Oh ffs: I really didn't want to do that

Our weekend boating was cancelled due to the weather - however even though I ended up catching up on stuff around the house - it could have been far worse and was tame by comparison.! Nice one Jimmy - brilliant write up and glad all was resolved. :-)
 
Brilliant story! Can relate totally - SWMBO also went swimming in Cala D'Or the weekend before last, albeit unintentionally. She thought our new passarelle was a diving board apparently. Very lucky she aimed for the gap between the boats. New iphone later and all is fine :-)
 
Brilliant story! Can relate totally - SWMBO also went swimming in Cala D'Or the weekend before last, albeit unintentionally. She thought our new passarelle was a diving board apparently. Very lucky she aimed for the gap between the boats. New iphone later and all is fine :-)

Been there got the iPhone T shirt.

Went to boat - kids getting out of taxi with mum. Splash. I jumped onto the bathing platform just as the boat moved and put tension on the cross lines - which rose - which caught my foot. Ouch !

Went to the Apple store. Phone not working. They open in. Its got wet. Me - really - no idea how that happened. Clearly they here that 10 times a day so £169 later I emerge with a new phone.

The joys of boating.

Well done Jimmy - finding the keys was a huge achievement!
 
Been there got the iPhone T shirt.

Went to boat - kids getting out of taxi with mum. Splash. I jumped onto the bathing platform just as the boat moved and put tension on the cross lines - which rose - which caught my foot. Ouch !

Went to the Apple store. Phone not working. They open in. Its got wet. Me - really - no idea how that happened. Clearly they here that 10 times a day so £169 later I emerge with a new phone.

The joys of boating.

Well done Jimmy - finding the keys was a huge achievement!
Where did you get an iPhone for £169?
 
breakfast at 2pm on Sunday,
Mmm, Saturday night must have been quite some night;)

I take it the keys weren't of the much hated 'keyless' variety otherwise I suspect you'd still be trying to start the scooter now

PS what's a financier cake? Something that tastes disappointing, leaves a bad after taste and for which the bill is always far bigger than you thought?:D
 
Mmm, Saturday night must have been quite some night;)

I take it the keys weren't of the much hated 'keyless' variety otherwise I suspect you'd still be trying to start the scooter now

PS what's a financier cake? Something that tastes disappointing, leaves a bad after taste and for which the bill is always far bigger than you thought?:D

It won't be the financier that's liquidising matters...

In the immortal words of Mr Ian Dury: "if you go swimming in the shitus, you'll get more than dermatitis"
 
Where did you get an iPhone for £169?

Apple do an out of warranty replacement for broken phones. £169 gets you the identical one you have - no upgrade or change in spec at all.

Just head to an apple store and the check old one and then give you a new one in exchange for money!


EDIT - sorry just seen other replies. Did not realise it was in any way limited re number of replacements.
 
Thanks Jimmy it did make me laugh and sweat all at the same time. I bet the best bit was once your bum hit the aeroplane seat and you could let the whole incidence wash by so to speak and nothing lost.
 
Nice one Jimmy very funny, best part is H trying to waterboard you with the hose as you came up....... At least you went down yourself unlike Deleted User who would have sent his SWIMBO I suspect..... ??
 
Thanks for all the comments. It was all a mad panic at the time but we got away with it, so all good

Mmm, Saturday night must have been quite some night;)

I take it the keys weren't of the much hated 'keyless' variety otherwise I suspect you'd still be trying to start the scooter now

PS what's a financier cake? Something that tastes disappointing, leaves a bad after taste and for which the bill is always far bigger than you thought?:D

And yes, no transponders were harmed in the making of this anecdote - just a small bunch of good old-fashioned keys.

I'll treat you to a financier in France in a couple of weeks time Mike - but if you can't wait til then, Google is inevitably your friend :D

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Financier_(cake)
 
Nice one Jimmy very funny, best part is H trying to waterboard you with the hose as you came up....... At least you went down yourself unlike Deleted User who would have sent his SWIMBO I suspect..... ����

The SWIMBO was probably recruited for her ability to swim? Although I am sure that most SWMBO's are pretty adept at snorkelling as well.

Re worrying about bashing your noggin on sharp things when you are on the way back up (and usually in a bit of a panic, running out of air), I have found (yes, been there, done that a few times) it is useful to hang a weight over the side in way of where the escapee made it's bid for freedom such that it it is sitting on the bottom. Then you have a line to follow when going down (especially useful in murky water) and coming back up.
Odds are that the weight on the bottom will be sitting very close to the escapee.

I was wandering along our brand new marina dock a couple of weeks ago, and found a mobo moored stern to at the end, with two gents on board looking not very happy. One undressed to his boxers and then reluctantly jumped into the water, armed with a long boat hook. I thought this could be interesting so stayed to see what happened next. Swimming in the sea was obviously a very alien activity for Mr Boxers, and he didnt look very happy. He tried hard to dive underwater, but he was too buoyant, and couldnt get too far before running out of breath.
After various goes he clambered back onto the stern platform looking very dejected, and I asked what had happened. Turned out that he had dropped his electrical tool kit in the water (he had come to do some work on the boat as a contractor). Fortunately there were no meters or other things sensitive to water in the tool kit, but a lot of nice tools were sitting on the bottom.
So I suggested that maybe I could have a go at retrieving the kit for them. They looked at me in astonishment. The water was rather murky, and they had no masks on board, and I didnt look like a typical salvage diver.
So I stripped down to boxers, jumped in, did a jack-knife and headed for bottom. It was only about 10' deep, but with about 2' visibility. I saw various obscure outlines which I went and investigated by feel, and the third one was the tool kit. Grabbed it and came back up. The electrician was all ready to hand me the boathook, and he was astounded when I handed him his tool kit.
They kindly offered me a cold beer to say thanks - is it Heinekin that reaches the parts that others don't?

Another time was in Bermuda 20 years ago - a group of yachts at the fuel dock, tanking up with diesel before setting off for the Azores (anticipating lots of motoring, as the Azores High was very strong). The skipper of a lovely Oyster managed to drop his deck filler cap overboard when filling up and had resigned himself to cobbling together some temporary bung to get them to the Azores, or even back home, as the odds of finding one in Bermuda were scarce.
I volunteered to go and have a look - the water was pretty chilly (this was late April), but not as cold as Jimmy's Eau de Antibes, and (joy!) they had a mask on board. We dropped the dinghy anchor over the side next to the deck filler to use as a marker, and I went down the rope, again only about 10 - 12'. And the filler cap was sitting next to the dinghy anchor. The skipper was overjoyed to have his cap back, and insisted that we stay and have dinner and drinks with them before everybody set off eastwards the next morning.
 
The SWIMBO was probably recruited for her ability to swim? Although I am sure that most SWMBO's are pretty adept at snorkelling as well.

Re worrying about bashing your noggin on sharp things when you are on the way back up (and usually in a bit of a panic, running out of air), I have found (yes, been there, done that a few times) it is useful to hang a weight over the side in way of where the escapee made it's bid for freedom such that it it is sitting on the bottom. Then you have a line to follow when going down (especially useful in murky water) and coming back up.
Odds are that the weight on the bottom will be sitting very close to the escapee.

I was wandering along our brand new marina dock a couple of weeks ago, and found a mobo moored stern to at the end, with two gents on board looking not very happy. One undressed to his boxers and then reluctantly jumped into the water, armed with a long boat hook. I thought this could be interesting so stayed to see what happened next. Swimming in the sea was obviously a very alien activity for Mr Boxers, and he didnt look very happy. He tried hard to dive underwater, but he was too buoyant, and couldnt get too far before running out of breath.
After various goes he clambered back onto the stern platform looking very dejected, and I asked what had happened. Turned out that he had dropped his electrical tool kit in the water (he had come to do some work on the boat as a contractor). Fortunately there were no meters or other things sensitive to water in the tool kit, but a lot of nice tools were sitting on the bottom.
So I suggested that maybe I could have a go at retrieving the kit for them. They looked at me in astonishment. The water was rather murky, and they had no masks on board, and I didnt look like a typical salvage diver.
So I stripped down to boxers, jumped in, did a jack-knife and headed for bottom. It was only about 10' deep, but with about 2' visibility. I saw various obscure outlines which I went and investigated by feel, and the third one was the tool kit. Grabbed it and came back up. The electrician was all ready to hand me the boathook, and he was astounded when I handed him his tool kit.
They kindly offered me a cold beer to say thanks - is it Heinekin that reaches the parts that others don't?

Another time was in Bermuda 20 years ago - a group of yachts at the fuel dock, tanking up with diesel before setting off for the Azores (anticipating lots of motoring, as the Azores High was very strong). The skipper of a lovely Oyster managed to drop his deck filler cap overboard when filling up and had resigned himself to cobbling together some temporary bung to get them to the Azores, or even back home, as the odds of finding one in Bermuda were scarce.
I volunteered to go and have a look - the water was pretty chilly (this was late April), but not as cold as Jimmy's Eau de Antibes, and (joy!) they had a mask on board. We dropped the dinghy anchor over the side next to the deck filler to use as a marker, and I went down the rope, again only about 10 - 12'. And the filler cap was sitting next to the dinghy anchor. The skipper was overjoyed to have his cap back, and insisted that we stay and have dinner and drinks with them before everybody set off eastwards the next morning.

Good thinking with the weighted line Martin, you would soon loose sense of orientation once head down in the water, especially murky, which is typically where marinas are. Perhaps escapees with a broader surface area may tend to slither sideways on the way down though?
 
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