Women Skippers

[rotrax]

Nither First Mate or I had any previous experience of sailing. Boating, rivers and canals, but not on the Ocean.

After training, boat sharing, then becoming sole owners and doing further training-up to Coastal Yachtmaster level-we are a team.

We know each others strengths and weaknesses, use them positively and have averaged 2,000 NM's for the last ten years on our 4 to 5 month summer cruises. Many overnight passages with 3 hour watch changes.

From personal observation of fellow sailor husband and wife teams we agree that it is often the wife who says they are not able to steer the boat or take charge.

Perhaps focused training with a separate party might give confidence.

Because ladies who DO get on the wheel and in charge of a sailing boat invariably do it very well.

Just sayin..................................

 

[Daydream believer]

Yeah... And you're still coming across as distinctly out of touch...

I know a number of sailing couples where the wife is the one who grew up sailing, and the husband is the one who's come to it later in life. Zero arguments there who's in charge. When I think of my own crew, the list of those who I truly trust with the boat, that I'm happy to say "sure, take the boat and do that race" or deliver it hundreds of miles offshore... There's more women on that list than men.

Look I asked the question. Surely that is OK. I was given examples that were irrelevant to my question ie PIP Hare etc are professional sailors not part of a husband & wife weekend team. So I pointed that out
I still wonder if the women that you refer to are relevant to the couples I see at the marina - typically one with a dicky knee etc- sitting in their boats chatting & wondering whether to go out or not
But never mind, do these fit young women you meet really meet the criteria of the married couples I spoke about?

 

[Daydream believer]

Nither First Mate or I had any previous experience of sailing. Boating, rivers and canals, but not on the Ocean.

After training, boat sharing, then becoming sole owners and doing further training-up to Coastal Yachtmaster level-we are a team.

We know each others strengths and weaknesses, use them positively and have averaged 2,000 NM's for the last ten years on our 4 to 5 month summer cruises. Many overnight passages with 3 hour watch changes.

From personal observation of fellow sailor husband and wife teams we agree that it is often the wife who says they are not able to steer the boat or take charge.

Perhaps focused training with a separate party might give confidence.

Because ladies who DO get on the wheel and in charge of a sailing boat invariably do it very well.

Just sayin..................................

But my question was- When the chips are down who really takes command?

 

[Wansworth]

But my question was- When the chips are down who really takes command?

Well my wife leaves cooking the chips to me…does that help

 

[john_morris_uk]

My wife wouldn't sail solo but she has no problem standing watch day or night while I catch up on sleep.

Ditto.

 

[Daydream believer]

Well my wife leaves cooking the chips to me…does that help

And the battered Haddock- Don't tell me that she runs to the chippy & gets that whilst you do the chips.
Who deals with the pickled onion.
You cannot have fish & chips without a pickled onoin

 

[Wansworth]

Whilst my father was lashed to the sheetwinch in the cockpit she took their boat across the channel with my help…..once in Cherbourg he recovered his wish to live

 

[Wansworth]

And the battered Haddock- Don't tell me that she runs to the chippy & gets that whilst you do the chips.
Who deals with the pickled onion.
You cannot have fish & chips without a pickled onoin

It wasn’t literal

 

[Daydream believer]

It wasn’t literal

So you lied about the chips
Makes me wonder about the boat now

 

[Wansworth]

So you lied about the chips
Makes me wonder about the boat now

No but we’re I live there is no such thing as as a fish and chip shop maybe in Madrid but I doubt it at least not with pickled onions.Its a holiday here today so splitting logs and have little time to rebut you insinuating comment on my boat owning credentials!

 

[flaming]

Look I asked the question. Surely that is OK. I was given examples that were irrelevant to my question ie PIP Hare etc are professional sailors not part of a husband & wife weekend team. So I pointed that out
I still wonder if the women that you refer to are relevant to the couples I see at the marina - typically one with a dicky knee etc- sitting in their boats chatting & wondering whether to go out or not
But never mind, do these fit young women you meet really meet the criteria of the married couples I spoke about?

They're not all fit young women by any stretch. I know a lot of couples who are the high side of 50 who sail together, and I'd say that roughly half of them are very definitely led by the woman on the boat, and she would be in charge whether the chips are up, down or sideways.

Indeed I also know one couple who split up precisely because he had the temerity to try and take charge when they were sailing on her boat, that she owned before they met and that she was far, far more qualified and experienced to skipper. Told her everything she needed to know about the bloke.

 

[Blueboatman]

MauriceGriffith had a wife who sailed her own boat too iirc.
(By iirc I mean wot I read in one of his books)

 

[Wansworth]

MauriceGriffith had a wife who sailed her own boat too iirc.
(By iirc I mean wot I read in one of his books)

Your correct,she liked the open waters whilst he preferred the swatchways

 

[Daydream believer]

Your correct,she liked the open waters whilst he preferred the swatchways

Yes . Did she get a bit worried when seeing a few sand banks & narrow channels with little room to manouver
I knew a couple who had sailed round the world in a steel 40ft boat. When they returned they bought a Centaur & she was absolutely scared of any boat coming near. A club trip to Brightlingsea meant they had to be watched with care. Especialy when the rammed our HMs boat & damaged his self steering. She was a nightmare & he was little better.
The boat had wobbly keels & they could hear them clonking when on the mooring. They solved it though & the boat was very well tarted up. Her painting skills were beyond doubt. Part of skills probably honed on the 4 year circumnavigation
But no recogniseable clues about close in sailing ability

 

[Wansworth]

Yes some women get a bit worried when they see a few sand banks & narrow channels with little roo to manouver

If you read Maurice Griffiths books he explains their different choices of boat…..your being mysogenist is to day

 

[Sea Change]

I'm late to this thread but will chip in with our own experience.
I had a bit of a head start on SMWBO, having done a bit of dinghy sailing as a kid, and then some more as an adult. She never liked it that much, but when we got a yacht she jumped in with both feet and actually got ahead of me on things like chart work and using the radio. It helped that her work at the time was willing to put her through some training.
I then started working on boats commercially, and the advantage went back to me. She's still better on the admin side of stuff, interrogating GRIBs and check in procedures for different countries. I have a more intuitive approach to anything involving ropes, because of spending years doing it.
In especially tight situations I might take the helm, but 90% of the time it's her. I'm much more suited to hauling up anchors and getting fenders out.

The commonest thing we see is a big burly guy at the wheel, screaming instructions from the back of the boat, at his much smaller wife who is struggling with the manual labour jobs- anchor, fenders, warps. Makes no sense.

 

[Bouba]

The commonest thing we see is a big burly guy at the wheel, screaming instructions from the back of the boat, at his much smaller wife who is struggling with the manual labour jobs- anchor, fenders, warps. Makes no sense.

I agree ......it’s mostly (98%) men at the helm, women with boat hooks. But the truth is, it’s hard to switch....and I don’t think it’s the men (most of the time) at fault....very few women want the conn .....but the ones I do see are often very impressive

 

[Sea Change]

I agree ......it’s mostly (98%) men at the helm, women with boat hooks. But the truth is, it’s hard to switch....and I don’t think it’s the men (most of the time) at fault....very few women want the conn .....but the ones I do see are often very impressive

SWMBO learned to drive several years before I did, and is generally a better and more cautious driver, who enjoys it more, so I'm quite used to her taking the wheel. The only times I take over on the boat are in tricky situations where my years of powerboating experience comes in handy.

 

[RunAgroundHard]

Is it not a bit of a cliche about men steering and shouting at woman as they crew?

As far as I can tell, there are a lot of family, partner crews who work well together, based on my marina observations.

There is one very old couple on my row, and he gets a regular tongue lashing as she is sprightly and he is doddery, but stubborn. They are a nice couple and and like a good laugh. About 20 boats, all couples, families and no stress or hassle that I see as they come and go.

 

[Bouba]

Is it not a bit of a cliche about men steering and shouting at woman as they crew?

As far as I can tell, there are a lot of family, partner crews who work well together, based on my marina observations.

There is one very old couple on my row, and he gets a regular tongue lashing as she is sprightly and he is doddery, but stubborn. They are a nice couple and and like a good laugh. About 20 boats, all couples, families and no stress or hassle that I see as they come and go.

We have a rule...I am captain...and can say what I like how I like....but once the engine is turned off... I revert to victim