I can't believe I'm doing this!!

Forbsie

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I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

I am at present hiding from the MD of the site that I'm working at. I am nearly 50 and I've never had to do this before. I'm a diligent worker and good at what I do but I do have limits. Those who know me will know that I do not shy away from a drink but I've only been here for 3 weeks and we've been in the pub every day and frequently don't come back!! /forums/images/icons/crazy.gif

I don't think that my liver will stand up to the punishment.

So while I'm cowering under the desk, here's a joke. /forums/images/icons/laugh.gif

HOW TO BATHE THE CAT
==================
1. Thoroughly clean toilet.

2. Lift both lids and add shampoo.

3. Find and soothe cat as you carry him to bathroom.

4. In one swift move, place cat in toilet, close both lids,and stand
on top...so cat cannot escape.

5. The cat will self agitate and produce ample suds. (Ignore ruckus
from inside toilet - cat is enjoying this)

6. Flush toilet 3 or 4 times. This provides power rinse, which is
quite effective. Cat is too big to go anywhere.

7. Have someone open outside door, stand as far from toilet as
possible, and quickly lift both lids.

8. Clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and outdoors, where he will
air dry. Cat will return when hungry.

Sincerely, The Dog


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Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

I like that /forums/images/icons/smile.gif and whilst on the subject of cleaning. ( How to clean a chimney) Take one hoover one piece of cardboard, four chickens, two bricks and one blowlamp. Send the wife out shopping, they like that. Tape the cardboard over the chimney breast, make a hole so the hoover nozzle will fit in, tie two chickens together with a brick on their legs, same with the other two. Now switch the hoover on and get someone to put the chickens down the chimney.They will flap like mad and when you hear them hit the bottom send the other two down. You will be amazed as to how clean the chimney is. Switch off hoover blowlamp the feathers off chickens and cook to taste. Charge the missus for chimney sweep and the chickens, Result clean chimney and quids in Happy days.

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Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

an22.gif


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Re: dear forbsie

not that i am bar shy meself but the last time i saw you you look like you had just come from Oliver Reeds funeral via George Best's birthday party, and you were talking about work then
i am getting increasingly worried about you
if i were you i would stop work altogether and get back in training
this work alcohol mix is obviously no good and you should cease and desist all activity not directly involved in getting lashed

i remain sir your obedient servant
sailbad

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>if guinness is good for you. i must be very very good</font color=red>
 
Re: Blonde in Natchitoches

Blonde in Natchitoches

Two tourists were traveling through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee, ''Before we order could you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly.'' The blonde leaned over and said ''Burrrrrrr Gurrrrrr Kingggg.''


<hr width=100% size=1>Julie ,
 
Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

Ahhhh what you need is a good week on the boats with roy and myself :O)

<hr width=100% size=1>Rowers ......Man in a boat ......Get the picture ?
 
Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

You've got to be kidding!!!

At least when I'm dragged screaming to a "meeting" in the pub, I'm still on billing.

You just deceive me with "We're just nipping up to The Anglers for a beer." FOUR DAYS LATER when you let me come home.../forums/images/icons/crazy.gif

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Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

sorry, next time i'll tell you it's just a quick couple of beers.

<hr width=100% size=1>Rowers ......Man in a boat ......Get the picture ?
 
Re: I can\'t believe I\'m doing this!!

Oh alright then. I'll see you down there in a couple of hours. /forums/images/icons/laugh.gif

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