French customs are on the hunt

[oz-1]

Hello every one. After reading all the comments about French authorities ( in this case customs officials), i decided to write about my experience. A few years ago, on my first solo trip to Cherbourg, i tied up at the marina, went and paid for a week's stay and went back to my small yacht. On the trip over, the gimbals on my cooker had broken on one side so i thought i'd have a look and see if i could fix it. About 30 minutes later
There was a knock on the hull, on looking up i saw 4 customs officers at the dockside. They asked if they could come on board and asked to see my documents. I invited them below, they had a look inside just a couple of lockers. One of the officers, on seeing my cooker on it's side asked if i had a problem with it. When i told him of what was wrong, he and one other officer offered to come back after their shift to give me a hand. I accepted, but thought that they would have better things to do and forget about it. To my surprise they both turned up at 6 pm with a bag of assorted stainless nuts and bolts. We got the cooker swinging again, so i asked if i could get them a drink at the marina bar. Next day they took me for a tour of thei customs cutter and a couple of days later they took me to a barbeque/party of a group of men and women. I can only speak as i find and can honestly say the french were friendly, courteous, kind and generous. I love their country, the culture and most of all, the people. This is from one who is proud to be both a British and Canadian citizen. I hope everyone has had the vaccine and are safe.

 

[Adios]

Hello every one. After reading all the comments about French authorities ( in this case customs officials), i decided to write about my experience. A few years ago, on my first solo trip to Cherbourg, i tied up at the marina, went and paid for a week's stay and went back to my small yacht. On the trip over, the gimbals on my cooker had broken on one side so i thought i'd have a look and see if i could fix it. About 30 minutes later
There was a knock on the hull, on looking up i saw 4 customs officers at the dockside. They asked if they could come on board and asked to see my documents. I invited them below, they had a look inside just a couple of lockers. One of the officers, on seeing my cooker on it's side asked if i had a problem with it. When i told him of what was wrong, he and one other officer offered to come back after their shift to give me a hand. I accepted, but thought that they would have better things to do and forget about it. To my surprise they both turned up at 6 pm with a bag of assorted stainless nuts and bolts. We got the cooker swinging again, so i asked if i could get them a drink at the marina bar. Next day they took me for a tour of thei customs cutter and a couple of days later they took me to a barbeque/party of a group of men and women. I can only speak as i find and can honestly say the french were friendly, courteous, kind and generous. I love their country, the culture and most of all, the people. This is from one who is proud to be both a British and Canadian citizen. I hope everyone has had the vaccine and are safe.

Thats a lovely story! Things like that can happen especially to nice people travelling alone. Still I can't help noticing that 4 customs officers visited. Maybe this is an over staffed operation that serves to give employment as much as it serves other functions. Like the Indian railways and most government jobs in the oil rich jobs poor gulf Arab states. But over staffing could be the simple explanation for seemingly overbearing officialdom

 

[DJE]

Ok my story of the French Customs. Leaving St Vaast bound for Portsmouth about mid-morning. As we approached Barfleur the cutter appeared coming round the corner from the west. He stopped a mile or so ahead of use and started to get his RIB ready to launch. So Sue went below and got all the documents together ready to be boarded. As soon as the RIB hit the water it made a bee line for Barfleur entrance and the crew on the cutter waved to us as we sailed by. It was near high water - I reckon they were going in for fresh bread and/or something nice for lunch.

 

[Bristolfashion]

Thats a lovely story! Things like that can happen especially to nice people travelling alone. Still I can't help noticing that 4 customs officers visited. Maybe this is an over staffed operation that serves to give employment as much as it serves other functions. Like the Indian railways and most government jobs in the oil rich jobs poor gulf Arab states. But over staffing could be the simple explanation for seemingly overbearing officialdom

Perhaps they had a trainee or two, perhaps they do joint visits sometimes to aid consistency, perhaps they were coming back from a job that requires more skills / staffing, perhaps they'd just had to deal with some dodgy & thuggish drug dealers. A very negative spin on a nice story.

 

[westhinder]

Knowing the French, and taking account of Brexit and how the Institute Pasteur attempt failed yes. The Belgian customs kicked against red fuel in a similar way.

Would you care to explain your last sentence? I’m not sure I understand what you mean in this context

 

[doris]

They were post graduate students from a Paris university doing a term in UK as part of the Erasmus scheme. Does that meet with your idea of lower grade establishment?
I understood that doing foreign study gave them some credit towards their national service.

Ah, if they were Parisien they're not really French! That lot and normal French people are totally separate races!!!!

 

[Adios]

Perhaps they had a trainee or two, perhaps they do joint visits sometimes to aid consistency, perhaps they were coming back from a job that requires more skills / staffing, perhaps they'd just had to deal with some dodgy & thuggish drug dealers. A very negative spin on a nice story.

How was that a negative spin? A better example of negative spin is you saying my comment was negative spin. A group of 4 customs officials seems about 3 more than you'd find here and we also have drug dealers etc. Having your yacht boarded by 14 groups of officers in one trip also supports the inoffensive and uncontroversial suggestion that they might be over staffed for some reason. You're just trying to pick a fight clearly so unless you're always like that I'll put it down to lockdown fever.

 

[Adios]

Ok my story of the French Customs. Leaving St Vaast bound for Portsmouth about mid-morning. As we approached Barfleur the cutter appeared coming round the corner from the west. He stopped a mile or so ahead of use and started to get his RIB ready to launch. So Sue went below and got all the documents together ready to be boarded. As soon as the RIB hit the water it made a bee line for Barfleur entrance and the crew on the cutter waved to us as we sailed by. It was near high water - I reckon they were going in for fresh bread and/or something nice for lunch.

OK @Daydream believer why were you boarded 14 times in a row? Do you have a massive ganja leaf patterned spinnaker?

 

[penfold]

True - these days, she's unlikely to ever ho to sea again.
But this was in 2011, and she was on her way to the Med. Her penultimate deployment to that area IIRC.

The reason she was 'missed' is rather embarassing.
There was an agreement between the UK/Germany/Norway to patrol the UK/Norway/Iceland gap with maritime patrol aircraft.
This would provide for at least on flight/day.
Then Germany withdrew it's Orions from service - this meant 5 flights every week.
Then CMD retired the RAF Nimrod and cancelled their successor.
This left only 2 Norwegian flights per week.
And that particular week the weather had been quite bad and both Norwegian flights had been cancelled.
And so a Russian task group can turn up in Scotland without warning.
Satellite coverage does generally not work when it's cloudy can't be a full replacement for MPA aircraft.

Blair(or possibly Brown) retired MR2, CMD sent the diggers in the break up MRA4 in 2010, years before it was likely to see service(if ever due to it being an appalling buggers muddle).

Egg on face. No matter, we have P8s now albeit not enough of them; on paper the kipper fleet might get on better with the Kawasaki P1, what with it actually being designed as a LRMP platform rather than for carrying Bill and Maureen to Tenerife.

 

[Bristolfashion]

How was that a negative spin? A better example of negative spin is you saying my comment was negative spin. A group of 4 customs officials seems about 3 more than you'd find here and we also have drug dealers etc. Having your yacht boarded by 14 groups of officers in one trip also supports the inoffensive and uncontroversial suggestion that they might be over staffed for some reason. You're just trying to pick a fight clearly so unless you're always like that I'll put it down to lockdown fever.

Although a better example of negative spin is you saying that my comment about your comment was negative.

I suggested a few perfectly reasonable alternative reasons why, on one inspection, there might be multiple officers. The only reason you gave was that over staffing leading to "seemingly overbearing officialdom" - it could have been nothing more than, "slow afternoon after a busy day, let's stretch our legs, catch up on work chat and see that nice Englishman on the way ...."

Still, if you see your preferred explanation as sunny & positive, generous to our kindly foreign neighbours and in the spirit of engendering good, cross-border relationships, that's nice.

 

[dom]

Although a better example of negative spin is you saying that my comment about your comment was negative.

Where is Franz Kafka when you need him?
?

 

[Adios]

"slow afternoon after a busy day, let's stretch our legs, catch up on work chat and see that nice Englishman on the way ...."

I don't know why my saying there seems to be more of them than they need, so they end up needlessly doing needless things, needs so much defending. ?‍

 

[Daydream believer]

OK @Daydream believer why were you boarded 14 times in a row? Do you have a massive ganja leaf patterned spinnaker?

No idea because I was cruising with my wife.
However, most of my sailing is single handed & my big search in Boulogne was when I arrived for the third time in less than 3 weeks, I had just completed 2 training weeks with some club members ( no visits from the douane) & then on the third trip I was on my way to the CIs. So 3 visits so quick probably raised eyebrows.
Single sailors working their way along the coast not far from the UK doing regular crossings probably do raise interest.
My son had reason to make a lot of business trips to Ireland on the ferry in a short while. The customs stopped him virtually every time, whilst cars with 2 or more were rarely stopped. So single males may be typical targets

As for Ganga I& my wife were asked by the Ostend customs & TV if we would help with a TV programme they were doing about a combined operation between dutch,belgian & Uk against drug smuggling. Obviously being very anti drug use we were willing to help. TV cameras were set up on the pontoon & customs officers were filmed coming aboard & going through the usual formalities. Everything packed up & thanks all round. Prog going on news that night.
An hour later a young official turns up ( very embarrassed) & says "sorry but we are going to have to fine you 2000 euros" "why?" " no name on the stern of the boat". i pointed out that in the UK I did not have to have one but he was having nothing. His boss was standing 50 yds away on dock wall watching. He went away & said he would be back re the fine in an hour. He came back & said that because we had helped with the TV prog they would run through TV prog & if transom did not show on film on news they would drop the fine & issue warning.
In the meantime I had put name on transom in felt tip pen.
Boss was watching 50 yds away
Official comes back. " please rub felt tip off transom, boss over there says you are taking piss because he cannot read it at 50 metres "
We had to wait until following day when young official came back smiling to tell us all was Ok & transom did not appear in the programme. He had clearly been embarrassed by it all and his boss had been an a..hole standing on the dock watching him. Too gutless to come & tell us all this himself; sending young official instead.
He warned us not to come back without name on transom because his boss was going to watch for us as I was a frequent visitor to Ostend.

 

[Sybarite]

Hello every one. After reading all the comments about French authorities ( in this case customs officials), i decided to write about my experience. A few years ago, on my first solo trip to Cherbourg, i tied up at the marina, went and paid for a week's stay and went back to my small yacht. On the trip over, the gimbals on my cooker had broken on one side so i thought i'd have a look and see if i could fix it. About 30 minutes later
There was a knock on the hull, on looking up i saw 4 customs officers at the dockside. They asked if they could come on board and asked to see my documents. I invited them below, they had a look inside just a couple of lockers. One of the officers, on seeing my cooker on it's side asked if i had a problem with it. When i told him of what was wrong, he and one other officer offered to come back after their shift to give me a hand. I accepted, but thought that they would have better things to do and forget about it. To my surprise they both turned up at 6 pm with a bag of assorted stainless nuts and bolts. We got the cooker swinging again, so i asked if i could get them a drink at the marina bar. Next day they took me for a tour of thei customs cutter and a couple of days later they took me to a barbeque/party of a group of men and women. I can only speak as i find and can honestly say the french were friendly, courteous, kind and generous. I love their country, the culture and most of all, the people. This is from one who is proud to be both a British and Canadian citizen. I hope everyone has had the vaccine and are safe.

It reminds me when I had a visit and I was in the middle of unblocking the head. I asked them if by any chance there was a plumber in their midst. One guy replied immediately, "No but we have a plongeur...!"
Plongeur = plunger = diver...) Much hilarity and no inspection.

 

[Adios]

Official comes back. " please rub felt tip off transom, boss over there says you are taking piss because he cannot read it at 50 metres "

Reminds me of the time I tried to pass a cars MOT retest with a fag packet wedged behind a number plate light to hold it in. Tester also thought I was taking the piss when he found it. It sounds like you might have been unusually unlucky with the authorities on that trip though.

A sailing friend from Brightlingsea said he once had a problem where some people were making him an offer he couldn't refuse which involved bringing drugs back in his boat. He really felt his life or legs at least was in danger if he refused. Not sure how he got out of it but of course he did. If he'd done it once they would no doubt have been back for more.

 

[ProMariner]

Vive la France

Customs and Immigration are a subset of any species, and generally not representative, badges are often the shield of petty men. This effect is worldwide.

Plus, we did divorce them, and we still have to pass them on the stairs every day? I hope I could still be so pleasant about it, were the tables turned.

And thanks for the heads up on the paperwork.

 

[Adios]

Plus, we did divorce them, and we still have to pass them on the stairs every day? I hope I could still be so pleasant about it, were the tables turned.

We didn't divorce the French. We left a club they are also members of because the terms of membership didn't please the majority of us. If they hold a grudge about that its down to them for stupidly taking it personally.

 

[kof]

not sure what the problem is here. UK is now a 3rd country and customs will deal with 3rd countries as they want or have to. It's always been that way for say a U.S. or Canadian boat arriving or leaving the EU.

Before the EU I sailed from Dublin to France as a young lad and stopped in Saint Marys in the Scillys on the way. Anchored, up went the Q flag and we waited, and waited and waited. Eventually he arrived out in a launch decked out in his blazor, white cap and ribbons and took an instant dislike (we're a bunch of paddys so I can understand that) to us. Spent the next 2 hours going through paperwork, dotting the I's and crossing the t's. Then did a full bow to stern search of the boat.

Finally cleared us in but parted with the remark - "Be careful when you go ashore. No antics, no getting drunk. I'll be watching you like a hawk!". Needless to say we instantly got drunk in bar (Mermaid?) got up to some childish antics.

Next time I visited we were part of the EU and therefore no customs. We arrived and departed without so much as a care as we were no longer a 3rd country.

I feel sorry for my UK friends who didn't want any of this but it is the way it is and has to be accepted - and dealing with fussy customs will be an ongoing problem and not solely with the French. Your country voted for this pain so suck it up and accept it.

We didn't divorce the French. We left a club they are also members of because the terms of membership didn't please the majority of us. If they hold a grudge about that its down to them for stupidly taking it personally.

 

[Buck Turgidson]

not sure what the problem is here. UK is now a 3rd country and customs will deal with 3rd countries as they want or have to. It's always been that way for say a U.S. or Canadian boat arriving or leaving the EU.

Before the EU I sailed from Dublin to France as a young lad and stopped in Saint Marys in the Scillys on the way. Anchored, up went the Q flag and we waited, and waited and waited. Eventually he arrived out in a launch decked out in his blazor, white cap and ribbons and took an instant dislike (we're a bunch of paddys so I can understand that) to us. Spent the next 2 hours going through paperwork, dotting the I's and crossing the t's. Then did a full bow to stern search of the boat.

Finally cleared us in but parted with the remark - "Be careful when you go ashore. No antics, no getting drunk. I'll be watching you like a hawk!". Needless to say we instantly got drunk in bar (Mermaid?) got up to some childish antics.

Next time I visited we were part of the EU and therefore no customs. We arrived and departed without so much as a care as we were no longer a 3rd country.

I feel sorry for my UK friends who didn't want any of this but it is the way it is and has to be accepted - and dealing with fussy customs will be an ongoing problem and not solely with the French. Your country voted for this pain so suck it up and accept it.

Sounds like he had you pegged and you didn't disappoint.

And here you are moralising all these years later.

 

[Resolution]

We didn't divorce the French. We left a club they are also members of because the terms of membership didn't please the majority of us. If they hold a grudge about that its down to them for stupidly taking it personally.

You are quite right that we did not divorce the French. We chose to leave a club that included most European countries, and managed to leave in a manner that will have cheesed off most of them. So I think we should be prepared for a stiff reception from not only the French customs, but the Belgians, the Dutch, the Germans .........and of course the Greek customs are having a field day.
Now who has behaved stupidly?
(And yes , it still rankles with me that a narrow 52/48 majority is causing me and many others considerable personal disruption.)