Time for an update

[Twister_Ken]

I discovered a traditional sea shanty in my copy of The Art of Coarse Sailing, Michael Green, Hutchinson, 1962, 12s/6d. I suspect the shanty could do with a modern makeover. Any takers?

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Rolling Down to Burnham

Oh, sitting in the yacht club bar
A-listening to the wind
I spied a pretty maiden
A-drinking it-and-gin

Chorus
With a rifo, rifo, stick it up the mast-oh
Away, away, look away

Oh she did look so pretty
In her sweater chunky knit
That I upped me anchor straight away
And by her I did sit

With a rifo, rifo, etc

Oh maiden, maiden, maiden
When will you marry me?
Alas, alas I cannot
Actually, I'm engaged to a rather nice chap who works for an oil firm

With a rifo rifo, etc.



<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.writeforweb.com/twister1>Let's Twist Again</A>

 

[ShipsDog]

Ribbing out of Lymington

Oh, shitting on the yacht club bog
A-listening to the wind
I heard Brendan S
Revving up his thing

Chorus
With a wifo, wifo, stick her up the mast-oh
Away, away, look away

Oh she did look so pretty
In her sweater chunky knit
That I upped me anchor straight away
And upon her I did spit

With a wifo, wifo, etc

Oh Brendan,Brendan,Brendan
When will you marry me?
Alas, alas I cannot
Actually, I'm engaged to a rather nice chap who works for an oil firm

With a wifo wifo, etc

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[powerskipper]

Rolling Down to the follys

Oh, sitting in the bar
A-listening to the wind
I spied a pretty Doris
A-drinking J2O

Chorus
With a hic hic, wish I could still climb the mast-oh
Away, away, look away

Oh she did look so pretty
In her musto sailing top
That I upped me ars straight away
And by her I did fall.

With a hic hic, etc

Oh Dear Doris Dear Doris Dear Doris
When will you Sh..g me?
Alas, alas I cannot
actually; I'm bunking with rather nice chap who works for IT firm

with a , hic hic etc.


<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/>http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/</A>
Julie

 

[Twister_Ken]

4/10

Like the idea, but the ryhming's gone a bit awry.

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[tome]

Scrolling Down to Bembridge

Oh, sitting at my keyboard here
A-reading all the posts
I spied a pretty windup
Of pop-up ghouls and ghosts

Chorus
With a Kimbo, Kimbo stick it in the sinbin
Away, away, look away

When I looked at it more closely
Up popped an ugly git
He came from a foreign yacht club
And didn't have much wit

With a Kimbo, Kimbo

Oh Julie, Julie, Julie
When will you marry me?
Alas, alas I cannot
I stand up when I pee

With a Kimbo, Kimbo

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[jimi]

Sailing up a Jersey

Oh, sitting in the yacht club bar
A-listening to the wind
I spied a bustie lassie
and thought I'd give her yin

Chorus
Rumpty tumptie tumptie oh
tumptie oh tumptie oh

Oh she did look so pretty
without her sweater chunky knit
That I upped the ante straight away
And grabbed the nearest tit

With a Rumpty tumptie tumptie oh etc

Oh lassie lassie lassie
That wisnae verra fair
Alas, alas I cannot
talk at a' noo stretched oot on the flair!
With a Rumpty tumptie tumptie oh etc

<hr width=100% size=1><P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by jimi on 04/11/2004 13:47 (server time).</FONT></P>

 

[BrendanS]

I don't think I've ever been rhymified before! I'd have been even more impressed if you'd got Iditarod into it! <g>

<hr width=100% size=1>Me transmitte sursum, caledoni

 

[Twister_Ken]

8/10

Lose one mark for spelling, one for owning a Bennie.

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[Twister_Ken]

6/10

And all for the last verse

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[jhr]

Rolling on the floor in Essex

Oh, sittin' on my motor boat
A - watchin' DVDs
I spied an Essex girlie
And I thought "Phwoar! Yes please"!

With a yoo-hoo, Malibu, stick it up yer flue
Away, wa-hey! Have it away!

A sight she was for sore eyes
In her boob tube tight and clingy
So I thought "I'll 'ave a bit of that
In me blow-up rubber dinghy"

With a yoo-hoo etc.

Oi! Darlin', wassyer name
An' shall we 'ave a sh@g?
Shut yer mouth, yer cheeky sod
I ain't no bleedin' slag!

With a yoo-hoo etc



<hr width=100% size=1>Je suis Marxiste - tendance Groucho

 

[Twister_Ken]

7/10

A trifle disrepectful to the fair maidens of Essex. Especially those from Burnham way.

I quote Ian Dury as reference:

"Oh golly, oh gosh come and lie on the couch
With a nice bit of posh from Burnham-on-Crouch"

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[jhr]

Re: 7/10

I was thinking more of Janet from the Isle of Thanet - and the helpful assistance of her father /forums/images/icons/smile.gif.

<hr width=100% size=1>Je suis Marxiste - tendance Groucho

 

[mirabriani]

Re: 7/10

I think Jimi has it (Rabbie turn in grave)
However Tome and JHR are close behind
So much talent!

Briani


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[nicho]

Pam Ayres you ain't!!

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[powerskipper]

Don't look like her either /forums/images/icons/smile.gif

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/>http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/</A>
Julie

 

[Gunfleet]

Re: 7/10

We don't mind. We're not unrealistic. You want to walk along Colchester High Street on a Saturday night. The girls are worse than the blokes. A seasoned up hyena could not have been more obscener.

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[Mudplugger]

Re: 7/10

John, What are you doing in Colchester High St. on a Saturday night? There were recent reports of a strange gentleman? taking photographs of pre-pubescent (pre-25 year old locally) females in short skirts. I understand that the local nick are taking interest. Regards Tony W.

<hr width=100% size=1>Tony W.

 

[Gunfleet]

Re: 7/10

Walking home. And seriously for a minute I wish they would sober up a bit out of respect for themselves if no-one else. How middle-aged of me!

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