Women Drivers (Helmspersons)

[Martin&Rene]

I have recently been watching the TV programmes about the canal trips by Timothy West and Prunella Scales. As is often seen in harbours, marinas and canals, we have the normal images of man stood nonchalantly on the boat and the woman jumping off the boat and running around doing all the hard jobs on shore.

When we first started to discuss buying a yacht, having been on a few flotilla holidays, I said to my wife, that she would have to do the berthing, whilst I, being taller, longer legged, longer arms, stronger and more prepared to jump (if necessary) would do the shore work. With a bit of trepidation we started off on this approach and after 5 years I am sure she is now more confident and more competent that I am at bringing our 34' yacht alongside.

So let's have a survey from those who regularly sail as male/female couples. Who does which job, why and do you sometimes switch roles?

Incidentally the best piece of berthing I have seen this year was when the Commodore's wife had to bring their 38' yacht into a finger pontoon berth in a marina, towing a 30' yacht alongside that had a failed engine.

 

[Eyore]

Absolutely, wife on helm ,hubby on anchor and jumping ashore duties.

 

[fireball]

We did wife on helm for anchoring quite a bit, but not usually on the pontoon berthing. She was quite capable, but it was about the only time I got to helm the boat!

After we first got our last boat I went to go alongside the fuel pontoon - issued the command "jump" only to be told to bring it in properly
I won't say I got it right thereafter because I didn't - but generally I aimed to bring it in so there was no "jumping" involved - we always got the boat tied up though so it must've generally worked. It took us a while to work out how to effectively use the boathook to get the first line on - but once we'd got the hang of that (I won't say master, because we could've pretty much always done it better) it made life a lot easier. Even with others onboard we didn't change the way we berthed...

 

[Scotty_Tradewind]

Mrs S. loves to pick up a buoy..... but seems to blame the skipper when it goes wrong????
You may have to scroll down to see and apologies for any pop-ups.......
http://s725.photobucket.com/user/johnscottorn/media/Gettintoknowyou.mp4.html?sort=6&o=15

 

[fireball]

Ah - so you get told to drive properly too

 

[Resolution]

Absolutely, wife on helm ,hubby on anchor and jumping ashore duties.

Cripes, you would be the odd one out in Sweden. In the Stockholm archipelago there is a great deal of mooring bows-to the rocks with a stern anchor out. Two years ago we spent all summer marvelling at the athleticism of the Swedish ladies jumping ashore with long lines to tie onto trees or rocks. Meanwhile all "Man" did was to hold the tiller and give commands.

 

[KellysEye]

Jane always drove our boat, it makes sense that the strongest person handles sails, anchor, jumping ashore. She did practice everything occasionally in case I got hurt.

 

[Stemar]

it makes sense that the strongest person handles sails, anchor, jumping ashore. She did practice everything occasionally in case I got hurt.

Completely agree, but the Admiral refuses to helm when picking up our mooring or coming alongside. She agrees that it makes far more sense, especially as she has limited mobility, but there's always a good reason why this isn't a good time to try

 

[Peroo]

SWMBO does drive, but prefers dropping and raising the anchor, picking up bouys (!?), raising and lowering mainsail, trimming genoa, jumping off to sort out mooring lines, lowering/raising outboard, assisting with the lowering and raising of the dinghy, hoisting me up the mast and, sleeping when sea sick.

As for me............

 

[mjcoon]

Cripes, you would be the odd one out in Sweden. In the Stockholm archipelago there is a great deal of mooring bows-to the rocks with a stern anchor out. Two years ago we spent all summer marvelling at the athleticism of the Swedish ladies jumping ashore with long lines to tie onto trees or rocks. Meanwhile all "Man" did was to hold the tiller and give commands.

Good grief; how far could they jump?

Mike.

 

[dunedin]

SWMBO helms virtually all the time, skipper hoists/trims/drops sails, navigates and provides hot chocolate at required intervals

 

[westhinder]

Mixed roles on our boat:
Berthing is usually me on the helm and my girlfriend stepping ashore, as she prefers. No jumping under any circumstances is our rule. Skipper has to manoeuvre so that no jumping is required.
Raising/dropping sails, anchoring, picking up moorings: she drives, I do the hard work.
Sailing we both like to helm for long spells and both enjoy just being on the boat and relaxing.
When the weather gets really bad, she prefers to helm. If anything needs to be done on deck in poor circumstances, I prefer to do that myself and have 100% confidence in her helming.
Sailing on a very broad reach or a dead run is always my job.
Mixed roles, as I said, but it has evolved that way over the past thirty years and it works for us. It is all about getting a situation that works for you.
It is our stated aim to improve her ability and confidence in helming in berthing situations. She is still getting to grips with the bigger boat in this respect.

 

[Tomahawk]

i drive and First Officer puts the rope over the cleat..

It is my job to ensure she does not have to do any jumping or leaping about. I have to get the boat to within a foot of where she wants it...

 

[Victoria Sponge]

I always helm when we pick up a buoy, anchor and berth. I'm not strong and I don't have long arms and legs, so it makes perfect sense for me to do the easy bit. I can never understand why some men appear surgically welded to the helm.

I also helm whilst he hoists the sails and spends hours trimming them.

 

[Tomahawk]

Helming and manourvering is a matter of confidence. I may get shouted at for this, but many females lack the self confidence to say, "I know I can do this" and carry it off.

Please note I am not saying all females, just a lot of them (you). I wonder if it is a result of education and social conditioning or genuine lack of spatial awareness. One is aware of the nokes about women drivers not being able to park a car. There is a grain of truth in them.

The issue becomes, how to address the lack of confidence and build up the self belief.

 

[martyn78]

My wife says it is simple:-
"Your Boat, You Berth It, all of it (not the boat but the process!!)"
Actually it is easier just to singlehand it then there are no arguments/shouting/falling out. The annoying bit is she is more than capable.

 

[Victoria Sponge]

If SWMBO lacks confidence then she should do Day Skipper without you being there. I did it with five blokes onboard and was treated equally by the instructor. When you've succeeded in bringing a 40ft yacht into a berth loads of times with five men watching, your confidence becomes unshakable. It's the realisation that it's not that difficult that hits you and if you do everything carefully, the worst you can do is nudge another boat or the pontoon with a well placed fender.

 

[Scotty_Tradewind]

thank goodness for women drivers!

Again ......You may have to scroll down to see and apologies for any pop-ups.......

http://s725.photobucket.com/user/jo...ntyreandBute_zps945d28c6.mp4.html?sort=6&o=28

 

[dancrane]

Mrs S. loves to pick up a buoy...

:biggrin-new:

Fortunately my SWMBO isn't so waywardly gregarious...the downside is, I might as well take a sack of coal or potatoes aboard for ballast, as ask her to help with the sailing.

 

[Victoria Sponge]

For some that is the real problem. If someone doesn't get boats and sailing you have a problem.