EME
Active member
Not sure which forum to post this on so here goes ...
Beware! Advice is often sort by forumites on getting their SWMBO/HWMBO more involved in boating. Advice from me is clear. DON’T! This time last year I rashly induced my SWMBO (known as TB) to do a sailing Practical Day Skipper with me. My life has changed forever.
I suppose the first thing I noticed was a road trip when I asked her to navigate … not usually a good idea and a request that in the past would have been declined.. However she jumped at the idea. Thirty miles later and I realised I had a problem.
Me: “ What are you doing with that compass?’
TB: ‘Taking Bearings”
Me: ‘What! We’re going much too fast to do an accurate cocked-hat”
TB; “Well slow down then, I ‘ve told you before you drive too fast”!”
Me: “Why can’t you read the motorway signs like everyone else?”
TB: ‘Because they don’t put signs on the map! Stupid! “
That bleeding compass now goes everywhere with us, road trips, coastal walks, I even spotted it once in a shopping bag as she left for Tescos. I offered to buy her a small handheld plotter but that was met with derision: -
‘’ I need to keep my hand in you know”
This of course was only the precursor to the real problem. Going Boating. If you’ve been here long enough you will know that our boating usually consists of a few trips on friends’ boats and the occasional charter of day boats when no one else is around. Given that most bareboat charterers now know me, our choice is getting rather limited, however a small new charterer opened this year in La Napoule: New Boats, Introductory Rates and Poor Character Assessment. Ideal. Boat booked, paid for and we are ready for the Saturday Adventure.
The preceding 3-days clearly demonstrated how boating has changed forever for us. Instead of preparation being a quick trip to the Supermarket to stock up on La Biere, Rosay and a few nibbles. Perhaps might even slap on the sun cream. Not now , I was treated to a 3-day housebound lock-in.
TB: “We’ve got to do a check list, Passage Plans, Contingency Plans and get Weather reports, and while we’re at it let’s do a few self-assessments on the col regs’
I should explain, we are in the Med, there has been a prevailing Force zero for the last two weeks with no change expected for another week. We will either turn left or right out of the marina … and the only navigation issue should be finding an unoccupied place to anchor.
Me: “NO Way!!”
Anyway, that’s what I did for the next three nights plan, plan and plan again. My only break was permission to decamp and get a new large-scale chart as one of hers was wearing out.
It all gets worse on the morning of the trip. I now realise that the pile of oilskins, jackets, spare jumpers, thermos, torches and newly-acquired flares which appeared overnight on the living - room floor are to go on the boat. It is 27 degrees ouside at 6 am.
I now know why so many boaters have 4x4s . It is put the paraphernalia in. However TB has only got a little Pug 206 - and so it is that a demented woman arrives at a South of France marina in June with the roof down, bits of 'stuff' hanging out of both sides , me perched on top of a 'inflatable' in the back seat. This is going to be fun...
To Be Continued
<hr width=100% size=1><font color=blue>I am WHAT I say I am</font color=blue>
Beware! Advice is often sort by forumites on getting their SWMBO/HWMBO more involved in boating. Advice from me is clear. DON’T! This time last year I rashly induced my SWMBO (known as TB) to do a sailing Practical Day Skipper with me. My life has changed forever.
I suppose the first thing I noticed was a road trip when I asked her to navigate … not usually a good idea and a request that in the past would have been declined.. However she jumped at the idea. Thirty miles later and I realised I had a problem.
Me: “ What are you doing with that compass?’
TB: ‘Taking Bearings”
Me: ‘What! We’re going much too fast to do an accurate cocked-hat”
TB; “Well slow down then, I ‘ve told you before you drive too fast”!”
Me: “Why can’t you read the motorway signs like everyone else?”
TB: ‘Because they don’t put signs on the map! Stupid! “
That bleeding compass now goes everywhere with us, road trips, coastal walks, I even spotted it once in a shopping bag as she left for Tescos. I offered to buy her a small handheld plotter but that was met with derision: -
‘’ I need to keep my hand in you know”
This of course was only the precursor to the real problem. Going Boating. If you’ve been here long enough you will know that our boating usually consists of a few trips on friends’ boats and the occasional charter of day boats when no one else is around. Given that most bareboat charterers now know me, our choice is getting rather limited, however a small new charterer opened this year in La Napoule: New Boats, Introductory Rates and Poor Character Assessment. Ideal. Boat booked, paid for and we are ready for the Saturday Adventure.
The preceding 3-days clearly demonstrated how boating has changed forever for us. Instead of preparation being a quick trip to the Supermarket to stock up on La Biere, Rosay and a few nibbles. Perhaps might even slap on the sun cream. Not now , I was treated to a 3-day housebound lock-in.
TB: “We’ve got to do a check list, Passage Plans, Contingency Plans and get Weather reports, and while we’re at it let’s do a few self-assessments on the col regs’
I should explain, we are in the Med, there has been a prevailing Force zero for the last two weeks with no change expected for another week. We will either turn left or right out of the marina … and the only navigation issue should be finding an unoccupied place to anchor.
Me: “NO Way!!”
Anyway, that’s what I did for the next three nights plan, plan and plan again. My only break was permission to decamp and get a new large-scale chart as one of hers was wearing out.
It all gets worse on the morning of the trip. I now realise that the pile of oilskins, jackets, spare jumpers, thermos, torches and newly-acquired flares which appeared overnight on the living - room floor are to go on the boat. It is 27 degrees ouside at 6 am.
I now know why so many boaters have 4x4s . It is put the paraphernalia in. However TB has only got a little Pug 206 - and so it is that a demented woman arrives at a South of France marina in June with the roof down, bits of 'stuff' hanging out of both sides , me perched on top of a 'inflatable' in the back seat. This is going to be fun...
To Be Continued
<hr width=100% size=1><font color=blue>I am WHAT I say I am</font color=blue>
