Momac
Well-known member
We have the same arrangement.
After several years of practice my crew is a highly skilled asset and makes my boat handling look good. I am sure it would not go so well if we reversed roles.
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Women Drivers (Helmspersons)
- Thread starter Martin&Rene
- Start date
We have the same arrangement.
After several years of practice my crew is a highly skilled asset and makes my boat handling look good. I am sure it would not go so well if we reversed roles.
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deckhanddave
New member
Usually the only time I take the helm while mooring or anchoring is when we long line. My wife's the stronger swimmer so I hold the boat in position against the anchor while she swims the lines ashore.
I think the only other time I helmed while parking this year was when we came alongside to be lifted out and she thought the space was a bit tight.
If there's any leaping to be done when mooring stern to then I do it, but usually someone from a nearby yacht will come to take our lines.
I think the only other time I helmed while parking this year was when we came alongside to be lifted out and she thought the space was a bit tight.
If there's any leaping to be done when mooring stern to then I do it, but usually someone from a nearby yacht will come to take our lines.
Victoria Sponge
New member
Yes, I'm the one who swims ashore with the longline. We've watched folk faffing about with lines and dinghies but if you're a strong swimmer this is a better option. I'm always go in crocs though, as you never know what you might stand on.
photodog
Lord High Commander of Upper Broughton and Gunthor
If I told my wife to swim ashore with the lines I would no longer have a wife.
there is no sexism or division of labor is on our boat. I do everything. Unless told otherwise.
there is no sexism or division of labor is on our boat. I do everything. Unless told otherwise.
Saguday
Active member
SWMBO does what she prefers, which seems to be mooring and anchoring and stepping ashore with lines. She helms when needed, such as on/off watches on overnight trips. In general she's happy to helm in open water, and in fact I note she's very good at hand-steering to tell-tales while I dick about with sail trim, although we hardly race now. She's good at the navigation too.
I've tried and tried to get her to helm in close-quarters but she is reluctant to do it, despite all the DS/CS/powerboat courses. It frustrates me a bit as I keep saying "what if I can't do it sometime?" but her answer is to train the kids up to do it instead
On the odd occasion some swimming ashore with lines was needed well that was my job, but *never* in cold UK waters - dinghy faff will do nicely thank you.
I've tried and tried to get her to helm in close-quarters but she is reluctant to do it, despite all the DS/CS/powerboat courses. It frustrates me a bit as I keep saying "what if I can't do it sometime?" but her answer is to train the kids up to do it instead
On the odd occasion some swimming ashore with lines was needed well that was my job, but *never* in cold UK waters - dinghy faff will do nicely thank you.
Birdseye
Well-known member
Job already done for you. See http://www.ybw.com/forums/showthread.php?415347-sailing-with-swmbo&highlight=
dancrane
Well-known member
Not necessarily...although I might not have said that when I bought my boat...but I've learned that the bulk of accepted opinion here and elsewhere, needn't be the last word.
Finding ways to achieve tasks singlehanded, which I had presumed I would get assistance with, has vastly increased my independence in a boat designed for two or three...
...and that means SWMBO (or other non-sailing friends) can come along as a relaxed passenger now, because it's actually better for us both if she does nothing at all.
It's also a pleasant little ego-boost, singlehanding a big double-handed dinghy past smaller, slower boats, filled with argumentative crews. Surprisingly, I don't even need any assistance on the slipway, although the boat's size elicits so much kindness from passers-by, it was many sailing days before I discovered I could haul-out quite easily on my own.
johnalison
Well-known member
My wife is perfectly capable of taking a watch, though she is uncomfortable on anything like a dead run. She used to helm in and out of harbour or mooring but no longer seems to have the confidence, possibly because our current boat is bigger and cost five times that previous one. We manage well enough.
lpdsn
New member
You're forgetting that the helm has to toss the anchor out.
Scotty_Tradewind
Active member
I managed to to get Mrs S to go on the Day Skipper theory course one winter.
I managed it by saying that my son was keen to do it yet lacked the confidence on his own and would she go with him.
Likewise, I asked my son would he go on the course with my wife (if I paid for him) as she lacked the confidence....etc....
Mrs S now has a real say where and when we go etc... with a little more knowledge has come much greater interest.
S.
I managed it by saying that my son was keen to do it yet lacked the confidence on his own and would she go with him.
Likewise, I asked my son would he go on the course with my wife (if I paid for him) as she lacked the confidence....etc....
Mrs S now has a real say where and when we go etc... with a little more knowledge has come much greater interest.
S.
Koeketiene
Well-known member
We have a relatively high freeboard, I can't jump (bad back and knees & left hip are shot).
In winter - when we're in a pontoon berth - I park the boat and the wife and/or offspring take the lines ashore. Add to that the fact that the wife does not feel comfortable at the helm in confined spaces such as a marina.
In summer - when we're on a swinging mooring - the wife is at the helm and I pick up the mooring (as yet, nothing wrong with my arms).
Koeketiene
Well-known member
If the wife wasn't interested, I very much doubt she would be my wife.
westhinder
Well-known member
If my wife wasn't interested, I very much doubt we would have a boat.
Ariadne
Active member
My Mrs prefers to be at the pointy end when dropping the anchor, or going alongside at a marina, but she is more than capable of helming it in on any occasion and all conditions.
As for jumping ashore with ropes, nobody does that, we step off the boat onto a pontoon or dock, you only need to jump if the helmsman can't helm!
As for jumping ashore with ropes, nobody does that, we step off the boat onto a pontoon or dock, you only need to jump if the helmsman can't helm!
Koeketiene
Well-known member
Bit of a generalisation, surely.
Our freeboard is 1.7m - even when I bring the boat right alongside the pontoon, you still need to jump.
RupertW
Well-known member
That's why we developed our practice at dropping ropes round cleats, and minimising the number of attachments, and also went for stern-to only so the I could step onto the pontoon once I'd roughly secured a midline. I would struggle with the two of us getting the boat in bows-to to a finger berth, and my wife would object a lot to having to clamber off the side of the boat to step ashore each time rather than just step off.
I'm sure if we needed to practice bows-to we could learn fairly rapidly but I don't see going back to that.
She always steers in while I deal with lines and ropes.
Scotty_Tradewind
Active member
Mrs S. practised a lot with a mid cleated rope which has a loop where the line passes through a plastic pipe... the theory being she could drop it over a cleat.
The jury is still out as after several attempts last season she discovered that her ability to play fairground games is not too good
Also our first port of call where she tried it was Cherbourg.....B' hopeless short fingers and no cleats in most places!
S.
The jury is still out as after several attempts last season she discovered that her ability to play fairground games is not too good
Also our first port of call where she tried it was Cherbourg.....B' hopeless short fingers and no cleats in most places!
S.
johnalison
Well-known member
I'm in a similar situation and my wife has difficulty unlooping a line from a shore cleat when I would throw a loop along the line to unflip it. I think the problem is that girls are not taught to throw in school games in the way that boys are, or were. Women don't seem able to give a ball or loop of line that flick of the wrist that is needed.The jury is still out as after several attempts last season she discovered that her ability to play fairground games is not too good
S.
mjcoon
Well-known member
Martin&Rene
Active member
Quite some years ago on a flotilla holiday in Greece, my wife talked with the female social organiser and found that she had done little sailing and so she suggested, "now is the time to learn". We were rather embarrassed the next day to see that the lead boat had a bent pulpit, as she had hit the harbour wall.
With that image in my mind, I was determined to find a way of ensuring we did not hit the main walkway with the bow of our yacht. Our finger pontoon berth meant that we turned to port and moored port side to. The complications were the fact that there is often a strong wind blowing on the port aft quarter blowing us into to the berth and off the pontoon, the saildrive kicks to starboard in reverse and our berthing partner was a large motor boat with flared bows, so we could definitely not "lay along side"
The solution was that I made up a small loop of rope about 40cm in diameter with some plastic tubing on it to give it stiffness. One rope was attached to this loop and run through a mid fairlead to a cleat that I could slide on our genoa tracks. This rope was marked so I could set it so that when we were moored it would be tight with the bows about 70cm away from the walkway. I have also noted where I need to put that mark in other marinas where the finger pontoons are different lengths. A second rope goes from the loop direct to a winch and is marked so that if this rope is tight we are just fender to fender with the motor boat.
When we come in, with my wife helming, I aim to step ashore and drop the loop over the cleat on the end of the pontoon and I also step ashore with the rope that will be the bow spring which has been looped over the bow cleat. As the mid-spring tightens, it brings the boat alongside the jetty, but also kicks the stern out and my wife stops this by winding in on the winch. The bows will also swing in, so we have a fender at the bow and I temporarily make off my rope on the dock cleat and we now consider the boat "parked". We then moor using bow and stern lines looped on to the dock cleats and made off on the boat.
We often leave these "Parking lines" attached as they can also come in useful when we cast off, as all we then need to do is slip loops of the dock cleats.
This year I must practice dropping the loop over the cleat whilst I am still on the boat, for when I get a bit older
With that image in my mind, I was determined to find a way of ensuring we did not hit the main walkway with the bow of our yacht. Our finger pontoon berth meant that we turned to port and moored port side to. The complications were the fact that there is often a strong wind blowing on the port aft quarter blowing us into to the berth and off the pontoon, the saildrive kicks to starboard in reverse and our berthing partner was a large motor boat with flared bows, so we could definitely not "lay along side"
The solution was that I made up a small loop of rope about 40cm in diameter with some plastic tubing on it to give it stiffness. One rope was attached to this loop and run through a mid fairlead to a cleat that I could slide on our genoa tracks. This rope was marked so I could set it so that when we were moored it would be tight with the bows about 70cm away from the walkway. I have also noted where I need to put that mark in other marinas where the finger pontoons are different lengths. A second rope goes from the loop direct to a winch and is marked so that if this rope is tight we are just fender to fender with the motor boat.
When we come in, with my wife helming, I aim to step ashore and drop the loop over the cleat on the end of the pontoon and I also step ashore with the rope that will be the bow spring which has been looped over the bow cleat. As the mid-spring tightens, it brings the boat alongside the jetty, but also kicks the stern out and my wife stops this by winding in on the winch. The bows will also swing in, so we have a fender at the bow and I temporarily make off my rope on the dock cleat and we now consider the boat "parked". We then moor using bow and stern lines looped on to the dock cleats and made off on the boat.
We often leave these "Parking lines" attached as they can also come in useful when we cast off, as all we then need to do is slip loops of the dock cleats.
This year I must practice dropping the loop over the cleat whilst I am still on the boat, for when I get a bit older
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