What are posters' names or nicknames for various parts fitted to your boats. Apart from the obvious George for autohelm's I recently read a good one on the Stinkpot forum. Twin Volvo's names Bjorn and Benny!
My Autohelm is called "Koosie". Any South African will understand. My Cruising Chute is "Sara". Sad I know but all my crew (Wife and Kids) know exactly what I am talking about. They cannot plead ignorance
Evan the esky and Albert the Autopilot live on our boat. Albert has been a bit unreliable lately so nearby yachts have heard things like 'Where the f%^& are you going NOW Albert?' What f&**ing direction is THAT Albert?', 'NO Albert I don't want to f%$#ing gybe now!!' and looking mysteriously over to see where the other crew member is.
Evan the esky does a much better job. Evan keeps our beer very cold when he is told to without any arguments at all. Evan is NEVER sworn at as he is a very sensitive fellow and far too important to upset.
Evan and Albert don't get on very well though as Evan is usually fairly chilled out and relaxed and Albert is highly strung (or at least should be) so Evan lives in the starboard hull and Albert is in the port hull.
A Recent version of 'Treasure Island' from Hollywood has Long John Silver, Ben Gunn and Jim Hawkins setting off in Hispaniola for a life of piracy having shot everyone else (much more staisfactory ending than old Stevenson concocted, to my way of thinking)
'Right' says LJS 'Er - Ben, do I have to know the name of those things on the mast before we can use them?
'No', says Ben. 'Leastways, I dont think you do'
LJS 'OK then; Ben, Jim, lets put up those things up the front there on the mast, and see what happens...'
Now thats my kind of sailing..... but why does my better half ALWAYS insist on referring to mooring ropes as 'strings' , the anchor as 'that hook thing', and the sails as 'the laundry' in a loud voice whenever we visit Cowes or the Hamble?
If you really want to have fun, ask a boat salesman if you can have a look downstairs at the back bedroom. Then, when he's about 5 minutes into being patronising, ask him something technical, like the angle of vanishing stability, or what centres the hull/deck joint is bolted through at, or the number and diameter of the keel bolts, or the flow rate of the bilge pump.
You're right, DaveS calls his engines Bjorn and Benni, whereas I call my Volvo's "my Swedish girls", Anni-Frid and Agnetha. I reckon engines are female, not male. Once you start them up they go on and on, you have to spend hours and hours looking after them, stroking them, feeding them (oil changes etc), touching up their makeup, complementing them on how good they are and so on. Then the repay you by using up all your money. Definitely female, and what better names eh?
Agnetha's a different girl to Anni-Frid though. She's always first up in the morning, wants to go that bit further than Anni-Frid (100 revs more on WOT) and feels that little bit more responsive. She does though use a bit more fuel so is a bit of a boozer in my book. I do tell her off a bit when she's being too greedy though, but both my girls have always looked after me and never let me down..
Also brings a smile to people's faces when you tell em, "sorry can't go shopping this weekend, I'm going out with a couple of Swedish girls" and my wife doesn't mind. She thinks I'm a bit sad, but then I'll never understand women, apart from Agnetha and Anni-frid of course..
<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by coliholic on Sat Jan 19 11:27:17 2002 (server time).</FONT></P>