First World Boating Problems...

petem

petem

Well-Known Member
Joined
16 May 2001
Messages
19,106
Location
Cotswolds / Altea
www.fairlineownersclub.com
Fortunately, most of us are lucky enough that we don't have to worry too much about keeping the wolf from door and are able to expend time, energy and money solving first world boating problems. I have my own challenges; finding perspex to match the existing drinks holders, replacing screw caps so that they all match and the like. But my problems are rather feeble compared to some that have been shared with us on these forums over the years....

1) Only last year, Magnum (RIP) who challenged and entertained us with his world class first world problems, had an issue with ice cubes. Apparently the ice made from marina water wasn't to his taste so he was investigating the possibility of having a separate auxiliary tank, filled with "Peckham Spring" or some liquid, purely for making ice. We'll miss Magnum!

2) Continuing the theme of beverages, in 2016 Murv had problems trying to power his Tassimo coffee machine from an inverter. He made a rather feeble attempt to justify this issue by stating that he also used his Tassimo to make tea and hot chocolate for the kids.

3) Underwater lights have created a whole host of first world problems. As recent as March, JFM related the problem that underwater appendages can give when trying to produce a perfectly even underwater light effect.

4) Teak decking is also a recurring theme. Many hours have been spent discussing the relative temperatures underfoot of real teak versus fakey stuff. More debating of the merits of white / black / grey caulking has occurred. More serious is the issue of perfect 'borders', of which MapisM is the forum expert. Woe betide anyone who has an odd border corner with the wood grain running in the wrong direction. An equally serious issue is the devastating effect that a dropped peanut can have on a man's teak deck.

5) Drones have been another cause of first world boating angst. Not only are they easily lost at sea but one has to consider the subject that they are filming. One of my all time favourite first world problems was that of white anti foul. JFM remarked that a white / grubby hull is not de-riguer when being filmed on the plan from ones drone. Easily solved by speccing black for the annual hull painting.

Anyone got any more?!
 
Surface protection? A lot of threads over the best polishers/compounds/waxes/nano coatings have been discussed and indeed the best methods of avoiding falling overboard whilst applying them. A first world problem I fully admit to feeling particularily close to.
 
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petem said:
Fortunately, most of us are lucky enough that we don't have to worry too much about keeping the wolf from door and are able to expend time, energy and money solving first world boating problems. I have my own challenges; finding perspex to match the existing drinks holders, replacing screw caps so that they all match and the like. But my problems are rather feeble compared to some that have been shared with us on these forums over the years....

1) Only last year, Magnum (RIP) who challenged and entertained us with his world class first world problems, had an issue with ice cubes. Apparently the ice made from marina water wasn't to his taste so he was investigating the possibility of having a separate auxiliary tank, filled with "Peckham Spring" or some liquid, purely for making ice. We'll miss Magnum!

2) Continuing the theme of beverages, in 2016 Murv had problems trying to power his Tassimo coffee machine from an inverter. He made a rather feeble attempt to justify this issue by stating that he also used his Tassimo to make tea and hot chocolate for the kids.

3) Underwater lights have created a whole host of first world problems. As recent as March, JFM related the problem that underwater appendages can give when trying to produce a perfectly even underwater light effect.

4) Teak decking is also a recurring theme. Many hours have been spent discussing the relative temperatures underfoot of real teak versus fakey stuff. More debating of the merits of white / black / grey caulking has occurred. More serious is the issue of perfect 'borders', of which MapisM is the forum expert. Woe betide anyone who has an odd border corner with the wood grain running in the wrong direction. An equally serious issue is the devastating effect that a dropped peanut can have on a man's teak deck.

5) Drones have been another cause of first world boating angst. Not only are they easily lost at sea but one has to consider the subject that they are filming. One of my all time favourite first world problems was that of white anti foul. JFM remarked that a white / grubby hull is not de-riguer when being filmed on the plan from ones drone. Easily solved by speccing black for the annual hull painting.

Anyone got any more?!
Click to expand...

No, but it is a salutary reminder of how pathetic these things are compared to what some around the world are enduring right now.
 
I have a small spider crack in the deck and the roof is a bit chalky.
These things don't keep me awake at night with worry.

My other first world problem was "The engine on my tender doesn't run well because the carb float bowl gasket leaks".
Now fixed :)

But yes, you are right, none of us have the problem of "My house has been flattened and now I must trek across the desert with the family members that can walk and a couple of trolleys".

.
 
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I'm not sure you're appreciating the severity of the issue of not having coffee to hand in the mornings!
Anyhow, a pure sine wave inverter fixed the issue although I've gone back to a grinder and cafetiere as I much prefer the taste.

Another issue we'd been struggling along with is that the drinks cabinet was designed to hold multiple bottles of wine but wouldn't hold larger bottles and the odd shaped ones (the wife's square diasaronno bottles for example.)
This was resolved by fabricating a new plywood insert with more appropriate cut-outs :)

Also, the heads and galley can get very cold on winter morning's, so this years project is a heating upgrade which should make life a little less arduous.
 
Murv's post reminds me
At a very busy Southampton boatshow about 25 years ago. A known impulsive customer comes on the stand is is very taken by the latest offering from one of the big boys. after a tour round the boat he says right I have one how much deposit do you need.
Cheque was duly written and suggestion was made to customer that he should come to the office after show where the full specification (colours of furnishings, timber choice additional extras from a large and comprehensive list) could be decided away from what was those days the hustle and bustle of busy stand at the show.
The customer very forcibly said no I want to do the spec now so they sat down with the build sheets colour options sampler and options list with the sales rep resigned to spending and hour or more sorting the spec and missing the opportunity of finding another potential customer. The customer then announces I want it exactly the same as this but I want 1 litre bottle cut-outs in the drinks cabinet and a second boathook outside the patio doors.

Don't know if this is in the right place but was very amusing.
 
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Murv said:
. This was resolved by fabricating a new plywood insert with more appropriate cut-out :)
Click to expand...

H,mm, you may well have to go and stand in the corner, what you should have posted is...

after some discussions with interior designers (preferably Italian) and experienced marine architects ( English of course) your appointed project manager contacted a number of advanced polymer matrix composites producers for comments as to possible damage that could be caused by wine getting spilled on the surface of your new bespoke custom insert.
A problem,of course could then be getting the correct typeface for the word "Fairline" embossed in Platinum on the surface.
In order to avoid several tedious posts from Boris and Rees Mogg supporters you may not wish to openly discuss as to if the dimensions should be in imperial or metric. :)
 
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oldgit said:
H,mm, you may well have to go and stand in the corner, what you should have posted is...

after some discussions with interior designers (preferably Italian) and experienced marine architects ( English of course) your appointed project manager contacted a number of advanced polymer matrix composites producers for comments as to possible damage that could be caused by wine getting spilled on the surface of your new bespoke custom insert.
A problem,of course could then be getting the correct typeface for the word "Fairline" embossed in Platinum on the surface.
In order to avoid several tedious posts from Boris and Rees Mogg supporters you may not wish to openly discuss as to if the dimensions should be in imperial or metric. :)
Click to expand...

I apologise unreservedly.
The above is, of course, a true account of what actually happened. . And, rumours that I contemplated scrawling "Fairline" at a jaunty angle across said insert with my finest crayons are robustly denied.



I also now want a second boathook.
 
I've just had my boat serviced and for the first time in years there was nothing else found to be broken/worn out/on the way out. It just needed a normal service, no surprise bills for thousands of euros, no leaky steering rams, no milky oil in drive, no clogged heat exchangers, nothing.

Of course I now expect serious trouble part way through the season....
 
I think it was Hurricane who proposed a Very Useful device some years ago. He wanted to link the GPS and plotters to a serried rank of small flagpoles on the radar arch. The GPS would determine where the boat was in relation to international maritime borders, and then at the correct position, issue an automated command to the appropriate flag unit to raise or lower a neatly furled courtesy ensign.

Sadly, I think it did not go into mass production. :)
 
petem said:
More serious is the issue of perfect 'borders', of which MapisM is the forum expert.
Woe betide anyone who has an odd border corner with the wood grain running in the wrong direction.
Click to expand...
Oi, at least I explained that there's a functional reason for that, i.e. avoiding to create a weak point prone to cracking.
What about all the AnCam fans, who installed the thing just to avoid going to the bow when pulling the hook? :D :rolleyes:
 
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