All our Yesterdays

[claymore]

My God, I remember when I was Captain of a whaling ship, boundout from Leith to Torshaven in the Faeroe Islands. It was blowing something like a choppy force 17 at the time and I was standing in my rightful place at the Bow (front) of the ship, defying God and the elements to put me under. I turned round to my starboard (right) and saw the crew being sick over the side. I said "Come on chaps" (Called them 'Chaps', good for morale and by God they loved me for it) "Come on Chaps, lets all heave to - sorry chaps, bad turn of phrase - lets all pull together and we'll get to Torshaven if its the last thing we do." Well, the chaps responded splendidly and we made it on wings and prayers and a breeze that had died to 27 rectums.
Life just doesn't seem the same nowadays.

 

[tcm]

Ah, claymore made a good skipper. I knew him as a fresh-faced cabin boy on an Thames lighter, where I was Petty Liar. Claymore's job was to go and fetch phrases and words for me to use, which would be carefully assembled to make up almost-real-sounding sea stories. We built up quite collection, including:

"goodwin graveyard" "rusty harpoon which he always carried with him" "ripped his arm staright off" "dashed on the rocks like a wet rag" "left him dead with his legs wrapped around the rudder of the other ship" "dead three days" "jacobite doubloon" "3inches under the keel" "eerie fog that so thick a man couldn't even see his own hands" "mencing waves the like of which had ne'er been seen" "horizontal sleet cut the sail to ribbons" "broken compass" "round his neck" "not a soul on board, and even the cat had had its throat cut" "waves sent from the mouth of Hell itself" "only one eye and a gash across his face" ."remained to tell the tale" ..

 

[DepSol]

I think winter has been too long for some!

 

[ToMo]

Good grief what are they on?....I hope you haven't been dosing them up with that fancy stuff you keep on about! Soulison or something - well they are certainly waxing lyrical from the soul.....or is it up the other end.....!!!
TôMö

 

[byron]

I remember a torpedo taking away our propellor when on the Murmansk Convoy in 1941. "No worries" I shouted and dived over the side, I got behind that Freighter and swam pushing her ahead of me all the way to Russia.

ô¿ô

 

[DepSol]

Dont know what they are on but I think they have been sharing it with Byron!

Must be some good sh1t as they have really lost the plot.

Dom

 

[claymore]

Byron
Are you my brother Sylvest?

 

[claymore]

You forgot

Seven years on a bucking foredeck. I remember that one well - you'd just asked to be lashed to the tiller and wished me God Speed, I looked at you kindly, in a stern manly fashion and asked how you'd come by those dreadful scars.

 

[claymore]

I think its recognised medically as SAD syndrome.

 

[paulineb]

Re: You forgot

Those dreadful scars were caused by splinters which became infected after having spent too much time on the Good Ship Venus with his arse against the mast

Pxx

 

[claymore]

Re: You forgot

Were you not the figurehead on that noble craft Pauline?

 

[paulineb]

Re: You forgot

Do you know, as soon as I clicked the bloody submit button I just KNEW that someone would come back with a reply along those lines - and you didn't disappoint JS ;-)

Pxx

 

[Guest]

Re: You forgot

ah, but who was the masthead?

 

[claymore]

Re: You forgot

Funny old world innit?
PS I'm looking for the BIGGER button on your picture at the moment - those drawers seem a little.....grubby?

 

[paulineb]

Re: You forgot

They're not grubby - they're lilac lace

Pxx

 

[claymore]

Re: You forgot

Don't they itch?

 

[paulineb]

Re: You forgot

Nope

Pxx

 

[claymore]

Re: You forgot

Hmm, must get a pair - not sure about lilac though - do they do a crushed cranberry?
jsx

 

[paulineb]

Re: You forgot

No, but i believe you can get crushed nuts

Pxx

 

[claymore]

touche.nm.

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