This made me larf!

themount2

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Heard last night on R4. It may not be new to you!
"At a new boat launching ceremony the proud owners were preparing to do the champagne bit and name the boat "Alice" after the wife. Alice began her speech and just as she had uttered the words "I name this ship..." she clumsily dropped the bottle and it smashed without hitting the boat.
After much discussion about bad luck and superstition, the boat is now called "Bugger"
Cheers
Brian

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Rowana

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Elderly Scotsman went for a holiday in "the Holy Land" and wanted to hire a boat on the Sea of Galilee.

"That will be two shillings, please"

"Twa shillins' ? TWA SHILLINS'? I can get a boat in Aberdeen for sixpence!"

"Ah, but this is Galilee and these are the waters on which our Lord walked."

"Och, it's nae winder he walked, seein' what ye chairge fer yer boats!"


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Mirelle

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Elderly lady aboard HMS Victory sees polished brass plaque let into deck - "Here Nelson Fell". "No wonder, I nearly did, too!"

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colinF

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What\'s this?

I posted that here a day or so ago and it seems you lifted it.

Reference your sources, my friend!

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PaulJ

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Some years back I was at a naming ceremony and the boat was being launched by a foreign lady whose english was good but not quite perfect. It went something like.... "I name this boat XXXXX.... and God help those who sail in her".

Well, it was nearly right ;o)

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