sarabande
Well-Known Member
Once upon a time there was a little girl who used to go out every day and play with lots of her friends in the nearby woods. Although all the children knew that the woods and all the trees and all the birds and all the mice and all the interesting paths were owned by a kind old man who lived in a castle far far away, they knew that sometimes on very rare occasions he became every angry and sent his hench-persons to chase the children out of the wood because of the noise they made. Sometimes the hench-persons would not allow one or two of the noisier children back into the woods, saying that they were a “bad 'fluence and example ” to the other children.
Now, it happened that these children were very bright and liked to chat, like all children over the whole wide world, about what it is like to be grown-up and own a wood, or even a castle far far away. Sometimes they talked with their mummies and daddies, and learned about words like “ethical pressure”, “libellous”, and “litigation”, and they wanted to be able to talk about these long words to the owner of the woods who lived in the castle far far away, but they couldn't because he didn't really like talking with children. And so they sometimes talked with the hench-persons because the children believed that the hench-persons had been children themselves one day long long ago.
Now one day, all the children went to the woods to play among the trees and birds and mice and paths, and they found that someone had crept into the woods overnight, and pinned a notice to a tree at just the right height for the children to read. And some of the children went off to play, but one or two stood and carefully read what the notice said.
The notice which had lots of pictures, said that that the owner of the woods, who lived in the far-away castle, had a good friend who had sold an expensive shiny white carriage to another rich man so that his horses could pull his lovely white carriage across the highways and byways, wherever he wanted to go, with his friends and family and bus-i-ness part-ners.
But, said the notice, in words which did not seem angry and upset but quite calm and peaceful, the expensive shiny white carriage did not work properly, and the rain came in through the roof, and the wheels wobbled, and the paint fell off, and lots of nice shiny things turned out to be not-shiny things when it began to rain.
And the rich man who had bought the expensive carriage from the friend of the man who lived in the castle far far away, was sad and spoke with the people who had made the carriage. They said magic words back to him, like “Fairwareandtear” and “Notinthewarranty,Guv”.
Now the rich man who had bought the carriage, had named it after the magic part of the sky right above your head because that used to be a very nice and important and very magic word, and showed that you knew a lot about earning money to buy expensive shiny white carriages. And he was upset and cheesed-off with the carriage makers, because when you buy an expensive white carriage, you expect that the wheels will go round properly, the paint will not fall off, and you will be able to drive the carriage full of your friends and family and bus-i-ness part-ners around the summer countryside and have Fun, which the children thought was the most important thing in the world.
But, sadly, the new notice continued, the people who made the carriage, who were friends with the nice old man who lived in the castle far far away, were very good at making carriages, but not very good at mending them properly.
And the rich man who bought the carriage had written down on the notice in the woods all the things that had gone wrong with his carriage, because he was very very upset. Some of the children who could read quickly, read all the stories of things going wrong, and began to wonder if it could all be true. And they thought “When I grow up to be rich and famous, I don't think I will buy a carriage like that.”
Now scarcely had a few of the children read to the end of the notice, than one of the hench-persons came along, huffing and puffing, and the children realised that the people who had made the carriage were upset and angry with the nice old man who lived in the castle far far away, because the notice had appeared suddenly in his wood. The hench-person took his mighty axe, and with one blow chopped the tree with notice on it right down to the ground. But the notice fluttered away in the wind and became stuck on a nearby twig, and the children rushed after it to look at it again.
ZWOOOOSH-CRUNCH went the mighty axe again, and the hench-person looked darkly and menacingly at the children, and grabbed the notice and hid it inside his leather jerkin, and went back to the far far castle without even speaking to the children.
And the children were sad, very sad, because they believed in Truth and Openness and Honesty, which their kind teachers and loving parents had spoken about ever since they were tiny children scarcely able to walk or read for themselves. Above all, they believed that hench-persons should tell the children who were really quite grown-up in many ways, why the old man in the castle thought the message in the wood was not a good message. Even a simple explanation would have been enough to meet the childrens' “'satiable curiosity”.
The next day, when they saw one of the hench-persons, they shouted at him and asked why he had chopped down the tree with the notice, but he just looked at them, and turning, jabbed his thumb in the direction of the far away castle, and turned his back without saying a single word of explanation. So the children knew that even true stories do not always have a happy ending.
Now, it happened that these children were very bright and liked to chat, like all children over the whole wide world, about what it is like to be grown-up and own a wood, or even a castle far far away. Sometimes they talked with their mummies and daddies, and learned about words like “ethical pressure”, “libellous”, and “litigation”, and they wanted to be able to talk about these long words to the owner of the woods who lived in the castle far far away, but they couldn't because he didn't really like talking with children. And so they sometimes talked with the hench-persons because the children believed that the hench-persons had been children themselves one day long long ago.
Now one day, all the children went to the woods to play among the trees and birds and mice and paths, and they found that someone had crept into the woods overnight, and pinned a notice to a tree at just the right height for the children to read. And some of the children went off to play, but one or two stood and carefully read what the notice said.
The notice which had lots of pictures, said that that the owner of the woods, who lived in the far-away castle, had a good friend who had sold an expensive shiny white carriage to another rich man so that his horses could pull his lovely white carriage across the highways and byways, wherever he wanted to go, with his friends and family and bus-i-ness part-ners.
But, said the notice, in words which did not seem angry and upset but quite calm and peaceful, the expensive shiny white carriage did not work properly, and the rain came in through the roof, and the wheels wobbled, and the paint fell off, and lots of nice shiny things turned out to be not-shiny things when it began to rain.
And the rich man who had bought the expensive carriage from the friend of the man who lived in the castle far far away, was sad and spoke with the people who had made the carriage. They said magic words back to him, like “Fairwareandtear” and “Notinthewarranty,Guv”.
Now the rich man who had bought the carriage, had named it after the magic part of the sky right above your head because that used to be a very nice and important and very magic word, and showed that you knew a lot about earning money to buy expensive shiny white carriages. And he was upset and cheesed-off with the carriage makers, because when you buy an expensive white carriage, you expect that the wheels will go round properly, the paint will not fall off, and you will be able to drive the carriage full of your friends and family and bus-i-ness part-ners around the summer countryside and have Fun, which the children thought was the most important thing in the world.
But, sadly, the new notice continued, the people who made the carriage, who were friends with the nice old man who lived in the castle far far away, were very good at making carriages, but not very good at mending them properly.
And the rich man who bought the carriage had written down on the notice in the woods all the things that had gone wrong with his carriage, because he was very very upset. Some of the children who could read quickly, read all the stories of things going wrong, and began to wonder if it could all be true. And they thought “When I grow up to be rich and famous, I don't think I will buy a carriage like that.”
Now scarcely had a few of the children read to the end of the notice, than one of the hench-persons came along, huffing and puffing, and the children realised that the people who had made the carriage were upset and angry with the nice old man who lived in the castle far far away, because the notice had appeared suddenly in his wood. The hench-person took his mighty axe, and with one blow chopped the tree with notice on it right down to the ground. But the notice fluttered away in the wind and became stuck on a nearby twig, and the children rushed after it to look at it again.
ZWOOOOSH-CRUNCH went the mighty axe again, and the hench-person looked darkly and menacingly at the children, and grabbed the notice and hid it inside his leather jerkin, and went back to the far far castle without even speaking to the children.
And the children were sad, very sad, because they believed in Truth and Openness and Honesty, which their kind teachers and loving parents had spoken about ever since they were tiny children scarcely able to walk or read for themselves. Above all, they believed that hench-persons should tell the children who were really quite grown-up in many ways, why the old man in the castle thought the message in the wood was not a good message. Even a simple explanation would have been enough to meet the childrens' “'satiable curiosity”.
The next day, when they saw one of the hench-persons, they shouted at him and asked why he had chopped down the tree with the notice, but he just looked at them, and turning, jabbed his thumb in the direction of the far away castle, and turned his back without saying a single word of explanation. So the children knew that even true stories do not always have a happy ending.
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