Dear Doctor,

[jimi]

I like drinking but .. more than 3 pints and I get blocked sinuses and a migraine ... what should I do?

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[chuns]

Practice more. You'll get better at it.

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[Evadne]

Ha'way hinny. Try pootin in wor mooth an' swalluwin, wor seenusses 's fur tab smoouk.

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[jhr]

Try snorting cocaine: It'll clear your sinuses and, although you may still have a migraine, it'll be the best goddam migraine in the world! ever! honest!

Actually, don't. It's the Devil's dandruff and you will end up looking like Daniella Westbrook, with no nasal septum (though, come to think of it, this may still be an improvement..........)

<hr width=100% size=1>Je suis Marxiste - tendance Groucho

 

[Sybarite]

Only 3 pints of Scotch and you get migraines etc? What would happen if you took the real stuff...Irish?

John

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[dralex]

Try rectal vodka and bypass the top end altogether- and you thought you'd never find another use for that emergency diesel funnel.

<hr width=100% size=1>Life's too short- do it now./forums/images/icons/wink.gif

 

[ccscott49]

drink standing on yer heid!

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[jimi]

Listen ye load of wasters, here am I with a lifestyle threatening condition and ye larf at me whilst you ladle sypathy on that big woofter Nick who's only got a runny nose! Humphh!

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[claymore]

When I was 20 I couldn't hold my willie down with two hands.
Now I am 50 odd I can hold it down with one - am I getting stronger?

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=purple>regards
Claymore<font color=purple>
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http://www.whoi.edu/services/facilities/CLAYMORE/

 

[Twister_Ken]

DearJamesie

As you are vertically challenged you don't have a lot of internal capacity. Try having a pee. That should bring the level of booze down and clear your sinusii nicely.

As to the migraine, a Scottish friend of mine is acquainted with your condition and reckons if you pop below for a minute, then proceed to sleep all the way from Cherbourg to Gosport, that should get rid of it.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.writeforweb.com/twister1>Let's Twist Again</A>

 

[ChrisE]

I\'ve got just the medicine for you young man

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[jimi]

Re: I\'ve got just the medicine for you young man

Bugger me , I'll have tae get a case and I do'nt even like the stuff!

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[dralex]

No Claymore- your willy has got longer and therefore you have more leverage which therefore makes it easier to keep down with one hand. If you're really struggling to tame the beast, try some 7mm neoprene shorts.

<hr width=100% size=1>Life's too short- do it now./forums/images/icons/wink.gif

 

[Clive_Rigden]

7mm eh? That long!

<hr width=100% size=1>Khyber

 

[Clive_Rigden]

Jimi, have you tried taking it orally ?
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<hr width=100% size=1>Khyber

 

[dralex]

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<hr width=100% size=1>Life's too short- do it now./forums/images/icons/wink.gif

 

[mikesharp]

You have what is technically known as a 3 pint head. Try swallowing.

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[ships_budgie]

I'd be happy if I could drink even a single pint given my small stature, so think yourself lucky.

<hr width=100% size=1>Ruffle my feathers big boy

 

[Aja]

No. Practice makes perfect.

Ahem

Donald

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[wishbone]

NO! I think youv'e tamed the brute!! sweetie................

<hr width=100% size=1>Wishbone
Rolling, rolling, rolling keep them doggies moving!
Where’s me chuck wagon gone?