Urgent and random non boaty help required

Or my vegetable patch. It's not the ****ting per se that I object to, it's the digging up all the seeds I've planted.

Pete
In the days of non political correctness, many years ago, there was a tom that insisted on sh itting on and digging up my garden. I sat in wait with the trusty .410, it came and di d the biz, I took carefull aim and gave an almighty "Dirty fekking bast ard!" It took off. Did you know, cats, on full chat, use their legs in pairs, with the front two coming in between the back two? BANG went the .410, chunks of fur flew off its ars e! It kept going, cleared a 4 ft wall in one leap and I never saw it again!
Stu
 
Some posters on this thread have suggested you kill your cat.

I disagree.

Your cat has clearly demonstrated a well developed sense of musical taste by sh*tting in you banjo. You should capitalise on this - get him on the judging panel of the X factor, or similar - some of the contestants would benefit from having a cat sh*t on their heads, and it would make good television.

:D
 
Don't ask what I was searching for when I dug up THIS thread, but biological washing powder solution acts as a great fix. On account of the enzymes, innit. Has to be bio otherwise it doesn't work, and you HAVE to do something biological to break up the smell rather than mask it, otherwise the cat can detect it and may return to the same spot for the same purpose.

Sorry it's late, but... you're welcome. :)
 
Despite my frequent and random questions about different aspects of seamanship, I have a real problem which has little to do with boats but requires some attention.

To pass the time while solo sailing, I play the 5 string banjo. Every week I put the banjo in the car, drive it down to the boat and load it up with all the other supplies.

This week I found out that our kitten has taken a dump inside my banjo case. Not so bad you say? Just wash the case. The problem is that I found this out after driving 50 miles with the banjo in the case.

So on opening my case I found my beloved instrument caked, and I mean really caked in cat sh*t.

Thus two and a half hours on Friday afternoon was spend cursing the cat and cleaning the banjo with everything I had on the boat.

And so it is clean. Perfectly clean. The problem is, it still smells of cat sh*t. I have tried almost everything I can imagine: bleach, soapy water, vinegar, polish, baking powder and finally aftershave. The result; my banjo now smells of cat sh*t and aftershave.

I can't scrub it as it is the woodwork on the case and it will damage it. Similarly, I can't boil it or heat it for the same reasons.

Please help.Any suggestions?

What dont you ever hear said about Banjo players? "Thats the Banjo players Ferrari" or "She's sleeping with the Banjo player" - with due respect to Billy Conelly who said it first!
 
Despite my frequent and random questions about different aspects of seamanship, I have a real problem which has little to do with boats but requires some attention.

To pass the time while solo sailing, I play the 5 string banjo. Every week I put the banjo in the car, drive it down to the boat and load it up with all the other supplies.

This week I found out that our kitten has taken a dump inside my banjo case. Not so bad you say? Just wash the case. The problem is that I found this out after driving 50 miles with the banjo in the case.

So on opening my case I found my beloved instrument caked, and I mean really caked in cat sh*t.

Thus two and a half hours on Friday afternoon was spend cursing the cat and cleaning the banjo with everything I had on the boat.

And so it is clean. Perfectly clean. The problem is, it still smells of cat sh*t. I have tried almost everything I can imagine: bleach, soapy water, vinegar, polish, baking powder and finally aftershave. The result; my banjo now smells of cat sh*t and aftershave.

I can't scrub it as it is the woodwork on the case and it will damage it. Similarly, I can't boil it or heat it for the same reasons.

Please help.Any suggestions?

Sorry, but this made me genuinely LOL.
 

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