fisherman
Well-known member
How did dinner go after that?On topic, I first came across the "please sit down" sign at the house of a very annoying, penis envy ridden client - and took great pleasure in ignoring it
Just Remember, Gentlemen...
- Thread starter Aja
- Start date
mjcoon
Well-known member
Did they have a spray-checking dog? Or CCTV? ;-)
KevinV
Well-known member
My smile lit up the room and a good time was had by all - obviously
oldharry
Well-known member
However did we survive before we knew how dangerous it is for gentlemen to remain standing? Anyway certain common prostate conditions it's not possible to empty the bladder properly while seated.
Fantasie 19
Well-known member
2 ltr plastic milk container.. even cheaper...
KeithMD
Well-known member
Ditto when wearing sandles with no socks.
KeithMD
Well-known member
In reply to the O/P, I have to confess I've been beaten into submission house-trained by M'Lady and #1 Daughter. Who both complained loudly and at great length every time I dared to do it standing up and then (to compound the offence) left the lid up as well.
The only place my conduct is now acceptable is around the perimeter of our garden, where (I maintain) it is useful to deter would-be predators and safeguard our chickens.
The only place my conduct is now acceptable is around the perimeter of our garden, where (I maintain) it is useful to deter would-be predators and safeguard our chickens.
mjcoon
Well-known member
Not exactly predators, but that is the eco-friendly way that the local Badger Group suggests for deterring badgers if their entry point can be established.
Lightwave395
Well-known member
It doesn't work, at least with my wee. An electric fence has definitely fixed the problem though
Porthandbuoy
Well-known member
Standing orders on my boat include “Gentlemen shall not pee over the side.” US coastguard fish too many dead guys out of the water with ‘open fly syndrome’
In the heads though why do the likes of Jabsco, etc. Sell toilet seats like this
While big ships seem to have seats like this.
Seriously, a leeward lurch could leave a bloke sitting to pee for the rest of his (or her?) life.
In the heads though why do the likes of Jabsco, etc. Sell toilet seats like this
While big ships seem to have seats like this.
Seriously, a leeward lurch could leave a bloke sitting to pee for the rest of his (or her?) life.
Sandy
Well-known member
I struggle with the small diameter of a 2 ltr plastic milk container2 ltr plastic milk container.. even cheaper...
Another worrying question is am I expected to fill it on each performance? I have visions of Matron, Hattie Jacques, from the Carry On films saying, 'I expect to see that filled when I return'!
mjcoon
Well-known member
I don't remember that quote. But I do remember the "What, from here?" by Norman Stanley Fletcher. (Which was apparently reused in another programme by the same writers.)I struggle with the small diameter of a 2 ltr plastic milk container
Another worrying question is am I expected to fill it on each performance? I have visions of Matron, Hattie Jacques, from the Carry On films saying, 'I expect to see that filled when I return'!
MisterBaxter
Well-known member
You definitely don't want to wee on that, mind you... I've seen it done (in a field in the dark) and the gentleman concerned won't forget the experience.
mjcoon
Well-known member
Conjures up the porno version of Frankenstein - electrifying...
Mister E
Well-known member
Ladies please stay seated for the entire performance, gentlemen please stay seated it is shorter than you think.
Spirit (of Glenans)
Well-known member
Beware of combining those two strategies simultaneously.....
Spirit (of Glenans)
Well-known member
Strange! I would have thought that the contrary was true. As the great poet once wrote:
"No matter how much you shake your peg,
The last drop always rolls down your leg".
This just doesn't happen when you do it sitting down.
oldharry
Well-known member
Personal experience dear boy.... and before anyone asks, yes the Docs have checked it out and say it's to be expected in many cases. And your poet friend is wrong as the change of posture can allow a further last drop after standing up. So I have learned to be cautious about standing up after a seated performance!Strange! I would have thought that the contrary was true. As the great poet once wrote:
"No matter how much you shake your peg,
The last drop always rolls down your leg".
This just doesn't happen when you do it sitting down.
Old age brings a whole set of problems I never expected or imagined!
boomerangben
Well-known member
I hope your neighbour doesn’t try the pee method on your boundary
mjcoon
Well-known member
Revelation: there are other ways of absorbing drips! If it was all more talked about there might be fewer deaths from late-discovery prostate cancer. A side effect of a prostate operation (e.g. TURP) is the extraction of a biopsy for testing...
