new col regs

[powerskipper]

I think we need some new col regs.

I propose that .

1. a] male boaters give way to lady boaters
b] Lady boaters must display a pink flag with a pussy on it.
c] If 2 Lady's meet the biggest gives way. if in doubt both give way.
d] No man may argue over col regs with a lady.

2 a] If 2 male boaters meet, biggest gives way.
b] they must display a flag with an explosive sign on red in colour.
c] if there are any arguments, it is settled with a water bomb fight at dawn.
d] If this is not possible, a paint ball may be fired at the other vessel, [ just avoid the most paint balled boat as they are argumentative]

3 a] polite hand gestures may be used to make intention clear.
b] all new boater must display a large green learner sign for there first year of boating.


anyone got any more ideas. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Malcb]

What's new about 1a, and 1d?

 

[Solitaire]

[ QUOTE ]
b] Lady boaters must display a pink flag with a pussy on it.


[/ QUOTE ]


Now there's a thought to conjure with! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[powerskipper]

I am so glad that you understand and accept those rules. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Lakesailor]

1c : Who is going to tell a lady boater she is the biggest?

 

[powerskipper]

let me clarify this point, it applies to the boat and not the person. So you males are safe. /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[powerskipper]

I think a little black pussy , like ships cat would be in good taste and appropriate.
/forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif /forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

 

[landaftaf]

to me thinking about the phrase 'give way' on the same page as 'ladies', 'display', 'pink' and 'pussy' conjour up images totally unconnected with the colregs ......... even now I am unable to form my thoughts in any cohearant way - so I am sorry I cannot add to this thread at the moment - although I so wish I could do so

dribble ...... droool .......

 

[landaftaf]

public school upbringing probably ........ we never grow up

 

[Solitaire]

Hmmmm - careful it does not to have too much white in it so it looks like a skull and X bones - other wise if entering Portsmouth Harbour you'll be asked to remove it!! /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

So hang a Postman Pat in the riging and then you can clear see, that it's Postman Pat with his black and white pussy! Partcularly early in the morning /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Oh dear I think it's time I went and finnished mowing the lawn! /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif I'm losing the plot here! /forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

 

[pessimist]

Does this mean you regard Ships Cat as a pussy?

 

[powerskipper]

Yes , but remember that pussy has claws. /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Lakesailor]

Bloody Hell! That's something they never tell you at school.

 

[Steve Clayton]

[ QUOTE ]
b] Lady boaters must display a pink flag with a pussy on it.


[/ QUOTE ]
Lady boaters can on occasion display a red flag with a pussy on it. All other boaters, including bigger lady boaters displaying a pink flag, must respect the situation by dipping their ensigns and stay well, well clear.

 

[aitchw]

A pnk pussy with a flag on it would be more appropriate for the gin palaces!

 

[FullCircle]

1. Steam gives way to sail. No question.

2. Orange indicators fitted to left and right of the shrouds, to signal turning intentions.

3. Headlamp flasher to let someone in (wont be used much).

4. A yacht only channel perpendicular to every TSS with Belisha beacon bouys either side.
5. Big boats must give way and stop if the yacht is already crossing the TSS. (see point 1 anyway)

6. A 5 knot speed limit within 10 miles of the TSS crossings so I can more easily predict a collision so the adversary is going the same speed as me.

7. Drive on the left, just like we do on the road. It gets confusing when I am driving home after a weekend on the boat.

8. Free and unrestricted entrance to any harbours regardless of whether the 7:49 express ferry needs to come out/go in. Under sail too.

 

[snowleopard]

I have no hesitation in giving way to lady skippers. I do however insist that they display proof. Flags not accepted. If we have to display balls....

 

[Lakesailor]

.......Tits out for the lads

 

[Phoenix of Hamble]

What makes you think that a female skipper wll actually use the orange indicator lights?

 

[snowleopard]

OK, OK, did you have to spell it out? /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif