Ra United Nashuns charter

Re: I thought ...

nah......he's alive & well & living in South Stoke....believe me...he's a poster on the ither side d'ye ken.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00>http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/h00</A>
 
och they're at skil. Ah'm plunkin aff tae dae same o' yon sailin' wi' Maggie Broon. Ah've chartered a boacht fae Sunsail at Largs and Ah'm aff tae Americay tae see yon Injuns the noo. Ah've goat tae be back fur ma tea or ah'll get ma arse tanned.

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Re: I will take my custom elsewhere

Welsh whisky - whitthefecks tha?
Have tae admit tae being partial tae ra Bush though - Black that is - no Geedubya

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
/forums/images/icons/smile.gif
 
The thing about wearing a kilt...

...is that everyone can see your legs trembling with rage.

>Welsh whisky - <A target="_blank" HREF=http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/739505.stm>whitthefecks tha?</A><

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.writeforweb.com/twister1>Let's Twist Again</A>
 
Re: Remember the Worcester!

Mirelle - ther's a time when we haf tae consider bygones being bygones. Noo, I like youse, I've always liked youse, sae ah'm goin tae be easy on youse. Bringin' up a wee incident like this is jest not on. Think o ra benefit tae yer English diet ther's bin... 'cos apparently when the tale travelled back sooth - nae doot exaggerated by they Geordies (Scots wi lobotomys) Yer english Monak wiz eatin his bridie an' he uttered the words " The Worcester.......Sauce" Noo as luck wid haf et - he'd a bit broon stuff on ra side o his plate an his courtiers - bein fu' o respec an' a' that - thocht he'd jest' made up a name fer the broon stuff an hence its bin ca'd that tae this day. So dye, see... ther's a silver linin' here?

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
/forums/images/icons/smile.gif
 
Re: The thing about wearing a kilt...

Kenny - they japs did this some time ago - brought a whole new meaning tae the expression a 'Nip' I remember.
An the advantage tae wearing a kilt is that ye dinnae get skiddies in yer trollies

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
/forums/images/icons/smile.gif
 
Michty ... michty .... michty me
ne'er mind yon sausage Cumberland ...? ah mean tae sae that there jist are sae mony peeple ken that ra sassenachs shud be gratefool to us fer, ye no think? Ah mean tae say we goat rid o' yon blair an brown bampots and ra daft ijiots wen' and put thon in charge orra whole shebang ... orra revenge is sweet, d'you no think ..

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Para - yince mair -ra grasp youse has is chust sublime!
Nae wunner a' dinnae need tae fret aboot ma penshun.

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
/forums/images/icons/smile.gif
 
Re: Remember the Worcester!

Fareweel to a' our Scottish fame,
Fareweel our ancient glory;
Fareweel ev'n to the Scottish name,
Sae fam'd in martial story.
Now Sark rins over Solway sands,
An' Tweed rins to the ocean,
To mark where England's province stands-
Such a parcel of rogues in a nation!

What force or guile could not subdue,
Thro' many warlike ages,
Is wrought now by a coward few,
For hireling traitor's wages.
The English stell we could disdain,
Secure in valour's station;
But English gold has been our bane-
Such a parcel of rogues in a nation!

O would, or I had seen the day
That Treason thus could sell us,
My auld grey head had lien in clay,
Wi' Bruce and loyal Wallace!
But pith and power, till my last hour,
I'll mak this declaration;
We're bought and sold for English gold-
Such a parcel of rogues in a nation!

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Re: Remember the Worcester!

he'll be passing his titfer roond in jist a minute .................

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Epistle To Parahandy

In this strange land, this uncouth clime,
A land unknown to prose or rhyme;
Where words ne'er cross't the Muse's heckles,
Nor limpit in poetic shackles:
A land that Prose did never view it,
Except when drunk he stacher't thro' it;
Here, ambush'd by the chimla cheek,
Hid in an atmosphere of reek,
I hear a wheel thrum i' the neuk,
I hear it-for in vain I leuk.
The holding tank gleams, a fiery kernel,
Enhusked by a fog infernal:
Here, for my wonted rhyming raptures,
I sit and count my sins by chapters;
For life and spunk like ither Christians,
I'm dwindled down to mere existence,
Wi' nae converse but Sassenach bodies,
Wi' nae kenn'd face but ma dug Bonnie,
Bonnie, my Labradorian pride!
Dowie she saunters down the Avon side,
And aye a westlin leuk she throws,
While tears hap o'er her auld black nose!
Was it for this, wi' cannie care,
Thou bure the Bard through many a sea?
At howes, or wave crests never stumbled,
And late or early never grumbled?-
O had I power like inclination,
I'd heeze thee up a constellation,
To canter with the Sagitarre,
Or loup the ecliptic like a bar;
Or turn the pole like any arrow;
Or, when auld Phoebus bids good-morrow,
Down the zodiac urge the race,
And cast dirt on his godship's face;
For I could lay my bread and kail
He'd ne'er cast saut upo' thy tail. -
Wi' a' this care and a' this grief,
And sma', sma' prospect of relief,
And nought but bog reek i' my head,
How can I write what ye can read?-
Perhaps in Poole, twenty-eighth o' June,
Ye'll find me in a better tune;
But till we meet and weet our whistle,
Tak this excuse for nae epistle

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Hie thee hence immediately...

...to the Serious Burns Unit.

PS was there ever such a dull and worthy poet? Well probably, but they been allowed to fade into obscurity, unlike RB.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.writeforweb.com/twister1>Let's Twist Again</A>
 
Re: Hie thee hence immediately...

I sat upon a cigarette
I bear the marks upon me yet
Burns

<hr width=100% size=1>regards
Claymore
/forums/images/icons/smile.gif
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Share this page

Top