janeK
Well-Known Member
Washington D.C., August 13, 2004
Congress announced today that the Office of President of the United States will be outsourced overs as of September 30th, the end of this fiscal year. The move is being made to save $400,000 a year in salary, help reduce a record $ 521-billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead.
"The cost savings will be significant" says Congressman Adam Smith (R -Wash) who, with the aid of the General Accounting Office, has studied the outsourcing of American jobs. "We simply can no longer afford this level of outlay, and remain competitive on the world stage,"
Congressman Smith said. Exporting American jobs has been a popular trend lately, at the urging of President Bush and other leaders of his party.
Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of the termination of his position.
He will receive health coverage, expenses and salary until his final day of employment. After that, with a two week waiting period, he will then be eligible for $ 240 a week from unemployment insurance, but only for 13 weeks. Unfortunately he will not be able to receive state Medicaid health insurance coverage as his unemployment benefits are over the currently mandated limit.
"I'm in shock," Mr. Bush stated. "I thought for sure I'd have some job security>around this place. I have no idea what I'll do now," he lamented.
Preparations have been quietly underway for some> time for the job move, under the codename "East of Eden", which is said to have a Biblical precedent.
Sanji Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai, India, will be assuming the Office of President of the United States as of July 1. Mr. Singh was born in the United States while his parents were here on student visas, thus making him eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 USD a month, appropriate for India, but with no health coverage or other benefits. Due to the time difference between the US and India, Mr. Singh will be working primarily at night, when departments of the US Government will be open in the daytime USA.
"I am excited to serve in this position," Mr. Singh stated in an exclusive interview. "Working nights will let me keep my day job at the American Express
call center. I always knew I was going to be President someday."
Congress urged patience when calling Mr. Singh. He may not be fully aware of all the issues involved with his new position. A Congressional Spokesperson noted, however, that Mr. Singh has been given a script tree to follow which will allow him to respond to most topics of concern.
The Spokesperson further noted that "additional savings will be realized, as these scripting tools have already been used by Mr. Bush.
The scripts will enable Mr. Singh to provide an answer without having to fully understand any issue."
Congress continues to explore other outsourcing possibilities including that of Vice-President, most Cabinet positions, and possibly entire government departments. For example, the CIA was secretly outsourced to Israel's Mossad decades ago -- the exact date is not known because of National Security.
Reports from London indicate that England is considering similar outsourcing, starting with Prime Minister Tony Blair.
Reuters
<hr width=100% size=1>If work was so good, the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.
Congress announced today that the Office of President of the United States will be outsourced overs as of September 30th, the end of this fiscal year. The move is being made to save $400,000 a year in salary, help reduce a record $ 521-billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead.
"The cost savings will be significant" says Congressman Adam Smith (R -Wash) who, with the aid of the General Accounting Office, has studied the outsourcing of American jobs. "We simply can no longer afford this level of outlay, and remain competitive on the world stage,"
Congressman Smith said. Exporting American jobs has been a popular trend lately, at the urging of President Bush and other leaders of his party.
Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of the termination of his position.
He will receive health coverage, expenses and salary until his final day of employment. After that, with a two week waiting period, he will then be eligible for $ 240 a week from unemployment insurance, but only for 13 weeks. Unfortunately he will not be able to receive state Medicaid health insurance coverage as his unemployment benefits are over the currently mandated limit.
"I'm in shock," Mr. Bush stated. "I thought for sure I'd have some job security>around this place. I have no idea what I'll do now," he lamented.
Preparations have been quietly underway for some> time for the job move, under the codename "East of Eden", which is said to have a Biblical precedent.
Sanji Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai, India, will be assuming the Office of President of the United States as of July 1. Mr. Singh was born in the United States while his parents were here on student visas, thus making him eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 USD a month, appropriate for India, but with no health coverage or other benefits. Due to the time difference between the US and India, Mr. Singh will be working primarily at night, when departments of the US Government will be open in the daytime USA.
"I am excited to serve in this position," Mr. Singh stated in an exclusive interview. "Working nights will let me keep my day job at the American Express
call center. I always knew I was going to be President someday."
Congress urged patience when calling Mr. Singh. He may not be fully aware of all the issues involved with his new position. A Congressional Spokesperson noted, however, that Mr. Singh has been given a script tree to follow which will allow him to respond to most topics of concern.
The Spokesperson further noted that "additional savings will be realized, as these scripting tools have already been used by Mr. Bush.
The scripts will enable Mr. Singh to provide an answer without having to fully understand any issue."
Congress continues to explore other outsourcing possibilities including that of Vice-President, most Cabinet positions, and possibly entire government departments. For example, the CIA was secretly outsourced to Israel's Mossad decades ago -- the exact date is not known because of National Security.
Reports from London indicate that England is considering similar outsourcing, starting with Prime Minister Tony Blair.
Reuters
<hr width=100% size=1>If work was so good, the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.