age and giving up the boat

Birdseye

Birdseye

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How on earth do you decide when? Its been such an important part of our lives for 30 years that giving up will leave a yawning gap, and its easy to convince yourself that this year will be different and we really will use the boat. That somehow winching in the genoa will become easier. That maintenance wont require inflexible joints to bend to service the engine and the seacocks. That the boat really isnt becoming that bit less well maintained and looking that bit more unloved.

I'm 73. I'm healthy ( AFAIK) and reasonably slim / fit. But its getting hard.

If you have given up, how did you decide. If you havent given up yet, how well are you managing as you age.
 
Have you looked at a half way house?

We sold the boat last year and joined a boat share group. It wasn't that we are old or incapable, but we wanted a better boat, but could not afford to upgrade, and were concious we were not using the boat as much as we wanted.

So now in the boat share group, we don't own a boat, but we have 2 boats in 2 different locations available to use. Our share of the costs is less then we paid to keep pur own boat in a harbour and in sured. We only have to do a share of the maintenance and upgrades.

Another big part of it for us is I don't like sailing single handed and SWMBO is not always available. So now being in the group there is a pool of sailors available to go sailing with, so I hope the net result will be more sailing opportunities.
 
If you want to continue sailing with reduced physical capacity then either modify your existing boat to reflect your shortcomings or buy another boat that does not require such physical demands. You may also have to think about curtailing your ambitions as to how and where you sail. You may of course decide that less demanding sailing and an "easier" boat don't meet your needs and that it is probably time you gave up.

I won't bore folks again with how I dealt with the challenge as I have recounted previously at length the process of choosing, specifying and buying my new boat. My solution is of course not the only one, but the process of arriving at it is sound. Sit down and honestly assess what you perceive as the barriers and look at the solutions available to overcome them. This works for the hardware side of things, but does not necessarily deal with what you need to do to adjust to changing circumstances.
 
Yes, it gets more difficult and you will have to take things more slowly and modify your ambitions but I think you should let life events decide the way it ends, not some self imposed limit. Unless, of course, you have lost interest in the boat, in which case, move on.
Until then I will not be taking any premature decisions and if I die onboard... so be it.
 
When I was 73 I had already been in hospital twice with back problems and acquired other disorders on the way. Since then I have twice taken my 34' boat to the Baltic as well as the West Country and Northern France. I am a ten-stone weakling and I don't think that these achievements, if that's what they are, are anything special. Very little on my boat needs much physical effort, though hoisting the main can be a bit trying early in the season, when I wear gloves to make grip easier. I have sailed on boats smaller than mine which were much harder to a manage, so I think that one recipe for continued enjoyment is to make sure that everything works properly and that systems are as easy as possible. Electric winches have helped some of my friends, though I haven't felt he need for this.

What I now lack is stamina. My 34 is still about the right size for us but extended sails are now off the menu. I know people who have had to give up for obvious reasons (Parkinson's and arthritis) but often the cause is just lack of confidence. I don't think that a fit 73er should feel himself to be at the end of his sailing career, but in the end it comes down to what satisfaction is being obtained. Perhaps the OP should now start to do some racing?
 
I've thankfully (and hopefully) got quite a few years to go before this question becomes pertinent for me, but nonetheless, I see others with this dilemma all to often. Or, I see the boats which tell me that they may well be at this stage, whether they realise it or not. Not sure if my thoughts are really on topic, but here goes.

Boating is meant to be fun. When it becomes a labour (of love or otherwise) then perhaps its time for something different.

My father in law recently declined to help escort my eldest child who is learning to sail in an optimist. Rather sadly, he said he no longer had the confidence to be on the water alone, especially looking after a child (who is actually a very well behaved and engaged boy, who loves his sailing and isn't a little nightmare like many!). He's only in his late-sixties, but it's too much for him - psychologically more than physically perhaps. The same goes for his dinghy sailing - sold his boats a couple of years ago because the effort outweighed the pleasure. This from a man who is a long time sailing instructor and racing man. As much as I hope to still be sailing longer than him, I respect the fact that he's made a clear decision that enough is enough and he's busy doing other things that he enjoys - including new hobbies that have filled a void, something that surprised his family given his love for the sport. There is life after sailing.

Another older friend has gradually moved his boat from a mainstream (excuse the pun) marina, first to more of a backwater place and finally this season just gone to a swinging river mooring. The boat looks a state compared to how it was, and the fact that he now finds it harder to access ("bit choppy for the dinghy today, might wait until tomorrow") means that he hasn't used it anywhere near as much as last year and the routine maintenance and just time sitting on the boat doing nothing in particular, has similarly gone down. Pressure from a non-sailing wife to economise led in part to the move, and now its been made, I doubt he'll change back to a walk-on pontoon. He'll sell the boat - probably 5 years after he probably should.

I bought another boat a couple of years back from family friends (in their early seventies) who couldn't even identify where it was in the boatyard - or indeed, whether it was their boat at all at first. It had sat there for 5 years at least (judging by invoices etc.) because Mrs had got a fright one day and Mr couldn't sail it alone. His grand plans to have his son sail with him didn't materialise because son was too busy having his own life and family, as we do. They let me have that boat for about 1/8 of what I sold it for a year later after minimal restoration, and to be honest, I think would probably have given it to me if I'd asked. Even so, I know that they felt an enormous relief that they no longer had either the liability of a boat sitting there disintegrating quietly, and the thought hanging over them that they really ought to be using the boat but couldn't bring themselves to do so.

What about finding someone who loves boats but either can't afford the purchase or upkeep and training them up in boat ownership - not necessarily sailing? You provide the boat, they provide the labour and perhaps a contribution to mooring and upkeep? You get to sail with them and they do the hard work?

When it comes to enjoyment - perhaps a change of focus is what's required? If in the past long cruises a deux were your preference, perhaps inviting a few more people along for day sails is the new way? In fact, even if a move into racing isn't for you - what about a completely different type of boat - perhaps a day-sailor like an XOD or, for lesser maintenance concerns, something like a J80? Worth trying something different perhaps.
 
I am 82 and my wife over 70 but hope to keep sailing for a few more years yet. The previous owner was 80 when he sold her to us and he had already converted the sheet winches to electric. I have bought a Winchrite to help with jib furling and the Mainsheet if required. In mast furling also helps. To aid Marina maneovering last winter bow thrusters were fitted. We are planning an extended cruise this year, but will probably recruit helpers to assist with the passages to and from the chosen area.
We live a long way from the sea and I suspect it will be the 3.25 hr. car journey each way that will finally force us to give up. Not too daunting if to go sailing, but demotivating before antifouling or worse, laying up!
Incidentally the previous owner went on to a Hanse with a self tacking jib to prolong his sailing until he passed away at 86.
Keep going-look forward.
 
When we berthed at James Watt Dock, for part of one season the boat the other side of our finger belonged to an elderly gentleman - a small Sadler (26?), I think. He sailed her very well, berthing without leaving the cockpit! He made it all look very easy.But it all came down to everything having been thought out and prepared in advance. He knew exactly what he was going to do and when he was going to do it. We once offered to take his lines, and he refused (courteously) and then proceeded to show us how to do it! But basically, he had a boat that he could handle and had arranged everything to make it as easy as possible to handle her. He was a good neighbour, too - very willing to pass on tips to make life easier.
 
You never know whats around the corner :)

My plan A) was to give up offshore sailing at 71 and plan B just keep dinghy sailing at our local lake so I advertised my Colvic Watson in the summer of July of 2017 expecting it would take about 6 months
to sell her at a reasonable price and would still leave myself the rest of the year for sailing (as I sail all year round}.

Opp's Plan A went totally turned turtle up when 'she sold in six days', and apart from the dread-full day I loaded her onto the buyers transport a week later I said goodbye to a good friend and surprisingly
did not miss her for the rest of the year.

However I missed sailing a lot offshore all 2018 and hence now at 73 with the usual old aged creaks I have for the past four months been looking for another one.

Sailing 98% of the time single handed yes as others have said you can somewhat rig the boat out to make sailing a lot easier for yourself, Yes its a somewhat buyers market but beware
from what I have viewed so far 'you gets what you pay for' even on a budget but now is the time to buy :)
 
In spring 2016, getting toward the end of my eighth decade with a new metal knee, I was working up the mast of our Finngulf 33, after launch, fitting transducers, adjusting spreader angles (she had discontinuous rigging) etc. my wife was manning the halyard and trying to hear my shouted requests. It was a cold afternoon and the job took longer than normal. When I came down she said 'Do you not think we are getting a bit too old for this'? We went home and talked about it, the boat went on the market and sold 5 moths later. Even before it was agreed I knew I was not really happy with our decision. In the winter we looked at campervans but in the end we bought a Nimbus motor cruiser, fettled and launched it, we went to Tobermory once but despite being quicker the trips were incredibly boring, worse than the car or even the bus. Luckily it sold quickly at the end of the summer so I was able to buy a Moody S31 for the 2018 season and we are both back sailing, with a smaller and simpler rig though much slower than the Finngulf, she is easy to set up and to handle. It is nice to be back with a tiller. We motor more than ever, spend more nights (and days) alongside pontoons, we only beat if is warm and the wind is 3 or 4 and we tend to break trips in to shorter legs but we can still get to Skye and Torridon. A three blade folding prop. an anchor windlass, an oversize Spade add to our comfort and a reliable autopilot is essential now.
I am convinced we are both stronger and healthier than we would be otherwise and anyway she refuses to let me buy a motorbike.
 
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There was an interesting relevant article years ago in PBO's publication 'Which Boat'. The author and family had a large catamaran, but some illness (including joint problems IIRC) had gradually made operating winches, etc., very painful. They eventually very reluctantly sold her, and (later?), because they missed boating, bought a little 19 Mirror Offshore motor-sailer: a boat they wouldn't previously have given the time of day.

In fact they found it huge fun, and very easy to handle, giving them a whole new lease of 'sailing life'.

It certainly won't suit everyone, but downsizing, and questioning previous prejudices, might be worth contemplating for some as the annos start to dominate.
 
birdseye said:
How on earth do you decide when?
[ .... ]
If you have given up, how did you decide. If you havent given up yet, how well are you managing as you age.
Click to expand...
I'm writing this from a Swiss recuperation clinic two weeks after emergency surgery just before Christmas to remove a massive and malignant colon tumour.

The first symptom was a stabbing pain in the abdomen the day after a single-handed day sail in late October when I could manage everything as well as any other day. Yes, winching in that last few turns on the genoa sheet seemed a shade harder than usual, such that when the pain began I thought I must have induced a muscle hernia the day before when at sea and waited for it to heal while I slowly cleared the boat out for the winter lay-up.

So it wasn't until I arrived home at the end of November that I thought to do something about those pesky gut-twinges when I pressed on a certain spot just above the right hip bone. All hell broke loose after my GP proposed an ultra-sound then the colonoscopy that identified the lurking disaster and associated metastasis fallout.

So at the tender age of 83, 2018 was my last year of sailing, something I had never planned for nor expected as I seemed so fit and able to handle everything aboard so easily.

Luckily, some sixth sense persuaded me to put the boat in order and up for sale before the bomb fell, so that the only effect was then to cut the price to a very silly one that has generated a lot of enquiries. Suddenly, the price difference and possible financial loss has no relevance whatsoever.
 
Barnac1e said:
I'm writing this from a Swiss recuperation clinic two weeks after emergency surgery just before Christmas to remove a massive and malignant colon tumour...Luckily, some sixth sense persuaded me to put the boat in order and up for sale before the bomb fell, so that the only effect was then to cut the price to a very silly one that has generated a lot of enquiries. Suddenly, the price difference and possible financial loss has no relevance whatsoever.
Click to expand...
How awful. Dad had a similar diagnosis and op at age 70 and survived 21 years. I hope it goes as well for you. Next winter if you are in fair strength and want a sail in the Caribbean, contact me. I and or my pals will be there most of the winter.
 
Kurrawong_Kid said:
We live a long way from the sea and I suspect it will be the 3.25 hr. car journey each way that will finally force us to give up. Not too daunting if to go sailing, but demotivating before antifouling or worse, laying up!
Click to expand...

I have observed a number of people deciding to give up sailing due to age, when the issue was not the actual sailing but the non-sailing bits (eg maintenance work). They may have been better to think more laterally and give up the non-sailing bits instead!

Almost all of the laying up and recommissioning process would be formally viewed as "waste" (ie wasted effort) in any formal process / work analysis. Instead of doing so keeping the boat in commission all year round, perhaps moving into a marina berth for the winter, saves a huge amount of effectively pointless work (and discomfort).
And if you get an extra 5-10 years sailing as a result, will it make any noticeable difference to the boat condition and value - probably not if done thoughtfully. (Our boats have stayed in commsission for circa 10 years with no adverse effects).
Paying for an annual engine service is not very expensive. And likely find that the cost of paying for applying the antifoul is immaterial compared to the costs of lift out and the materials.
So if working on the boat is getting hard work - simply stop doing it, other than the "boat fiddling" you actually do for enjoyment.
 
Sam Llewellyn wrote somewhere - as best I can remember - that the natural progression was "small boat, bigger boat, shared boat, friend's boat, motor boat". Maybe it's a matter of moving on, not away?
 
dunedin said:
So if working on the boat is getting hard work - simply stop doing it, other than the "boat fiddling" you actually do for enjoyment.
Click to expand...

I think that there is much to be said for this, for those who can afford it. I look forward to the fitting-out season with some anxiety, but there is some satisfaction in looking at the hull after a couple of weeks on & off and seeing it all shiny and antifouled, but I would rather pay a few hundred pounds for the yard to do this than give up sailing.

In the end, there is no magic way of arranging the future. To my mind there are two ways of dealing with it. You either soldier on and expect to cope if a crisis occurs (or your spouse to), or alternatively phase yourself out in good time and risk missing out on several or many years of pleasure. Neither way is right or wrong but we just do what suits us. I am not tempted to downsize to a smaller cruiser because they are both less comfortable and often actually harder to manage. If i do swap, it will to a day-boat or dinghy.
 
I am 51 (and feeling it!) - but so I have no personal experience to speak of.

However, when I sometimes do business in Australia, I fly via Sydney where I spend weekends in the harbour, either racing as crew or cruising out of the heads for fun; one time we saw whales. My favoured skipper is a guy - now a friend - called Peter. Peter is 89.

Peter is an inspiration to me for if I ever get to his age. Now walking with a stick and with failing knees, it's hard, but he climbs aboard his boat with a little help and he's great at delegating to a crew (which I am bad at). That said, he's never happier than teasing up a start line, tiller in hand and calling the sail trim. He competes weekly. He's also pretty cool company.

Soon, Peter will need a marina berth as climbing aboard from the club tender will be too risky - or too stressful for everyone else!

Personally, if I get there and I can afford it, I'll just keep buggering on until life denies me the option.
 
Barnac1e said:
I'm writing this from a Swiss recuperation clinic two weeks after emergency surgery just before Christmas to remove a massive and malignant colon tumour.
Click to expand...

So sorry to hear about this, but glad to hear you’ve had the op. Lots of positive wishes coming your way.

With a forum name like that, I imagine you’ll live up to the name and be a tenacious b*gger, so go for it!

All the very best to you.
 
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