, it would be perfect for here

[/ QUOTE ]Plan "B" might be to ship it out yourself or at least see if the Co. will put something in the pot to assist your shipping costs.

Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity.

 

[Mike_S]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

I'm looking to them at the moment to see what assistance they'll give, there comes a point where you have to draw a line under the losses of selling quickly and put that money toward bringing stuff here. Shipping the house contents is included in my deal, possibly our cars should selling them prove to be an issue (try selling a Range Rover in the current climate "ahh yes, it's worth 50pence sir" ) but of course cars fit in a standard shipping container, so it's not a huge problem until they get here and have to get through Oz customs and ultimately registration, which is designed to make it difficult and not worth it.

I've not looked into the details of bringing a boat here, other than I know I'd have to get an Australian trailer for it on arrival, UK ones are illegal (still, I could sell the trailer and put a few quid toward a new one here). Of course that means it'll have to go as deck cargo and I'd guess that it'll be prohibitively expensive, even though it's only 22ft long. Oz customs would have a field day with cleaning it when it got here though to make sure it wasn't carrying anything dodgy into the country!

 

[tcm]

Re: Writing a good advert - what\'s the secret ?

Regal 2150 LSC, late/early* 2000 UK model.
Inboard Mercruiser 5 litre V8 EFi engine, 240hp on Alpha 1 leg with 3 blade S/S prop. 2 berth V-cabin. Approx 200 hrs from new, recent antifoul and full engine + leg service. Last 2yers in freshwater or ashore on twin axle SBS roller trailer (included/not included in price*). Original handbooks and receipts. Full tonneau and camper canvas, recently re-proofed. Reversible helm seat and infill seat to create full sunpad. Standard instruments plus Raymarine VHF & Lowrance LMS525C colour chartplotter. Interior all carpeted. Sink, cupboard, table, WC. Fastrac hull gives max 45+ knots, or economical 140mile range at 25-30 kts. Ready to go - includes anchor, swim ladder, fenders, coastal flare pack, ski rope. Much loved boat, only for sale due to impending overseas move. Possible delivery at extra cost. Located in Cardiff, South Wales.

*adjust if things are or aren't included. loadsa pix

 

[Mike_S]

And the winner was....

Well, a mix of Coastgal and myself actually.

Boat sold yesterday for the full asking price (!) of nearly £12k to a local buyer. Sold to the 2nd viewer who was to be fair the first serious viewer, number 1 was dreaming. Had plenty of emails when it first went up for sale wanting 25% off, but I knew I didn't need to bother with them.

Had our service place been able to get the new bellows needed during the service, it would've sold in just over a week, as it was it took a month before I could give the new owner the trial. In that time I must've had 30+ enquiries from the UK and overseas, 4 other serious buyers viewed and were were in the queue should the first one drop out.

Quite honestly, I've been stunned by the interest I've had, we were thinking it would be very hard to sell and we'd at least have the summer in it. As it was, we got about an hour on Friday and the sea trial yesterday. Ho hum /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif

Boat's even staying local, so local in fact that it's staying in our berth at the yacht club as the new owner's joined up, which is great /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

Recession ? What recession /forums/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

 

[lovezoo]

Re: And the winner was....

Congrats on having sold the boat successfully. Out of interest where did you advertise it? I have found ebay in the past good for generating leads, but not so good for generating serious ones.

 

[Mike_S]

Re: And the winner was....

2 websites generated the most interest (had it on 3). It was sold via the boatsandoutboards advert, had probably 25 or more enquiries from that one and all the viewings came from that advert, along with all the overseas enquiries (Spain x 2, Greece x 3, Turkey & Germany). Also had it on apolloduck where I had 12 enquiries and over 9000 views online. 2 of the apolloduck ones wanted to come see it if the buyer dropped out.

Boatshop24 was by far the worst, but then I didn't expect much as it's essentially the autotrader and you can't put many words in for the description, it's pretty rubbish actually. Think that had 2 enquiries so I should've heeded my first instincts and not bothered with it.

I didn't bother with fleabay, deciding to go it on my own and try advertising first. I also had 2 brokers call me up within the first week offering to sell it, both of whom assumed somewhat of an air of arrogance when I said no due to the level of interest I already had. Both said "ah yes, but have you actually had any viewings from all these interested leads, because that's what we'll offer more chance of". When I replied with a "yes, 3 thanks and the first one's already wanting it" they both got the hump. A somewhat strange response I thought. One of them called my wife (sells $200m worth of stuff per year as a job) and tried it on with her, she thought the response she got to be somewhat odd considering they were trying to sell their services to her !