Women Skippers

[Mark-1]

Anything to encourage more women to hop behind the helm has to be a healthy thing..

I'm always a bit uneasy about this kind of statement. If it's useful to encourage women to do stuff that men are typically more interested in, should men be encouraged to do things women are typically more interested in? And if we were encouraged would we really do it?

 

[Bouba]

I'm always a bit uneasy about this kind of statement. If it's useful to encourage women to do stuff that men are typically more interested in, should men be encouraged to do things women are typically more interested in? And if we were encouraged would we really do it?

I encourage it so that if anything happens to me, she can still dock the boat....

 

[Mark-1]

very few women want the conn

Unless there's a filthy muddy anchor. Then they insist on the helm. (IME)

In contrast, 8yo boys can't wait to get up close and personal with a muddy anchor. (IME)

 

[Mark-1]

I encourage it so that if anything happens to me, she can still dock the boat....

I think BBM was talking about encouraging women into the sport rather than people already doing it.

 

[Graham376]

I'm always a bit uneasy about this kind of statement. If it's useful to encourage women to do stuff that men are typically more interested in, should men be encouraged to do things women are typically more interested in? And if we were encouraged would we really do it?

I persuaded my wife to do a day skipper course without me, she had already done coastal skipper theory at night school. She came back with far more confidence and more enjoyment by feeling she could contribute more. Autopilot handles 90% of steering, wife helms while I pick up mooring, I helm when berthing in marina, she's more agile.

 

[davidaprice]

My wife loves sailing but isn't interested in it. We've both done the basic navigation evening class and got our VHF papers, but I'm the one who took all the more advanced classes and got qualified as a sailing and VHF instructor. I'm the one who watches sailing videos and reads sailing books. (I'm the one who raced dinghies in his youth, but all our cruising sailing has been together).

On the boat, my wife almost always steers, so that she doesn't have to winch sheets or put on mooring lines and fenders, etc. (I actually prefer not to be tied to the tiller, so I can wander around the deck and check up on things: trim the sails, check shroud tension and split rings, etc.) On rare occasions when docking goes pear shaped she will often hand me the tiller, since I have a better feel for how the boat behaves and how wind affects it.

My wife will happily sail our boat (Maxi 999) solo, has had to a few times recently when I've been stuck ashore with ill health. When we're both aboard I'm officially the skipper due to my greater sailing knowledge, though she'll make the decisions about where we're going and I only get a 'safety' veto. (I joke that I'm the Captain but she's the Admiral). I'm the one who knows how to rig and set the spinnaker, though naturally I'm the foredeck hand when we do so.

I'm also the one who does essentially all the maintenance and upgrades to the boats, since I have the technical knowledge and skills and as a techie I like to upgrade the boat's systems when I can.

 

[Stemar]

Is it not a bit of a cliche about men steering and shouting at woman as they crew?

The thing about clichés and stereotypes is that they often contain a grain of truth, even if it's only enough truth to be completely misleading.

That particular cliché certainly does - those people do exist, even if they're now no more than a good example of what not to do, and would have me reaching for a self-defence fender if I saw one approaching.

 

[Bouba]

Yelling at the wife is both wrong...and unavoidable. Take today for example....I am under the kitchen sink trying to fix a blockage....because of my bad knee, back and shoulder....swearing and yelling happens....and there is only one other person in the house. So after, I do what I always do...apologize profusely.... and the wife graciously acknowledges it wasn’t meant personally....but I always feel it’s another brick in the wall

 

[Daydream believer]

Yelling at the wife is both wrong...and unavoidable. Take today for example....I am under the kitchen sink trying to fix a blockage....because of my bad knee, back and shoulder....swearing and yelling happens....and there is only one other person in the house. So after, I do what I always do...apologize profusely.... and the wife graciously acknowledges it wasn’t meant personally....but I always feel it’s another brick in the wall

I think etablishing the perameters when working on such things would be better dealt with before one gets on one's hands & knees & hits one's head on the sink. Then laying on one's back, removing the trap, gingerly giving it to SWBO who promptly pours the contents of the trap into the sink bowl
My wife is most insistent that the resultant shower is not her fault & she is NOT a silly bitch & I can do the F...ing job myself before disappearing behind a slammed kitchen door.
To son:-
What's wrong with her all of a sudden??

 

[Bouba]

I think etablishing the perameters when working on such things would be better dealt with before one gets on one's hands & knees & hits one's head on the sink. Then laying on one's back, removing the trap, gingerly giving it to SWBO who promptly pours the contents of the trap into the sink bowl
My wife is most insistent that the resultant shower is not her fault & she is NOT a silly bitch & I can do the F...ing job myself before disappearing behind a slammed kitchen door.
To son:-
What's wrong with her all of a sudden??

I read that allowed to the wife....to mitigate the indignity she suffered while I was enjoying myself under the sink...she thought it was hilarious

 

[Daydream believer]

.she thought it was hilarious

Would not be a decent well established wife if she didn't