080653
New member
If you are thinking about dispensing with your loo in favour of the above method, here is an passage from my hopefully forthcoming book (if I ever get it finished!) on the JAC08 and preparation for same, that may be of use. I've used it in a few talks that I have given on the subject and have been asked repeatedly for a copy so here goes:
Bucket Drill
On my trip to the start at Plymouth, I found that the sea toilet had cracked and was leaking water into the boat. Fortunately this was flushing water but on inspection proved not easily remedied. I gained some storage space and saved a little weight by removing the object. This meant that I would have to use the time honoured ‘bucket and chuck it’ method. This is yet another subject that tends to get sidelined in instructional books. After all, one uses the bucket then tips the content overboard, end of story! Not a bit of it dear reader for there is a skill required that could usefully be practised ashore. More about that in a minute but first let’s look to the bucket itself. The best ones to have are those used in the building industry for mixing concrete. These are of heavy rubber construction with a good strong handle to which you should splice about a 2-metre lanyard. Boyo’s is the deluxe model as he has a piece of foam (the kind used for insulating central heating pipes) which he slots onto the rim to protect his delicate botty from the rusty handle. Assuming that you have acquired a suitable receptacle, hold tight to that rope and recite to yourself, the mantra; “Careful, this is the only bucket I’ve got”. This is a useful practice even if you have dozens of buckets because it tends to turn on the safety button in ones brain. Not only do you not want to lose the bucket, if you aren't securely braced, the drag on that bucket could have you overboard! From your well-braced position, draw up a couple of pints of water.
Shore Practice
We will go away from the sea for the rest of the practise session, as it is probably easier to explain to the landsman using more familiar objects from his world. Find yourself a good roller coaster, Boyo’s nearest at Flamingo Land amusement park is ideal. Taking your bucket with its water, climb into the third or fourth car. Even I am not stupid enough to try bucket drill on the bow! Enjoy the view while the car climbs up to the top and starts to freewheel. This is the time to place the bucket on the floor, drop your drawers and assume pixie like position on top of the receptacle whilst at all times holding onto the pail with one hand and the car with the other. The ride will plummet vertically down with you floating about 2 inches above the bucket, itself a similar distance from the floor. Pulling out of its dive, the ride will slam the bucket into the floor and your posterior further into said bucket than you previously thought possible. The following 2g turn will take you completely by surprise but by now you should be ready for the reversal to follow milliseconds later. You manfully try to complete your business as you experience the loop and rattle into another turn this time at 3g. If you have not produced something by now, you are probably terminally constipated and completely beyond hope!
Assuming the deed has been done, now comes the interesting part of the exercise. Remember that both hands are in action bracing yourself and the bucket against the gyrations of the wild ride. You must lever your bum out of the bucket in order to give room for a third hand to administer the loo roll. “Not enough hands!” I hear you cry. Try bracing a shoulder against a nearby bulkhead or seat. It gets a bit painful at times but I’ve found it to work quite well. It has now become even more essential that you do not lose hold of that bucket while you struggle back into your oilies. To simulate the journey from companionway into the cockpit, climb over into the next car. The ride is really getting going now, swooping and turning while you strive to cling on, so you should really be using your harness if only to practice keeping it out of the bucket! Take up a suitably braced position, lean well out and tip the contents clear of the ride. The ride will of course slam into another gut wrenching turn ensuring that either; the contents will stay put or conversely, you will go with them! It’s a bit of a lottery but the variety keeps life interesting. If your roller coaster is one of those ‘water-splash’ things then you can complete the drill by dunking the bucket for cleaning purposes, remembering of course to chant the mantra as before and take up a well-braced position.
Some sailors would advocate only using the bucket in the cockpit. In this case the above still applies, just choose a cold and rainy day for your practise!
This dear reader is far closer to the reality of ‘bucket drill’ out on the ocean than you will ever have imagined and is the main reason that I soon as I return from this trip, I will be re-installing a proper loo!
(Note: It's best to visit your roller-coaster very early in the morning in order to avoid the 'funny looks' from the other riders followed by immediate eviction from the facility!!)
Hope this helps
'Boyo' Jewitt (Golden Dragon)
Bucket Drill
On my trip to the start at Plymouth, I found that the sea toilet had cracked and was leaking water into the boat. Fortunately this was flushing water but on inspection proved not easily remedied. I gained some storage space and saved a little weight by removing the object. This meant that I would have to use the time honoured ‘bucket and chuck it’ method. This is yet another subject that tends to get sidelined in instructional books. After all, one uses the bucket then tips the content overboard, end of story! Not a bit of it dear reader for there is a skill required that could usefully be practised ashore. More about that in a minute but first let’s look to the bucket itself. The best ones to have are those used in the building industry for mixing concrete. These are of heavy rubber construction with a good strong handle to which you should splice about a 2-metre lanyard. Boyo’s is the deluxe model as he has a piece of foam (the kind used for insulating central heating pipes) which he slots onto the rim to protect his delicate botty from the rusty handle. Assuming that you have acquired a suitable receptacle, hold tight to that rope and recite to yourself, the mantra; “Careful, this is the only bucket I’ve got”. This is a useful practice even if you have dozens of buckets because it tends to turn on the safety button in ones brain. Not only do you not want to lose the bucket, if you aren't securely braced, the drag on that bucket could have you overboard! From your well-braced position, draw up a couple of pints of water.
Shore Practice
We will go away from the sea for the rest of the practise session, as it is probably easier to explain to the landsman using more familiar objects from his world. Find yourself a good roller coaster, Boyo’s nearest at Flamingo Land amusement park is ideal. Taking your bucket with its water, climb into the third or fourth car. Even I am not stupid enough to try bucket drill on the bow! Enjoy the view while the car climbs up to the top and starts to freewheel. This is the time to place the bucket on the floor, drop your drawers and assume pixie like position on top of the receptacle whilst at all times holding onto the pail with one hand and the car with the other. The ride will plummet vertically down with you floating about 2 inches above the bucket, itself a similar distance from the floor. Pulling out of its dive, the ride will slam the bucket into the floor and your posterior further into said bucket than you previously thought possible. The following 2g turn will take you completely by surprise but by now you should be ready for the reversal to follow milliseconds later. You manfully try to complete your business as you experience the loop and rattle into another turn this time at 3g. If you have not produced something by now, you are probably terminally constipated and completely beyond hope!
Assuming the deed has been done, now comes the interesting part of the exercise. Remember that both hands are in action bracing yourself and the bucket against the gyrations of the wild ride. You must lever your bum out of the bucket in order to give room for a third hand to administer the loo roll. “Not enough hands!” I hear you cry. Try bracing a shoulder against a nearby bulkhead or seat. It gets a bit painful at times but I’ve found it to work quite well. It has now become even more essential that you do not lose hold of that bucket while you struggle back into your oilies. To simulate the journey from companionway into the cockpit, climb over into the next car. The ride is really getting going now, swooping and turning while you strive to cling on, so you should really be using your harness if only to practice keeping it out of the bucket! Take up a suitably braced position, lean well out and tip the contents clear of the ride. The ride will of course slam into another gut wrenching turn ensuring that either; the contents will stay put or conversely, you will go with them! It’s a bit of a lottery but the variety keeps life interesting. If your roller coaster is one of those ‘water-splash’ things then you can complete the drill by dunking the bucket for cleaning purposes, remembering of course to chant the mantra as before and take up a well-braced position.
Some sailors would advocate only using the bucket in the cockpit. In this case the above still applies, just choose a cold and rainy day for your practise!
This dear reader is far closer to the reality of ‘bucket drill’ out on the ocean than you will ever have imagined and is the main reason that I soon as I return from this trip, I will be re-installing a proper loo!
(Note: It's best to visit your roller-coaster very early in the morning in order to avoid the 'funny looks' from the other riders followed by immediate eviction from the facility!!)
Hope this helps
'Boyo' Jewitt (Golden Dragon)
Last edited:
