Wednesday Humour

[Forbsie]

A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby
to put his name on his mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady came
out of the apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe.
The lad smiled at the young woman and she started a conversation with
him.
As they talked,her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had
nothing else on.

The poor kid broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact. After a
few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said,"Let's go to my
apartment, I hear someone coming."

He followed her into her apartment; she closed the door and leaned
against it, allowing her robe to fall off completely. Now nude, she purred at
him, "What would you say is my best feature?" Flustered and embarrassed, he
finally squeaked, "It's got to be your ears!" Astounded, and a little
hurt she asked, "My ears? Look at these breasts; they are full and 100%
natural! I work out every day! My butt is firm and solid! Look at my skin-no
blemishes anywhere! How can you think that the best part of my body is my
ears?"

Clearing his throat, he stammered, "Outside, when you said you heard
someone coming?



That was me."


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[mtb]

Re:ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.nm

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[Forbsie]

If you liked that one....

Little 10-year-old Johnny goes for a long weekend with his uncle, a
wealthy farm owner. One evening, as Uncle John and his wife are
entertaining guests with cocktails, they are interrupted by
an out-of-breath Johnny who shouts out, "Uncle John! Come Quick!
The bull is f*cking the cow!"
Uncle John, highly embarrassed, takes young Johnny aside, and explains
that a certain amount of decorum is required. "You should have said,
'The bull is surprising the cow'- not some filth picked up in the playground,"
he says.
A few days later, Johnny comes in again as his aunt and uncle
are entertaining. "Uncle John! The bull is surprising the cows!" The adults
share a knowing grin. Uncle John says, "Thank you Johnny, but surely you meant
to say the cow, not cows. A bull cannot 'surprise' more than one cow at a time, you know..."
"Yes, he can!" replies his obstinate nephew.
"He's f*cking the horse!"


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[boatone]

Re: If you liked that one....

nice one Forbsie.....even made me laugh ! ! !

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[paulrossall]

Blair and Blunket were having a meeting in a room at No. 10 and Blunkets dog was there.

Person walks in and serves tea and on way out lifts dogs tail and looks under it, then walks out.

Another person walks in with some papers for them and on way out lifts dog's tail and looks under it.

Blair wonders what's going on and summonds aide to go and find out why dogs tail keeps getting lifted.

Aide returns and says

"someone has said there is a dog in this room with two arseholes!"

 

[mtb]

HHHAAAAAA HHHAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAHHHHH . nm

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I need a couple of oak tree's .. for me trawler

 

[mtb]

chuckle no more !..

.

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/boats
I need a couple of oak tree's .. for me trawler

 

[Forbsie]

You\'re easy to please, Mick.

Elderly Love

An elderly couple had been dating for some time.
Finally they decided it was time for marriage.
Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation
regarding how their marriage might work.
They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.
Finally the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of
their physical relationship.

"How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather trustingly.

Well," she says, responding very carefully, "I'd have to say I would like
it infrequently."

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment. Then, looking over his
glasses, he looked her in the eye casually asking,
"Was that one word or two?"


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[mtb]

Re: hhaaa ha ha hhhaaaa ha ha ..nm

.

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/boats
I need a couple of oak tree's .. for me trawler