YBM.com and Pantaenius

[claymore]

You know how Kim got a bit defensive a while back - protective almost - when Pantaenius came under fire for imposing a few price hikes and declining a few policies?
Claymore knows why.
In my stand coffee comparison exercise on Saturday morning at LBS, I took coffee on the Pantaenius stand - in order to compare with the previous days Saga experience.
Readers will be shocked as I was to learn that the Pantaenius Lady was wearing her I.D. badge in a plastic thingy around her neck that had a YBW.COM logo emblazoned all over the blue neckstrap.
So now we know - the cats out, QED, conspiracy theory proven. I think we are owed an explanation.



<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[tcm]

Um, sorry to blow away the conspuiracy but i thinik you will find that sponsoring the id badge strap is an advertising opportunity dreamed up by the show organisrs to make a few extra quid so all of them had this? You may have noticed that some stands also "stood out" on the guides for no particular reason other than they paid extra to be "featured" on the map. Some others may have paid for their name on the placcky bags, and so on.

Some people have taken this a step further and rented out the space on their bald heads for advertising, which sounds very sensible to me. The choice of product would have to be carefully chosen to avoid embassment and yet maximise use of the available space, i imagine.

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[IanPoole2]

Conspiracy theory

Does that mean we can blame them for the Iraq war and global warming?

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[claymore]

Dear Sir
I understand from your marketing material that you lease advertising space on bald heads. I myself personally have one of these and have an added advantage that my inside leg measures a mere 27.5 ins, making my aforementioned pate available to a wider (shorter) audience. I assume from this that I can command a higher fee than the likes of yourself for 2 very good reasons. 1) You are not in possession of a bald head (unless Jimi is correct in his observation and that is in fact a syrup that you are sporting) 2) you are 7ft 9ins tall making it impossible for anyone other than top deck Bus travellers and 1st floor office workers to view.
I have read the terms and conditions and whilst I feel that 23% is a little steep I'm prepared to enter into a contract with you and will be available for Cannes Film Festival, Boot, Amsterdam, Southampton and LBS.
I look forward to receiving my contract and first check for retainer fees covering period 19th Jan to 22nd April
In terms of ethical standards - I would prefer not to advertise products that might be linked with products of a toxic, envronmentally unfriendly nature and as I have blue eyes, could we stay away from 'Pink' products
yours etc...

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[Ohdrat]

there would need to be clause in the contract that ensured the bald head would not wear a hat at any time.. or a scarf.. etc.. or a wig..which sort of puts paid to the period drama luvvies..

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[tcm]

Re: bald head advertising

Dear sir

I am delighted to hear that you have accepted our proposals and I have several opportunities you may wish to consider. I had hoped to offer you a part in the Diageo campaign for a "Pure Genius" logo, not an unattractive proposition, but this advertising method has been very popular and all the required square footage (headage?) has been taken up.

Nonetheless, the soft drinks market is bouffant (oops i mean buoyant) and i hope you will agree to join the "I've been Tangoed!" campaign at the higher rates as you discussed. For this, your head would be sprayed entirely orange except for the logo.

Alternatively, do please make suggestions regarding other advertisers that we might pursue.

regards etc


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[claymore]

Re: bald head advertising

Whilst not entirely saying No to the I've been tangoed suggestion - with respect- would I not begin to look remarkably like CC49 and wouldn't he be the one who just might nick off with my hard earned ackkers on some kind of clause like the one which is floating around at the moment where the bloke's something or other has been restricted or compromised.....?

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[tcm]

Re: bald head advertising

I think you may be mistaken - Ccscott is one of our most succesful agents - currently contracted to simulateneously promote the latest range of interchangeable Vileda cleaning mops on his head, also the dual-purpose t-shirt-and-J-Cloth AND the amazing Dubarry distressed-look rat-repelling stinky deck shoes.

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[jimi]

Have you considered renting out your arse? Consider the advantages ... large area and multimedia ..

<hr width=100% size=1>.. whit way roon should it be again ..

 

[Ohdrat]

errrr might this have a negative affect on the market!

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[jimi]

Nah .. it'll blow 'em away!

<hr width=100% size=1>.. whit way roon should it be again ..

 

[Aja]

Re: bald head advertising

Whit about 'Duraglit' or 'Brasso'


Donald


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[claymore]

I would point out that ma airse is perfectly formed, has not dropped and is always under control - unlike the one belonging tae yin o' they buggers a' dined wi on Friday evening

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[kimhollamby]

Explanation

Everyone just loves us. Well, actually, the truth is really everyone just loves our exhibition neck wear. Thinking of closing this site (well, forums at least) and charging a fiver for them next time around. Much more profitable.

Oh, and by the way, the only thing I was defending against was a solicitor profiting at our expense /forums/images/icons/smile.gif

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[longjohnsilver]

Lucky Mrs Claymore

Hope she can cope with a 27.5" inside leg, how long are the two outer ones?? Just think what advertising revenue could be generated by putting that on display! But then you have probably already done this, come to think of it I'm sure I recognised you from one of the star parts on cable tv last nite! /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

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[ParaHandy]

hivvens .. now look whit ye've done ... ah wiz jist aboot tae start a noo thread on whit wiz ra best plastic bag o ra show - ra Yachting World yin wiz braw - but it'd be sheen as shitofancy and he'll be stiffing us fer a fiver next year now .. jings ...

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[sailorman]

i also had coffee with the very nice lady, failed to note what she had around her neck.
i did notice that others had "icom" necklaces holdind up their name tags.
guess its all sponsorship to the nth degree
i have a bald head any offers (quite a lot of space available)

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[claymore]

Re: Explanation

Kim you are a pink crash helmet man too - fancy a few bob out of TCM's little scheme?

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[claymore]

Re: Lucky Mrs Claymore

27 an a half INCHES ye daft wee parrot fancier - jings ah'd be a tall as TCM ef ma legs wiz that lang. Stood next tae him last Friday evening - just stood there looking straight forward, right intae his pierced navel

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[longjohnsilver]

Ar#e and elbow

Typical bludy lecherer, doesn't know his feet ' from his inches"! Back to playskool with you!

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