Oh no - The wife has just got here day skipper

[pagoda]

Sunbathing, UK coast, at sea????? You must be joking - she'd have nipples like baptist chapel hat pegs!

Most men put women off. Whole load of possible reasons from by providing an old dirty small boat, to the macho man thrash to windward against an F6, to the shouting and yelling ............ But you are right - most men do seem to sail alone or with other men, and chatting to the ladies who do come down to our club makes it painfully obvious why that is.

You catch bees with honey.

Life's a compromise. Live & let live? My wife helms when anchoring & doing pick ups, I helm generally in harbours/marinas. We BOTH helm in open water..
I make sure I listen to forecasts, and minimise F6+ thrashing, she makes sure below decks is a pleasant place to be once we tie up...
Share enough responsibility to build confidence all round and you will not go far wrong.
Nipples like baptist chapel hat pegs are optional, but make absolutely sure there is hot water for a shower later

 

[kunyang]

I am proud of her, and she is a very keen sailor. She just lacked a bit of confidence, but I think she has had a boost now.

 

[Scotty_Tradewind]

like baptist chapel hat pegs )

Nah!.... 'like organ stops' !

 

[snowleopard]

I'm reminded of a 'shouting scenario' that we witnessed whilst on holiday this summer.
The skipper from a charter boat could be heard clearly shouting upon entering the anchorage.
Sadly for all concerned, it seemed as if he had very little idea as to what to do and neither had his crew. Small disciplines required for setting an anchor and motoring back to moor on a rock are hardly difficult in calm conditions. They still need to be rehearsed or explained clearly though, so that embarassments don't happen.
The boat boy at this particular anchorage went out in a rib to offer his help and was shouted at too, so he left the scene.
Some minutes later the skipper whistled over to the boat boy who went back and listened to the skippers request and simply gave the reply 'No'. The 'boy' had been shouted at once... too often.
The skipper was seen to be still trying to anchor with lots of shouting a half hour later before motoring off..... a really sad affair especially for his crew.

I witnessed a scene very similar to that a few years ago. A large boat was trying to berth in Dartmouth and the skipper was yelling at the top of his voice. It turned out to be Chay Blyth.

 

[swatchways]

I think you'll find that "most men" have not found a lady with sufficient interest who would be capable of these things, and any frustration is down to their SWMBO sunbathing while they handle the boat AND deal with the ropes.

Mmmm, or perhaps it's that those of us who have sufficient interest and are capable of these things prefer not to sail with fellas that try to tell them how it works.. (not trying to suggest that's necessarily what you do btw) but it absolutely does my head in when fellas "assume" things of women - like when you're rowing in from the mooring because the outboard's given up and someone suggests you may have forgotten to top up the fuel - because of course that's the reason it's stopped, wasn't anything to do with the clogged carb. or anything!

 

[GrahamM376]

Good for her. My wife also did DS out of Mercury a good few years ago. It made my life much easier particularly on longer passages as we share most "sailing" jobs except sail trimming in strong winds. We take it in turns to pick up the mooring, coming alongside etc. I can even kip while she keeps a night watch on radar in fog.

 

[GrahamM376]

One situation that can cause shouting is possibly when coming into harbour to a mooring.

To try and eliminate the need to be heard, swmbo and I have our own simple signals which ask for....
'go for'ard', 'go port', go starboard','stop', go astern' 'speed up' etc.. and similar for anchoring.
It saves an awful lot of risk to the boat and the need to shout.

We use the boat hook to point at the mooring once it gets too close to be seen from the helm and hand signals for slow, stop etc. Usually, the ones who shout the loudest are the least competent.

 

[dslittle]

Congratulations indeed... it's Ok by the way, normal service should be resumed soon enough if she's anything like me - I did mine last winter and I've already forgotten 80% of it!

My missus did her's and has commented more than once that it was a bad thing as now I 'think that she knows more than she does' !!!
The reality is that she is now confident/competent to do all of the things that I (still) normally do and she does the 'catering manageress' (her words not mine) stuff - especially after I dropped a fender overboard whilst she was bringing the boat in !!!
As another post alluded to, we are very lucky in that we do share our joy of sailing and work well together as a team. A fellow sailor on our pontoon has said more that once that he envies me as his wife will not go sailing with him...