Picture hanging

[Piers]

Anyone know how to hang a picture in a boat without using those brass fittings with eyes that you can see when the picture is hung?

<hr width=100% size=1>Piers du Pré
www.playdeau.com
www.dupre.co.uk

 

[byron]

<font color=blue>I thought hanging was abolished except for the crimes of being a Traitor or setting fire to a Naval Dockyard.
Ho Hum. Take the picture out of the frame, put your six inch nails through each corner, put the picture back in.

<hr width=100% size=1>http://www.alexander-advertising.co.uk

 

[jfm]

Massive velcro?

Slots in side of frame, running in the direction of the depth of the frame, then fastened to the bulkhead you have two tabs sticking out with a hole in them (like a small corner mending bracket, in thin steel plate) then put picture up so tabs go into slots in frame, then insert screws into edge of frame, and screws pass thru hole in tab

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[tcm]

http://www.system-marketing.co.uk/index.shtml seems to have lots of decent options. This is yet another post where the raggies will have a go. But anyway, has anyone else had problems with smashing wine glasses when you set off without first emptying the dishwasher?

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[jfm]

Re: Picture hanging - electronic solution

Forget picture frames. Scan the pictures, store on hard drive, then display on plasma cinema screen. You can then change picture to suit mood. Turners when in Solent, Picassos in SofF, Canalettos in Italy, Rodriguezs in Spain, Kylie when the lads are on board, etc

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[tcm]

Re: reverting to type

This is a totally crap idea dreamed up by a electronicks junkie, imho. Worst of all of course, one then needs to hang up a flippin plasma screen that proabably says SONY or TOSHIBA under it, instead of just a piccie in a nice frame. Or are there any plasma screens with nice arty goldleaf frames? No, there aren't.

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[Guest]

I use a very powerful D/sided adhesive tape so strong a hurricane wouldn`t shift it. trouble is if you want to remove frame abandon ship immediately after as sure to hole the vessel

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[iangrant]

This is almost too good to miss - but I'll attempt to use some restraint

What is the picture of?

Anyway, put the picture hangers in the same bin as the "welcome aboard" doormat on the jetty, the little captains hat with the gold anchor, the flowers and flower vases and ....

head down now and retire back to the sailing bits.. sorry

Ian

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[tcm]

Well, seeing as its Piers I spect it's an original and very classy, possibly a Goya. Hah! Very expensive and not in the least little bit raggiefied.

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[jfm]

Artistic electronics - every Fleming shd have one

Peasant tcm! Have you not seen <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.solarshadingsys.com/sss01/products/images/brochure-visionart.pdf> these</A>?

 

[tcm]

Re: ah but

Hmm! I am evidently way behind the times.

BUT...i did once have a telly that was up on the wall like this and it was blimmin useless as you almost break your neck - tellies should be near the floor. So, another elegant near miss which will not tempt me. Unlike the genuine fake old master painter to whom I gave blimmin 400 euros and promptly disappeared after closing his shop in Paris, the git.




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[jfm]

only in america

Quite agree. Would get crick in neck or have to watch TV standing up. So I've ordered one, will have massive (spoof) neck injuries in 4 months, and sue for $10mill! They're in Calif so they'll think that's cheap. Much more useful investment than €400 in a Paris art dealer.

Anyway, what Piers needs to know is do they do a 24 model?

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[MedDreamer]

No

By the time we are underway my dishwasher is usually sat snugly in the cockpit with a wine glass in her hand.

What a lifestyle you highly rewarded journo's enjoy, if only Tom would take me up on my "The View from Windermere" concept

<hr width=100% size=1>Martyn

 

[MedDreamer]

Re: reverting to type

You are right about the source of this idea.

The first time I heard of it, a Mr Bill Gates of Seattle WA was planning on doing this throughout his very expensive mansion.

Seriously even with the best plasma screen it would look rubbish. Screens radiate their picture, where paintings relect the light and you can only get the subtlety from the real thing (quite arty farty for a Bayliner owner dont you think). And I know you were saying it tounge in cheek JFM.



<hr width=100% size=1>Martyn

 

[MedDreamer]

Re: Artistic electronics - every Fleming shd have one

Very Impressive but do we have to have Tony Bennett

<hr width=100% size=1>Martyn

 

[jimi]

Well of course you lot need to add some art and subtlety in some form to your otherwise crude,noisy and unpleasant form of boating. Us raggies can however relax, lie back and admire the smooth curvaceous lines of our swelling sails. And of course, like much of life and sex, its not the destination thats important, its the means and vehicle of transport that's important! We do'nt need pictures, we sail 'em!

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[tcm]

Lake District Ramble

Meddreamer was bimbling about in his boat, in Windermere. Which is very close to Sawrey, where Beatrix Potter lived. It began to rain.

Splish splosh splash! Across the shallow pebbly beach splashed Desdemona Merrifeather the Duck wearing her very best apron. Meddreamer immediately started taking pot shots at her with small stones. Cos there was very little to do on a boat in Windermere other than say "Look, that's Orrest Head, which is the first hill that Wainwright ever climbed, in 1935" or "No, it isn't, that's Loughrigg you wassock, Orrest Head is over there, just to the north east of the town, and it was 1934, not 1935!" or "Look, I've been coming here for bloody years, you moron, I think I know the difference between Orrest Head and Loughrigg!" Just then it began to rain.

"Will you two please stop arguing and STOP throwing stones!" squawked Desdemona MerriFeather, as Medreamer caught her with a decent wallop round the neck. She was hurrying off home for afternnon tea with several other small furry or feathered animals all with somewhat unlikely and extremely androgenous names and social lives. Of course, in real life she probably spent the entire time trying to have a crap on somebody's expensive boat cover, because boat covers are nice and warm, much more comfortale that those horrid reeds up beyond Ambleside.

"Look at that, a talking duck!" said tcm. "That's nothing" said meddreamer "all the small animals round here can talk, and usually with a southern accent too! But I am doing my best to ignore their upper-crust concerns and mannerisms, and have bought a load of traps to set on the beach at belle isle and elswhere"

"Oh my ears and whiskers" said Montgomery the Mouse, from inside the saloon of meddreamers boat. "Shut Up or I will set the Cat on you" said meddreamer. "Also, you are not called Montgomery the Mouse, you are just a blimmin mouse"

Then after a few more watercoloured drawings, something pretty gruesome happened that sounded okay if you were grown up, but was actually a bit shocking or worrying if you were aged six or seven, perhaps like one of the cats getting rolled up in pastry and put in a pie. Erk. Unsuprisingly, the most interesting things on Windermere actually happened in Beatrix Potter's imagination . Suddenly, it began to rain for the third time in the same story.





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[tcm]

Re: reverting to type

indeed. But at least the inventors of this shite idea have put some rolling printed picture in front, so improving on jfm's otherwise awful-looking mark 1 plasma display.

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[MedDreamer]

Re: Lake District Ramble

Oh Bugger.

There goes my first column - can I claim plaglrism?

In next months MBY - I head for the south of lake and a whole new set of furry friends - wait..... who's that in the small sailing dinghys.........why its Titty and the other Swallows and Amazons....A evil smirk comes across Meddreamers face, months of suppressed feelings about the introduction of the speed limit flood his mind. He pushes the throttle control forward as far as it will go and just as the shout of "boom coming over" eminates from the skull and crossbones flagged dinghy, Meddreamer cuts in front of them and swamps the little b......beauties.

"Now now" says Jeremy the Lake Warden (who used to be a duck) that was a bit naughty, I hope you are going to apologise to those poor simple raggies, they do'nt even have dishwashers or hang paintings in their cabins.

Suddenly Pauline entered wearing nothing but a slinky, see-through...........oops sorry wrong magazine


<hr width=100% size=1>Martyn

 

[tcm]

Re: Lake District Ramble

The simple pleasures of life? - or a disturbing comment on misuse of the Internet? The zenith of post-modern story-telling? - or just an badly written rubbish by some berk with a nasty voice and a bunged-up nose? We've all got out own theories about that nerk Melvyn Bragg, who also lives in the Lake District, and drones on boringly on radio 4, or at least he did until he got chucked out recently.



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