Modern fairy tale

[Stingo]

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shore of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.

The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said: Elegant lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so.

That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself: I don't f___ing think so!

<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.stingo.co.uk>http://www.stingo.co.uk</A> - now showing at a computer near you

 

[jhr]

Once upon a time, a computer nerd was walking along the road when he heard a voice calling to him from from the verge. Looking down he saw, to his suprise, that he was being addressed by a small green frog. "Hello, small green frog" he said "what can I do for you?". The frog replied "Actually, I am a beautiful Princess, possessed of unimaginable wealth and stupendous sexual athleticism, who has been turned into a frog by a wicked witch. If you kiss me, I will revert to my human form and you can marry me, spend my money and engage in esoteric and exhausting sexual practices with me".

The nerd thought for a moment then, without kissing the frog, picked it up and put it in his pocket. "Hey" cried a muffled voice "why won't you kiss me?". The nerd thought for a moment and then replied "A beautiful princess is OK, if you like that sort of thing, but a talking frog is cooooooool.................."

 

[jimi]

I met a frog once ... drove a Renault and stank of garlic ...

 

[sailbadthesinner]

Re: Jimi itake it

the auld alliance is no more then???

Ok brain let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.

 

[steve_cronin]

That\'s hardly P C...

It should have read:-

I met a frog once ... drove a rusty bouncy old car and stank of garlic ...

What you got against Renaults?

Steve Cronin

 

[AndrewB]

Oh dear. Does this signify trouble ...

... with your "Wanted - Willing Woman for Extended Cruise" ad on the crewfinder board??

;-)

 

[jimi]

Re: That\'s hardly P C...

Absolutely nothing ... except they're made in frogland .. they do'nt buy our cars so why should we buy theirs, wait a minuet .. scratch head .. do we make any cars now?

 

[steve_cronin]

cars

Seen the new MGs? 700bhp - more than a Ferarri F1 car! Then there's TVR, Gilbern, Bristol, Aston Martin, Morgan, Alvis (<1 a year) Bentley, Rolls, Rover - OK last three made with a large number of foreign sourced components but you didn't exclude that - jaguar (Ford owned but British by design and development) Caterham, Lotus, Marcos.

Shal I go on?

Steve Cronin

 

[jimi]

Re: cars

Thought the new Jag was a Mondeo in disguise?

 

[ccscott49]

Re: cars

I believe BOO HOO Marcos is now defunct, great floods of tears, used to love mine!!

 

[Magic_Sailor]

Umm

Aren't Bentley, Rolls and Aston Martin by Mrecedes or BMW (can't remember). And I think you'll find Lotus is in fact Daiwoo (or Isuzu?).

Even with them, they don't add up to much do they.



Magic

 

[bigmart]

Re: Umm

Bentley & Rolls are Vokswagen, Aston Martin = Ford & Lotus = Proton

Its hard to work out who does waht these days.

Martin

 

[DavidBolger]

Re: Umm

Well at least the British still have their

Empire
Boatbuilding industry
Royal family
Pound
Pint
Fish & chips

 

[jfm]

Re: There are more British cars than that

They're still Bristish cars though, unless you're geoff Hoon, aren't they? UK-built Fords, Vauxhalls, Nissan, Toyota, Honda, Minis are Britsih too, for the same reason. British ought to mean built here, not the nationality of the shareholder, surely? (Unless, as I say, you're Geoff Hoon).

Alternatively, if you think these are foreign cars, then Moody's are South African yachts, as are Princess and Fairline (because ultimate shareholder is S African)

 

[bigmart]

Re: There are more British cars than that

You forgot Peugeot, TVR, Bristol & Noble. I expect there are more as well.

Anyway. Get a life.

Who cares who makes what?

I was just correcting the information in a previous post.

Martin

 

[Grehan]

Minor corrections + additions

Bentley = Volkswagen
Rolls = BMW
SAAB = G.M (Vauxhall)
Nissan = Renault (er, I think so, anyway) (something surprising . .)
Ferrari = Fiat
Lambo = Fiat?
Daeow (?), day-oh day-ay-ay-oh, dunno = in big trouble?

etc etc

 

[charles_reed]

Re: cars

Yep,
Mondeo floorpan - and what's wrong with that? The Mondeo has been one of the longest-running, outstanding cars of its time. The last dog produced by Ford was the Escort

Motor manufacturing is global - claiming they have a nationality is pretty academic - we still have a very live 1st tier in the UK and, more significantly, ALL the race cars are developed, usually built and frequently tuned in the UK.

 

[jfm]

I wasn\'t being critical bigmart, but will be now

Bigmart, what a nice tone to your post. I have a life thanks, you're the guy with the Colvic 26.

 

[bigmart]

Re: I wasn\'t being critical bigmart, but will be now

Cor, You're Touchy.

I havn';t had a life in years.

Where did you get yours.

Martin

 

[ccscott49]

Re: I wasn\'t being critical bigmart, but will be now

Married are you?