Boat cleaning disease

[Gludy]

Tcm is to blame!!!!

How stupid could I be ..... I found this thread amusing and so read some of the posts out to my better half .... she walked away smiling only to return a few seconds later reminding me in no uncertain terms of my broken promises - jobs I had promised to do three weeks ago .... I have just spent an hour doing some very dirty jobs .... all because tcm started this thread!!!!!!

Paul

 

[tcm]

Re: sorry bout that!

teehee

 

[Gludy]

Jets win again!

Thats it - I am about to buy a bl**dy big JET wash for all those dirty jobs - seems that it will be more efficient than the mop with iall its protuding bits that keep getting caught and be far more efficient with my time - I have also looked at the deprecaition side:-
Jet wash cost say £200 - worth about £50 a year later depreciation 75%.
Mop costs say £4 but its worth nothing a year later - depreciation 100%.

So there!!!!!!


Paul

 

[oldgit]

Re: Haa bloody haa.

Recently moved into new house(only 18 months ago mind)and am still 2planning what to to do with garden after boat is totally sorted.Now bloody neighbors have all gone into full decking/ponds and poncy designers+ at least 6 irish blokes for weeks on end mode.My natural meadow look with added thistles and bindweed has drawn hurtfull comments from wife/children of a skinflint/lazy git nature.Advice needed.

 

[ToMo]

Re: Jets win again!

Power Wash @ B & Q for £49 - just got one...it's a great little mean green machine!
TôMö

 

[ToMo]

Re: Haa bloody haa.

How about changing your forum handle ? <G>
TôMö

 

[oldgit]

Re: Haa bloody haa.

I could change it to Happy- fluffy- pink -furry -kittens on the forum,but rest of the known universe and my daughter would still be calling me a tight wadded skinflinty miserable old g*t.

 

[parm]

Re: The cure.....

this is parm's wife.
this sounds so familiar. nothing done around home but plenty on the boat. won't wash the car but always washs the boat.etc etc

 

[longjohnsilver]

Not a disease, it\'s an epidemic!

Even I have taken to cleaning my old tub at the end of the day to get rid of all the salt deposits and other muck. This worries me as it took me 3 years to get around to polishing the coachroof.

I also keep the bilges almost spotless, but then I've always done this as a matter of course so I can spot anything untowards such as oil. But constant cleaning and polishing of the topsides is a real worry not only to me but also very shocking for all my regular crew, praps they're worried that they will be expected to join in!!

 

[Deleted User YDKXO]

Speaking as somebody who regularly hoovers his engines and has fallen off a flybridge whilst trying to clean that bit on the top of the radome that you can never quite reach, I find the behaviour you describe to be entirely normal although my wife might not agree

 

[BarryD]

Ja TCM, Dis is a vell known pwroblem. You shoudt come to Chichester next veekend and cwean mine.

Curse this fake accent, did you know it was me?

Go left, YOUR OTHER left for pete's sake
(IMHO, BTW, FWIW and NWGOI)

 

[tcm]

Re: hello stranger

we're have you been then? Hope the er Mack Truck is ok, and the small trucklet too. I just dare you to use the name if it's a boy...

 

[BarryD]

Re: hello stranger

Hi chum,

Been busy and not had a lot of play time of late. Short person very scared of boats at the moment which really bolloxs things up. Thought we might try him on KevBs boat, but on second thoughts that might be a bad idea...

Sorry to hear that the Leopard is not 100%, I'm sure that you melted the phone system "explaining" your position.

Cheers BarryD.

Go left, YOUR OTHER left for pete's sake
(IMHO, BTW, FWIW and NWGOI)

 

[tcm]

Re: hello stranger

Hm, You cd try throwing him in the sea, letting him fall off pontoons, letting him falls off things, letting him bang his head on stuff and so on. This will make them totally unfazed by anything on boats. Tho they will think you a bit of a plonker when they get a bit older....

 

[BarryD]

Great plan!

Will execute straight away.

Go left, YOUR OTHER left for pete's sake
(IMHO, BTW, FWIW and NWGOI)

 

[Guest]

Re: Jets win again!

Advice: change wife! I am all for the meadow look - t'other half who is the boat owner has this strange idea that it needs mowing?!? Why mow when you can sail?

dragon lady

 

[coliholic]

Hmm, bit worried about all this cleaning. After all it's not really your job is it?. All you're achieving by doing all this work is undermining the confidnece of your lovely wife. 'Cos in reality all this cleaning and stuff is her job. Just think what effect that's having on her.

It is important for us men to remember that as our women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell.

Let me relate how I handle the situation.

When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became necessary for SWMBO to get a full-time job both for extra income and for the private health insurance benefits that we need. She was a trained lab tech when we met thirty some years ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical center as a phlebotomist.


It was shortly after she started working at this job that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from fishing about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell at her when this happens.

Instead, I tell her to take her time. I understand that she is not as young as she used to be. I just tell her to wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.

She used to wash and dry the dishes as soon as we finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each evening that they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to help her get them done before she goes to bed.

Our washing machine and tumble dryer are in the basement. When she was younger, she used to be able to go up and down the stairs all day and not get tired. Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening I am willing to overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to the Monday's lodge meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's darts match or something like that, I will tell her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little more time to do some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming, or dusting.

Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace. However, she's starting to complain a little occasionally. Not often, mind you, but just enough for me to notice.

For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her figure any, if you know what I mean.

When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more rest periods than she used to have to take. A couple of weeks ago she said she had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the lawn. I overlook comments like these because I realise it's just age talking. In fact, I try to not embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep.

I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm coming from. I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support her on a daily basis. I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy.

Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible.

No-one knows better than I do how frustrating women can become as they get older.

My purpose in writing this is simply to suggest that you make the effort. I realize that achieving the exemplary level of showing consideration I have attained is out of reach for the average man. However, even if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this article, I will consider that writing it was worthwhile. And of course if whilst cleaning the boat she seems to get a little flustered, just tell her to slow down a bit and not make too much noise huffing and puffing and disturbing your snooze on the sundeck.

 

[tcm]

New MBY supplement: AHOY! magazine

Hallo! – or should we say- AHOY! – as that’s the name of the all-new MBY quarterly supplement of rich and famous people and their boats. For this first issue, we’ll be talking in detail with Coliholic, friend of someone who once saw someone have a drink with TV mogul Michael Grade’s dynmaic and go-getting son in a buzzing London pub where there was a postcard of the sun-kissed caribbean island of Antigua.

Coliholic is a keen boater, and we’ve been lucky enough to join him for a whole day in his hectic schedule, starting from his home in the UK.

A: Ahoy! Coliholic? Or can we call you Colin?
C: Who the hell's that? Do you know what time this is? It's hardly even 9 o'clock! And it says “no hawkers” – can’t you read?
A: It’s AHOY magazine! We’ve come to do the interview!
C: Eh? Well, I’m not ready. Have you come to read the meter?
A: No, we’ve come to do an interview – about the boat? There’ll be pics of the boat and everything
C: That git tcm has put you up to this, hasn’t he? Anyway, I’m still having breakfast. You’ll have to come back later when er indoors has had a chance to wash the boat…

Later, aboard Coliholic’s boat:
A: Coliholic, it’s a delight to meet you in person. Tell us, what has fame done for you?
C: It’s hardly changed me at all. I’m still the same person. I did see the film once, but switched over to see the football towards the end. I think there’s a stage version on in London, which caused a bit of a traffic jam, but other than that, Fame has had no effect on my life whatsoever.

A: And you lovely wife- how’s she doing?
C: She’s doing very well. Very well indeed. This morning she made an excellent triple breakfast, and then cleaned the boat in what I think is a record time for her this month. There’ll be plenty of time for her to wash up before making a start on lunch.

A: Since you first burst on to our screens in “Very Big Splash” I understand that you’ve had lots of film offers. Can you tell us about those?
C: I have had a few film offers, yes. But when you read them in detail, they’re not as good as they seem.
A: So, will you be taking any of them up in the near future?
C: Yes, I’ll probably go with the Bonusprint 2-for-the price-of-1.

Pic 1: Coliholic in water in Med
Pic 2 : Coliholic in water in solent
Pic 3: Coliholic (wearing unlikely brand new casual clothes) discovers Lost Washer underneath starboard engine and proudly displays it to our photographer.
Pic 4: Coliholic fumbles washer which flies overboard and plops into the water.
Pic 5: Coliholic loses footing, and goes overboard after the washer.

Reader Offer:
AHOY’s special offer series continues with an aerial tour of Coliholic. Exclusive signed prints are available in one size of “large”.