Brokers' English

[Chiara’s slave]

Some of the East coast sailing smacks are like the ship of Theseus with virtually all the timber being replaced in successive rebuilds with old timber used as pattern for new repairs so considered to date from original construction - Maybe many others are - Helps for marketing to people who want a vintage classic without too much work to do but doesn't change how special and unique they are

There are several XODs that could be renamed ‘Trigger’s broom’. The only original part is the cast iron keel.

 

[mrming]

Saw a good one this morning - "THIS BOAT MUST BE VIEWED TO APPRECIATE HER CONDITION." Needless to say that condition is poor.

 

[Blueboatman]

There are several XODs that could be renamed ‘Trigger’s broom’. The only original part is the cast iron keel.

Or “ the much improved….” ?

As a matter of curiosity are the fleet unrestricted in choice of sailcloth and rigging eg black sails and dynema these days?
Anyone toyed with a lead keel yet?

 

[westernman]

Or “ the much improved….” ?

As a matter of curiosity are the fleet unrestricted in choice of sailcloth and rigging eg black sails and dynema these days?
Anyone toyed with a lead keel yet?

Or one in depleted uranium?

 

[Buck Turgidson]

Watched a Berthons Oyster 54 video today where Madam informed me that the mainsheet was in the right place! Very reassuring.

 

[westernman]

Watched a Berthons Oyster 54 video today where Madam informed me that the mainsheet was in the right place! Very reassuring.

Yes, that particular madam (who I have talked to on several occasions) does talk a lot of bollocks at times.

 

[mrming]

Real project boats aren't simply listed for sale. They "come to the market".

 

[Stemar]

Real project boats aren't simply listed for sale. They "come to the market".

"An opportunity rarely seen on the market..."

 

[doug748]

"The headlining needs attention in some places - an easy winter project"

"The interior has been stripped out giving a unique opportunity for the new owner to create the boat of his dreams."

And for the classic boat buff:

"A little localised rot in one corner of the cockpit"

 

[Blueboatman]

A rare opportunity to put your own signature on this now iconic piece of maritime history..

And my 2 favourites: “Most of the hard work has been done….”

“Owing to a change in the owners plans, this boat…..”

To be fair, what is challenging to someone else can, in realty, be your dream boat if realistically you have the time, inclination, skills, patience,budget,location and tools… and like the marque!

 

[Rappey]

A quick written advert (made up)

"33ft sailing boat for sale. Long keel. Bmc diesel. Nice sails. Mahogany interior. Diesel heating. Baby Blake heads. 3 burner domestic. Wooden ceiling. Beams."


Now i ask AI to enhance it -


Timeless 33ft Classic Sailing Yacht – Elegance, Comfort & Adventure

Step aboard this stunning 33ft sailing yacht, where classic craftsmanship meets modern comfort. Designed for the true sailing enthusiast, this long-keel beauty offers exceptional seaworthiness, graceful lines, and a rich mahogany interior that exudes warmth and character. Whether you dream of coastal cruising, offshore passages, or an elegant liveaboard lifestyle, this yacht is ready to take you there in style.

Exquisite Features & Timeless Craftsmanship:​

Superior Sailing Performance – The long keel ensures smooth, stable handling in all conditions, making her a joy to sail.

Reliable & Efficient Power – Fitted with a well-maintained BMC diesel engine, offering dependability and efficiency for extended voyages.

Luxury Mahogany Interior – Step below deck to a world of traditional elegance, where beautifully finished mahogany joinery creates a warm and inviting atmosphere.

All-Season Comfort – Stay warm and cozy year-round with the diesel heating system, perfect for crisp morning sails or winter adventures.

Gourmet Galley – Prepare meals with ease on the three-burner domestic stove, surrounded by ample storage and classic wooden finishes.

Prestigious Baby Blake Heads – Featuring the renowned Baby Blake marine toilet, a symbol of timeless quality and reliability.

Character & Charm – Rich wooden ceilings with exposed beams enhance the sense of craftsmanship, making every moment aboard feel special.

This yacht is more than just a vessel—it’s a lifestyle, a statement, and an invitation to explore the world with grace and confidence.

If you’re looking for a yacht with soul, style, and seafaring prowess, this is the one.

Viewings available by appointment – serious inquiries only.

Don't miss the chance to own a true classic—contact now for more details!


Was meant to be 3 burner dometic stove. My bad.
At least it's avoided a certain female yacht broker saying and enhancing "she" in every other sentence with her soulless voice
AI even found me some boats for sale based on my original script.

 

[Stemar]

To be fair, what is challenging to someone else can, in realty, be your dream boat if realistically you have the time, inclination, skills, patience,budget,location and tools… and like the marque!

Very true - look at Talley Ho. All the same, I'll always do my best to discourage someone from taking on a project. If they listen, I've saved them a mountain of misery, because they didn't have what it takes to see it through. If they don't listen, one of two things will happen. Either they'll see it though, in which case, I'll happily admit I was wrong and supply the champagne for the launch, or the mountain of misery will arrive, and I'll bite my tongue to avoid saying I told you so.

 

[zoidberg]

How would AI enhance re-focus brighten augment realign highlight tart up the photos...?

 

[Stemar]

A quick written advert (made up)

"33ft sailing boat for sale. Long keel. Bmc diesel. Nice sails. Mahogany interior. Diesel heating. Baby Blake heads. 3 burner domestic. Wooden ceiling. Beams."


Now i ask AI to enhance it -


Timeless 33ft Classic Sailing Yacht – Elegance, Comfort & Adventure

Step aboard this stunning 33ft sailing yacht, where classic craftsmanship meets modern comfort. Designed for the true sailing enthusiast, this long-keel beauty offers exceptional seaworthiness, graceful lines, and a rich mahogany interior that exudes warmth and character. Whether you dream of coastal cruising, offshore passages, or an elegant liveaboard lifestyle, this yacht is ready to take you there in style.

Exquisite Features & Timeless Craftsmanship:​

Superior Sailing Performance – The long keel ensures smooth, stable handling in all conditions, making her a joy to sail.

Reliable & Efficient Power – Fitted with a well-maintained BMC diesel engine, offering dependability and efficiency for extended voyages.

Luxury Mahogany Interior – Step below deck to a world of traditional elegance, where beautifully finished mahogany joinery creates a warm and inviting atmosphere.

All-Season Comfort – Stay warm and cozy year-round with the diesel heating system, perfect for crisp morning sails or winter adventures.

Gourmet Galley – Prepare meals with ease on the three-burner domestic stove, surrounded by ample storage and classic wooden finishes.

Prestigious Baby Blake Heads – Featuring the renowned Baby Blake marine toilet, a symbol of timeless quality and reliability.

Character & Charm – Rich wooden ceilings with exposed beams enhance the sense of craftsmanship, making every moment aboard feel special.

This yacht is more than just a vessel—it’s a lifestyle, a statement, and an invitation to explore the world with grace and confidence.

If you’re looking for a yacht with soul, style, and seafaring prowess, this is the one.

Viewings available by appointment – serious inquiries only.

Don't miss the chance to own a true classic—contact now for more details!


Was meant to be 3 burner dometic stove. My bad.
At least it's avoided a certain female yacht broker saying and enhancing "she" in every other sentence with her soulless voice
AI even found me some boats for sale based on my original script.

Why are we messing around with AI when all we need is an estate agent or boat broker?

 

[newtothis]

Why are we messing around with AI when all we need is an estate agent or boat broker?

Artificial intelligence vs real ignorance.

 

[mrming]

When AI meets ads for used boats it can only end badly given the quality of the writing it will have been “trained” on,

 

[Chiara’s slave]

Or “ the much improved….” ?

As a matter of curiosity are the fleet unrestricted in choice of sailcloth and rigging eg black sails and dynema these days?
Anyone toyed with a lead keel yet?

Apologies for the late reply, we were in the Azores when I posted, then Atlantic crossing followed by loss of plot The XOD class tries to be highly regulated. Definitely no carbon sails, dyneema is allowed in running rigging. Adding lead to bring your keel up to class maximum is allowed, whether it makes you faster is up for debate. Having a fatter crew works better.

 

[Mister E]

I have never seen an advertisement that says "having a fatter crew helps"

 

[Chiara’s slave]

I have never seen an advertisement that says "having a fatter crew helps"

The crew that has pretty consistently swept all before them in recent years has an all up weight of 56st between 3 of them. Sure, he’s very good, but then so are quite a few others in the class, a fair few Olympic medals in there. Yeoman, Warden-Owen, Bedford, Batt, and many other top sailors with or without Olympic credentials in fact. The evidence says eat more pies. We are about 37 st all up. When it’s a bit windy, anything over 18kn say, the big boys can just roll us.

 

[mrming]

"Fast becoming a classic".

Didn't age well, of interest to a few only.