capnsensible
Well-known member
Fenders are very cheap in England so please help yourself to a couple from nearby boats if you need them.
Misleading advice
- Thread starter johnalison
- Start date
capnsensible
Well-known member
No one minds if you take all your washing up to the showers to do, no matter how many nights you stay.
Sans Bateau
Well-known member
It is customary when returning to your boat late at night, when visiting a marina, to sit in the cockpit into the early hours with your crew signing whilst continuing to drink. If anyone can be encouraged to talk in a loud voice, this is seen as good manners. If one of your party can manage raucous laughter then you will always be welcome to return.
BlueSkyNick
Active member
All yachts in the Solent enjoy the big wash from power boats, especially when anchored in Osbourne Bay enjoying a quiet lunch.
They also feel very safe sailing across the MPZ when a large ship is leaving Southampton.
Finally, try to be in the vicinity of the entrance to the Hamble river at 1600 on a Sunday in July, to be entertained by all the vessels racing to get back in so their owners can sit on the motorway system for the remainder of the evening.
They also feel very safe sailing across the MPZ when a large ship is leaving Southampton.
Finally, try to be in the vicinity of the entrance to the Hamble river at 1600 on a Sunday in July, to be entertained by all the vessels racing to get back in so their owners can sit on the motorway system for the remainder of the evening.
MoodySabre
Well-known member
As we drive on the other side of the road we regard red and green buoys the other way round to you.
Oen
New member
Make sure you visit the Solent, where you will find the very best sailing the British Isles has to offer.
BrendanS
Well-known member
The UK has very strict laws on VHF usage, and it is essential you call the Coastguard for a radio check at least once per hour
whipper_snapper
New member
And in a similar vein.
When coming alongside another boat late at night, it is considered polite to alert them to your presence by jumping onto their decks from a considerable height, ideally while wearing heavy boots.
When coming alongside another boat late at night, it is considered polite to alert them to your presence by jumping onto their decks from a considerable height, ideally while wearing heavy boots.
Oen
New member
If a large vessel sounds her horn five times or more, it is an instruction to all smaller vessels to stand on their present courses, as it signals that the Master has planned his route through...
bbg
Active member
Enjoy the lovely weather.
Jonnysailboat
New member
Announce your arrival at each marina by pressing the red "arrival" button on your DSC radio and holding it down for 5 seconds...
Aja
Well-known member
On seeing a yacht motoring with its main up, and a cone - point down hoisted over the foredeck.
This is called a 'mirage'.
Donald
This is called a 'mirage'.
Donald
whipper_snapper
New member
Lubricating the heads with vegetable oil is a daily ritual on British yachts and is know as ‘cottaging’. A good way to make friends with a neighbouring yacht is to visit them early one morning and ask if they would like to join you in cottaging. Remember to carry your own bottle of vegetable oil, as soon as they see this the crew will know that you are an experienced cottager.
(derivative? moi?)
(derivative? moi?)
Mukes
New member
Correct Anchor selection is vital for crusing the British coast - post a question on the YBM.COM forums for advice before departure.
sarabande
Well-known member
Steam gives way to Sail
The Revenue Tax on our red diesel is returnable when you depart for your home port. Please apply to the Queen's Harbour Master.
Jet-skis are licensed on the basis that they must convey visiting yachtsmen from moorings to land, on demand. Jet skier drivers who do not comply can be legally shot at in daylight hours only.
When moored at a refuelling berth, you must offer the attendant a cigarette.
Charging a generator is ONLY permitted if the exhaust discharges overboard.
When you greet the Commodore (or other Committee member) in the bar, you must say slowly and carefully "So you use one of the stupid Rocna things."
Encourage your dogs to urinate on the pontoon, BEFORE you let them run freely ashore.
To encourage a good flow in the rivers, please leave the top and bottom paddles open for 30 minutes after you have closed the gates
Owing to recent EC Health and Safety legislation, all pump-out stations are temporarily closed. Provided you make a large wash as you leave quickly, you may discharge your holding tank overboard at any time.
If you see a fellow sailor using an inflatable or RIB without an official Plimsoll line, you should helpfully carve one in the starboard tube.
Please broadcast the 0525 Shipping Forecast over your flybridge speakers, as a service to your neighbours.
Large grey ships, especially those flying a US or UK offical ensign will always provide advice on your position if you pull alongside. It is not necessary to speak English to avail yourself of this service.
Your contribution to reducing the UK's carbon deficit and increasing our economic welfare is important, but regretfully, must be limited. Please bring no more than three foreign nationals (those standing on the pierhead at Ostende and Dover, for example). As a gesture of European solidarity from our new Prime Minister, no passports or understanding of English will be required for the next six months.
Bow thrusters must not be used in marinas unless you have a Master Mariner's certificate of competency.
The Revenue Tax on our red diesel is returnable when you depart for your home port. Please apply to the Queen's Harbour Master.
Jet-skis are licensed on the basis that they must convey visiting yachtsmen from moorings to land, on demand. Jet skier drivers who do not comply can be legally shot at in daylight hours only.
When moored at a refuelling berth, you must offer the attendant a cigarette.
Charging a generator is ONLY permitted if the exhaust discharges overboard.
When you greet the Commodore (or other Committee member) in the bar, you must say slowly and carefully "So you use one of the stupid Rocna things."
Encourage your dogs to urinate on the pontoon, BEFORE you let them run freely ashore.
To encourage a good flow in the rivers, please leave the top and bottom paddles open for 30 minutes after you have closed the gates
Owing to recent EC Health and Safety legislation, all pump-out stations are temporarily closed. Provided you make a large wash as you leave quickly, you may discharge your holding tank overboard at any time.
If you see a fellow sailor using an inflatable or RIB without an official Plimsoll line, you should helpfully carve one in the starboard tube.
Please broadcast the 0525 Shipping Forecast over your flybridge speakers, as a service to your neighbours.
Large grey ships, especially those flying a US or UK offical ensign will always provide advice on your position if you pull alongside. It is not necessary to speak English to avail yourself of this service.
Your contribution to reducing the UK's carbon deficit and increasing our economic welfare is important, but regretfully, must be limited. Please bring no more than three foreign nationals (those standing on the pierhead at Ostende and Dover, for example). As a gesture of European solidarity from our new Prime Minister, no passports or understanding of English will be required for the next six months.
Bow thrusters must not be used in marinas unless you have a Master Mariner's certificate of competency.
whipper_snapper
New member
If you see a dog on the pontoon that is wearing an orange coat with a handle on top, this is a water dog that has escaped. You must grab it by the handle and throw it into the water as far as you can.
Experts will accompy this with the traditional cry of 'buggeroff ya filthy pooch'
Experts will accompy this with the traditional cry of 'buggeroff ya filthy pooch'
gandy
Active member
At sea, as on the roads, a flashing blue light is an invitation to race.
gandy
Active member
[ QUOTE ]
As we drive on the other side of the road we regard red and green buoys the other way round to you.
[/ QUOTE ]That really will confuse the Yanks.
As we drive on the other side of the road we regard red and green buoys the other way round to you.
[/ QUOTE ]That really will confuse the Yanks.
G
Guest
Guest
Curtesy, good manners and general willingness to alter course - even heave to by Racing Charter Yachts to allow you unhindered passage is customary in Solent Waters.
shmoo
New member
I don't think all these posts are completely serious.