How to deal with helpful people?

[SvenH]

Today it happened again: A soon to be neighbor wanted to help us during tying up and stepped of his boat to take our dock line...
...which he then used to stop our boat, ruining our approach, resulting in a bump, luckily without damage.

How to deal with these inherently friendly but useless people?
Do you shout "thanks but no thanks" at the top of your lungs, so they will hear it?
Ignore them?

Even when solo I'd rather be without help and go my own way, but this is a concept that half of boaters do not seem to comprehend?

 

[Clancy Moped]

You tell them you have to learn and manage with the crew you have on board at the time, as the time will come when no one will be on hand to help. Edit with a smile.

 

[Refueler]

I know exactly what you mean ...

Ryde IoW .... I have last line looped back - I am about to use that to let me pivot boat so I can extricate from a line of boats along the pontoon .. woman trots along and throws the line off without even asking me ... to the words - "There you go" ......

Completely ruining the plan .. I quickly jump fwd to re-attach the line - twisting my ankle badly ... before boat drifts back into boat astern ...

She then stood there with stupid look on her face ....

 

[geem]

We don't pass lines to anybody. Unless it's the harbour master

 

[Stingo]

"Can I help"
"Yeh, put your hands in your pockets and leave them there"

 

[Robih]

We don't pass lines to anybody. Unless it's the harbour master

Certainly not when it’s the harbour master/dockie. They seem to be specialists in cleating off the bow line half way down the finger pontoon, then you’re completed knackered and the stern swings away from the berth and if you’re unlucky clouts the boat moored adjacent.

 

[PaulRainbow]

We always ask if they would like someone to catch a line, a lot do and we're happy to help, others say "no thanks". We usually say, "no thanks we need the practice".

 

[billyfish]

Just say no.

 

[Pump-Out]

"That's kind. We have a plan, but perhaps you could standby a mo should it go wrong."

That way you have been polite, not committed to the instant spring, but neither have you dismissed the person should you need them on another occasion.

 

[PeterV]

I’m balancing the dinghy over my head, just about to put it on the roof rack. “ Let me help” says a passing dinghy sailor then instantly pushes one end up so that the other end goes down sharply and puts a sizeable dent in the corner of the car’s roof.

 

[Sandy]

I always ask if people want assistance.

When onboard I keep a short spare line to pass to a willing helper - with an instruction to make fast on a pontoon cleat I am not planning to use. Once I'm made fast I collect the end of the line from them and pop it on the midships cleat and ask when the bar opens. Works every time.

 

[johnalison]

I wish I’d been given a £10 token at the chandlers’ for every time either I or my wife have shouted “Take a turn “ to some idiot who thought he/she could hold our boat up against a F6 blowing off the pontoon. I don’t think that we have ever actually ended up with damage as a result, but it can be a bit peevifying. On the other hand, my efforts on behalf of other yachts attempting to tie up have been masterpieces of applied physics in the face of total incompetence from the people on board. My wife rushed to take the lines of an HR 62 in Stralsund, which was pretty ambitious of her, but all went well and the young Swedish couple on board with two children were apparently quite grateful.

 

[mikegunn]

If I’m sailing solo I quite enjoy the challenge of making a successful berthing. However, if some well meaning soul decides to proffer assistance with the procedure I’m usually not too proud to accept, because once I have a line ashore I’m not going anywhere anyway. I can then tidy up the lines at my leisure. They’ll leave with a warm glow of satisfaction but if it’s all gone horribly wrong I can at least point a finger of accusation in their direction.

Mike.

 

[rich]

Last summer we arrived at Granville marina on a friend’s 60ft catamaran, marina attendant gave us a berth directly opposite the entrance sill, I was on the starboard bow I lassoed the cleat perfect,pull back on port engine ,then some idiot took my line Off the cleat !

 

[Frayed Knot]

I think only once has a willing “helper” actually caused us problems (on that occasion spectacularly so)
I’m always happy to accept, and offer, assistance. It’s just a friendly, sociable thing to do and often leads to a chat and a shared drink.
I’ll carry on taking the risk.

 

[Bouba]

I will usually offer to help....but I take my cue from those onboard...unless it looks like an inexperienced crew, which is often the case....I have been thrown both ends of the rope

 

[Pye_End]

When singlehanded, somebody grabbing the bow is often helpful when bow on. When trying to get alongside with a fresh breeze taking you off, some help can be essential.

Usually have a plan, and usually works, but often see passers by who would make life much easier if they stopped for a few seconds.

 

[jtfield]

The RNYM dude's advice is: throw them a line with a loop at the end. Most likely they will put it over a cleat. You retain control of the tension.

 

[Frayed Knot]

The RNYM dude's advice is: throw them a line with a loop at the end. Most likely they will put it over a cleat. You retain control of the tension.

Good advice - it keeps everyone happy If I could just remember to tie the loop first…

 

[ylop]

wanted to help us during tying up and stepped of his boat to take our dock line...
...which he then used to stop our boat, ruining our approach, resulting in a bump, luckily without damage.

How to deal with these inherently friendly but useless people?
Do you shout "thanks but no thanks" at the top of your lungs, so they will hear it?
Ignore them?

You give them clear, unambiguous instructions - not:

“Take a turn “ to some idiot

Which assumes some sort of nautical language background…

As we left our berth on Sat morning our neighbour commented that we obviously weren’t doing it right - there was nowhere near enough shouting!