Radio Checks .. Policing by ridicule

[jimi]

Wonder what the reaction from Solent CG would be if after every radio check there was another one along the lines of:

Caller:"Solent Cg,Solent,CG,Solent CG this is YetAnotherDick,YetAnotherDick,YetAnotherDick"
Solent CG "YetAnotherDick,YetAnotherDick,YetAnotherDick this is Solent CG"
Caller: "SOlent CG, this is YetAnotherDick, Radio check mate"
Solent CG " ? "

 

[Cutter]

Are you VERY bored today?! or has the nuthouse had an outing?

 

[jimi]

So you do'nt think its a good idea?

Pity I had a vision of the checkers being laughed to silence

 

[Superstrath]

Some of them bring auto-ridicule. Heard the boat behind us in a marina shouting for a radio check - we recognised the name so turned to look straight into his cockpit - when he got his result from the CG transmitting aerial all of 500 yards away he said, "Thanks very much, Cheerio for now!"
Then noticed half the marina looking at him incredulously.

My advice - if you really need to do it, use a made-up name. I quite like yours!


Alistair

 

[Cutter]

Its good - was visiting cg and impressed by their ongoing politeness in the face of so many cretins (funny how we regard them as cretins - they cant all be bav drivers can they?! - or stinkies). The cg were unfailingly polite until the finger came off the transmit button when some hilarious responses were forthcoming.
If the (nb) phone rings how do you answer it - " Battersea Dogs Home " is a bit passe -
"AIDS Confidentail Help Line - how may we help you?" normally silences them. Anyone any other favourites?

 

[Rowana]

Answering the phone -

"War Office. Do you want a fight?"

Talking of phones, my way of handling double glazing, kichens etc. a few years ago was to hand my eldest daughter the phone. When she was about three, she would chatter away for hours to anyone. Backfired on me though - Once she became a teenager, I couldn't get her off the bloody phone! She moved into a flat with her friend at christmas time, so hopefully the bill will reduce! ! /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif

 

[clouty]

Re: Answering the phone -

To get rid of DG and kitchen salespeople. just say "But I rent this house" They're gone! /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[Rowana]

Re: Answering the phone -

Well actually, now we are registered with the telephone preference service, and are ex-directory. This has reduced the crap to an absolute trickle. The ones I do get, I ask the name of the company, and how they got this mumber, and tell them it's ex-directory, registered with TPS, and if I get any more calls from them "I will prosecute them to the full extent of the law". I don't know if this means anything, but it certainly makes me feel better!

 

[ParaHandy]

Re: Answering the phone -

apparently, this is true. last christmas, the home office phones were switched to the answerphone and one extension gave the message that "all government on holiday. if you are a terrorist intent upon attack, please leave message after the beep"

 

[Danny_Labrador]

Lift receiver…..”city morgue …. you stab em, we slab em”

Usually get rid of them!

 

[graham]

"Yacht loud mouth"this is ______ Coast guard we receive you too loud and too often .

 

[jac]

Cold callers - best response is to try and convince them you're a religious nutter. Say you would never buy double glazing because Jesus didn't need it - ask them if they pray for forgiveness for their sins otherwise they will be condemned forever to the fires of hell. They usually hang up round this point.

 

[Becky]

Hasn't anyone tried 'No thank you'. That works for me. Quick too

 

[Deleted member 478]

[ QUOTE ]
Hasn't anyone tried 'No thank you'. That works for me. Quick too

[/ QUOTE ]
Where is the fun in that?

 

[fireball]

How often do you radio check then?
We did once with SCG last season, the rest of the time with a local station.

 

[Koeketiene]

Why do you check at all? If your radio worked OK when you switched it off last, what leads you to believe that it won't work when you switch it on next?

 

[brownsox]

As brand new sailors with a "new" MAB (been reading the forums) we have the licences, and the radio, but have never used it yet.
Will be scared to death of seeming like YetAnotherDick by doing a check!But how else do you know it's all working OK?
Maybe we'll just try to find a friend with a boat that we can call??

 

[jimi]

Sure you'll check it soon enough calling up a marina.

 

[sailorman]

NEVER EVER DONE ONE WITH C.G. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[fireball]

I've had years of checking handhelds->base station for club patrol boats - they do sometimes fail - I had one fail weekend before last, and the battery was charged - luckily we had another one.

On our boat I don't do a radio check as such - just blip the trigger to make sure it is transmitting (listen on the handheld) - finding out it doesn't work when you need it is too late IMO!
Hearing others checking with CG all the time does get annoying though ...

Wouldn't a distance transmition or one that can be measured in some shape or form be recommended at timely intervals? The problem then is who do you use ... if your in a marina then you can call the marina office, but if you don't have that facility then your either relying on a friend or your local CG.
Your VHF may transmit fine for 5 miles or so, but you need to know if it has good power/range - just not checking every time you drop mooring!