Arsey Poncey answerphone messages

[claymore]

Just phoned Jimi at work and drew his answerphone

I have never in all my chuff heard such syrupy twaddle.

 

[oldharry]

"Hello, this is Old harrys refridgerator speaking, The answerphone is out at the moment, and no one else is answering the phone, so if you leave a message, I will stick it to my door with one of those magnet things"

Deleted within 30 minutes by irate teenage son - Not funny, Dad!

 

[fisherman]

My kids got rid of:"you have reached the rock'n roll helpline: depending on the service you require please press;
1 for the money
2 for the show.......

 

[Guest]

Truckin' Hilarious! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif Teenagers have no sense of humour! Too busy tryin' ta be Cooooooooool.

 

[Kilter]

[ QUOTE ]
I have never in all my chuff heard such syrupy twaddle

[/ QUOTE ]
He was talking rubbish about his toupee?

 

[Twister_Ken]

"Hello. Everyone's gone 'ome. There's no one here, 'cept me on Security. Oh and two fierce Alsatian dogs, Tyrone and Tyson."

(sounds of one dog growling, then of another howling painfully).

"Stop that Tyson, Tyrone's a boy dog too."

Banner Marketing, circa 1990.

 

[Kilter]

/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[MoodySabre]

"You know what to do and how to do it"

"Please leave a message after the pidgeon ... (pidgeon noise)"
Made me laugh so I couldn't leave a message.

 

[Porthandbuoy]

"We're oot. Please do not leave a message after the tone. Try calling back later."

 

[StanFolds]

My son deleted "The village idiot or his son will call you when we find how this works"
Currently "Sunshine Home for Wayward Girls, Matron spealing"
Stan

 

[Cornishman]

In a voice sounding suspiciously like Freddie Flintoff:

We're all out - as usual. Leaving your message after the sound of burning cricket stumps

 

[ParaHandy]

akshally the ans-ph must be new because normally you get the switch board and the conversation (with her) normally goes like this:
erm .. Jimi?
Who?
you know, the wee jock?
Surname, please?
erm .. dinnae know but he's short and normally has a deid sheep on his heid and comes frae East Kulbride ..
(muttering in background and exasperated) What department?
well .. i dunno about deportment. he's nae awfy big even when he's upright
click ... brrrr ...