Scotland v. England

[jimi]

A family of England supporters head out shopping one Saturday before
Christmas.

While in a sport shop, the son picks up a Scotland rugby shirt and says to
his sister, "I've decided I'm going to be a Scotland supporter and I'd like
this shirt for my Christmas!"

The sister is outraged at this, promptly whacks him round the head and says,
"Go talk to your mother." Off goes the little lad, with Scotland shirt in
hand and finds his mother.

"Mum"

"Yes, son?"

"I've decided I'm going to be a Scotland supporter and I'd like this shirt
for my Christmas."

The mother is outraged at this, promptly whacks him round the head and says,
"Go talk to your father."

Off he goes with the Scotland shirt in hand and finds his father.

"Dad."

"Yes, son?"

"I've decided I'm going to be a Scotland supporter and I would like this
shirt for my Christmas."

The father is outraged at this, promptly whacks his son round the head
and says, "No son of mine is ever going to be seen in THAT!"

About half an hour later, they are all back in the car heading home. The
father turns to the son and says, "Son, I hope you've learned an important
lesson today?"

The son turns to his father and says, "Yes, Father, I have".

Father says," Good son, and what is it?"

The son replies "I've only been a SCOTLAND supporter for an hour and I
already hate you English ba*tards!!!"


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[Tiger Rag]

It' s tempting to rise to the bait, but I'm sure Messers Johnson, Wilkinson et al will do our talking for us very soon!

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[claymore]

I feel another fiver coming on for the lifeboat.
Scotland 16 - England 12.
Man of the match - Kenny Logan.

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[Divemaster1]

Yesh Mr. Bond

Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson, and bragged that despite his 72 years of age, he could still have sex 3 times a night. Lulu, who was also a guest, looked intrigued!

After the show, Lulu said, "Sean, if Ah'm no bein too forward, Ah'd love tae hae sex wi an aulder man. Lets go back tae mah place."

So they go back to her place and have great sex. Afterwards, Sean says, "If you think that was good, let me shleep for half an hour, and we can have even better shex! But while I'm shleeping, hold my baws in your left hand and my wullie in your right hand."

Lulu looks a bit perplexed, but says, "Okay." He sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even better sex. Then Sean says, "Lulu, that was wonderful. But if you let me shleep for an hour, we can have the besht shex yet! But again, hold my baws in your left hand, and my wullie in your right hand." Lulu is now used to the routine and complies. The results are mind blowing!

Once it's all over, and the cigarettes are lit, Lulu asks, "Sean, tell me, dis, mah haudin yer baws in mah left hand and yer wullie in mah right stimulate ye while ye're sleepin?" Sean replies, "No, but the lasht time I slept with a Glashwegian, she shtole my wallet!"


<hr width=100% size=1>Alf

 

[tcm]

Hm. Those northern lifeboats must be very well funded with repeated fivers. I think England will beat Scotland by a margin of over 40 points.

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[jimi]

Fiver says they do'nt

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[tcm]

Deal!

BUT

An english fiver, not a scottish one.


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[jimi]

English or Scots poons

It'll hurt just as much ...

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[ccscott49]

I'll take that bet aswell!!

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[Bejasus]

Me too!!..................../forums/images/icons/crazy.gif.........

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00>http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00</A>

 

[tcm]

I'm not sure how much off-course betting we are allowed here BUT I must shorten the odd to um a 25 point margin for the fiver.

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[sailbadthesinner]

25 points and i'll have a tenner on england

(now where is my wallet?)

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>Ok brain let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.</font color=red>

 

[tcm]

Re: shut up shut up

erm look i am on my way to losing all ends up here. So er I should not accept the bet. I think

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[claymore]

Too late came the cry

Its a done deal - in writing - with witnesses.
I'll have a dibble as well.

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[tcm]

Re: oi!

You can have a fiver on a 25point margin. Gulp, this is getting expensive. Or, very profitable. Seeing as how england beat SA by 50 points, and scotland actually beaten by well, everyone rather badly, it's just a matter of how long that wilko spends over his conversion kick really, innit.

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[claymore]

Re: oi!

The news is interesting about Jonny Wilkinsons groin - could be out for the rest of the season, Back is struggling, Johnson - well he's just unpleasant - but not as unpleasant as Brian Moores teeth - how on earth do you let yourself get like that?
Anyway - I'm very tempted to have a fiver on your fiver about the fiver being english or scots and then how many fivers we are talking about here. I could fund my mooring for the year out of this.

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
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[sailbadthesinner]

Re: oi!

twenty says my tenner is english and the other fiver is also english
i am offering 3:1 that scotland score first try
oh blast iam confused

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>Ok brain let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer</font color=red>

 

[Bejasus]

all very well, but........

.......but the original the x £5 bets should stand at a 40 point margin. If you as bookmaker late choose to shorten the odds, then that is of course your prerogative, but the original bets at the longer odds should stand.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00>http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00</A>

 

[tcm]

Re: rien ne va plus

right i wonder if anyone cd establish who has bet what.


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[sailbadthesinner]

Re: plus sa change

I think we are in trouble if scotland win
still maybe they will name alifeboat after us.

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>Ok brain let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer</font color=red>