Monday blues-ok here's a joke

[janeK]

Monday blues-ok here\'s a joke

An Australian. a sheep and a dog were survivors of a terrible shipwreck

They found themselves stranded on a desert island

After being there a while, they got into a habit of going to the beach every evening to watch the sun set.

One particular evening, the sky was fiery red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze warm and gentle making small ripples across the still deep blue Ocean - a perfect night for romance.

As they all sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the Australian
Soon he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it.

But the Dog got jealous, growling fiercely until the Australian took his arm away from the Sheep.

After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling.

A few weeks more passed by and low and behold there was another Shipwreck.

The only survivor was a beautiful young women, the most beautiful young women in fact that the Australian had ever seen in his life before.

She was in a pretty bad way when they rescued her, but they slowly nursed back to good health again.

When the young Maiden had recovered enough, they also introduced her to their evening beach ritual.

It was another beautiful enchanting evening - Red Sky, Cirrus Clouds and warm and gentle breeze blowing ripples across the big still blue Ocean, a perfect night for romance .

As they sat there the Australian started to get " Those feelings" again-
He fought them as long as he could but finally gave in and leaned over to the Beautiful young women , cautiously and whispered in her ear -

"Would you mind taking the dog for a walk ? "


<hr width=100% size=1>If work was so good, the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.

 

[Goodge]

Re: Monday blues-ok here\'s a joke

Milk Advantages

The student - not necessarily a well-prepared student - sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper.

The question directed:

"Give four advantages of breast milk."

What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble
whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:

1. No need to boil.
2. Cats can't steal it.
3. Available whenever necessary.

Um. So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a four-part answer.

Again, what to write?

Once more he sighed. He frowned. He scowled. Then sighed again.

But suddenly, he brightened.

He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly scribbled his definitive answer:

4. Available in attractive containers.


<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[BlueSkyNick]

Good use of a cat - could be boaty.

Instructions on how to clean your toilet:

1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to
the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the
bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both
lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the
noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a
"power-wash" and rinse".

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there
are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both
lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the
bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

Sincerely,

The Dog


<hr width=100% size=1>WANTED - For House and Boat Maintenance - A large supply of round tuits.