Impress the Grockles

[byron]

How many times have you been asked by non-boaters "Do you go far in your boat" I now say things like "sometimes I pop down to the Med" Now! this impresses the hell out of them and I am not telling Porkies either as all I have done is abbreviated the 'Medway' to the 'Med'
Anyone else got any similar abbreviations that can be used?

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[paulineb]

Tell them you're taking your boat to Kingston. That always impresses.

Pauline B

 

[hlb]

I'm sick of the question. We used to go to Ireland quite alot, from Wales, A trip of between 65 or 90 miles depending on destination. Once we went from Wales to Tobermoray on Mull in Scotland, which was a good few hundred miles.
All suitably un impressed. "Not been to France ugg! Why not the med" Then they point out, how easy it would be to just scoot down to the med and back for the week.
Replies get a bit tedious, Range, Tides, Cost, Up all night, Bay of Biscay.
Then they start shouting you down with over simplified things like. " Well the ferry only took X days." Then they walk away in disgust, mutering things like. " Well if I had a boat --------------"
The other one I get is. " why keep it in Plymouth. Why not Fleetwood, then we can all come and have a look"



Haydn

 

[claymore]

Had a friend in Wigan who used to take his narrow boat across to t'USA
(Uther Side of Accrington)

 

[BarryD]

Whilst running the engine on MVII on Sunday our neighbour asked...
"You going out then?"
"Nope probably going to remain here" was our answer.
"Strewth! In a little tub like that?" he exclaimed
"Uh???"

It turns out he's a tiny little bit deaf and thought we'd said we were going to Romaina! Yer right - the only way MVII goes further than 40 miles is in little bits of packing crate.

 

[Guest]

Re: Impress the boaties

get some charts of south pacific, or plot a course between various far-flung locations and set to active route.

 

[boatone]

Many moons ago in another life when I lived on the Hamble and played with raggie stickies my first boat was an 18' 6" Caprice which was followed a year or two later by a Hurley 22. Both were registered vessels and I must assume that the change of ownership notifications led to the letter from HM tax man which read something like.....Dear Sir, We note that you have purchased two yachts...........!!!
Needless to say the letter was framed for posterity ....not sure wots happened to it now tho!

TonyR
boatone@boatsontheweb.com

 

[Guest]

Re: you made that up!

still funny anyway. Much too funny for chichester, hence the suspicion...

 

[Guest]

Can remember few years back, sold boat inland at Newark, had a year finding right boat that just happened to be in Majorca.
Anyway we still had friends inland and visited from time to time.
One weekend talking to them, they were busy antifouling, polishing etc talking about a trip to Hull, Grimsby etc, asked me what we were doing,
" Probably taking a trip over to Minorca or Ibiza, depends which way the winds blowing" with that it all went quiet, no offence Neil C as I didn't know you then.

Paul js.

 

[ToMo]

Porkies!

Everybody knows that Tobermoray lives on Wimbledon Common!
;-)
TôMö

 

[Col]

Yep, I like that one.
How about USSR ( UTHER SIDE of STAINES RESERVOIR )

<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by Col on Mon Dec 10 19:47:43 2001 (server time).</FONT></P>

 

[byron]

Re: Porkies!

I thought that was a Swiss Chocolate didn't realise it came from SW19

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[Guest]

Back in the 80's we brought a rather splendid Sealine 22 Sport, equipped with Radar, from North Queensferry (Firth of Forth) by road to Benson, Oxon (River Thames). Once there, at Locks especially, we were often subjected to jibes from other craft and the occasional lockeeper too (sorry Jake!!) "What do you want the Radar for?... help you get under the bridges??" After a while I learnt the subtle art of deception too, My reply would be "No, not up here,....... but I do find Radar so useful when I'm down in the Estuary!!" We never took the boat down the Thames to the Estuary, but whilst I had been doing my RYA courses (in and around the estuary) I had found the Radar very useful, so I wasn't telling 'Porkies' either!!...... it certainlly wiped the smug grins from a few faces over the years!

<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by peterS on Mon Dec 10 20:33:04 2001 (server time).</FONT></P>

 

[BarryD]

Upon my life guvnor...

Its the truth! Jerry is not from Chichester he's from the East End he snuck in during free-flow and has tied his boat up with so many ropes that it's become a primary support for the pontoon.

 

[Will]

a couple of years ago when i ran a water taxi, I took the lines of a battered looking little sloop about 2 in the morning. It was a foul night, and was this boat's 3rd attempt at coming alongside. The lady on board was bedraggled but extremely grateful, and looked like she'd had a hard time. Upon asking me exactly where they had ended up, thinking that she was joking, I replied in French. At which point she burst into tears.
I've never felt like such a complete b*****d in all my life. I actually had to run her ashore in the taxi and point out a lloyd's bank and a fish & chip shop before she would take my word for it. It turned out that she and her husband had departed alderney the day before, bound for Plymouth, SW gales had blown up, engine defunct, compass dodgy, etc etc.

Needless to say I didn't charge her for the water taxi!!! And I presume that the boat was sold forthwith...