The Mrs wants me to sell the boat

oGaryo said:
Nail on the head I reckon.. Debbie does still go on the boat but I think it's lost its attraction now that pretty much all of her mates have had a go. and as you say, both boys are now into other things. I think I am going to have to get really good at single handed boating
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Does she know just how much your boat-time means to you, especially in light of recent events?
 
benjenbav said:
Seriously, I think this is a not uncommon tension which needs to be resolved.

imho you buy a boat, maybe because it's something to bring the family together in a shared activity. You imagine sunny days with the kids jumping in and out of sparkling water while you and your beloved look on fondly. You've made it. Not only wealth but the perfect family.

Then you find that you quite like getting oily as you service the drives on a freezing February day, chatting to the gnarly old seadogs on the dock - mebbe share a nip of scotch from your flask. Man, those are the days you remember. Plus that time when it blew up a hoolie, sheesh - took a coupla greenies over the top before getting back home. Never more alive.

But the kids are at football practice every Saturday; the missus has had enough of running them round here and there and everywhere. Where the flippin' heck were you when Charlotte had to be collected from her friend Siobhan's house? I'll tell you. You were fiddling about with that fornicating boat again, nattering to your mates as per blimmin usual. Whadderya mean you bought it for both of us? That's the best one I've heard in a long time. I'll tell you when I next want to see your boat; never.

Ahem.

But on the other hand, the broader view is perhaps that the boat keeps you out of mischief. If it's a choice between that and some of the other possibilities which might occur when you have time on your hands then perhaps it's the lesser of two weevils.

All, as I say, imho. :D
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genius
 
Just explain to her how hard it is to sell ANY Boat at the moment! I mean it could take two years or more, (particularly as you want at least 20k more than it's worth! :cool: ) don't tell her that bit! In the meantime something will come up to help you with the mortgage! Or she may even change her mind :)
Ps, forgot to say that Apollo Duck offer free adverts and in my experience nobody ever answers them! So you can genuinely say its up for sale!
 
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I think the traditional response to this problem is to go with the flow, and advertise the boat for sale - an advert featuring a boat advertised for £100k that is only worth £50k will ensure that nothing happens, but you are seen to be trying to do the right thing.

Alternatively, you may choose to agree to the sale with alacrity and, at the same time, leave literature scattered about the house concerning flying lessons and brochures for the new Robinson R66 single turbine; that should ensure that the status quo remains unbroken...

;-)
 
Since we're only a few months away from the summer, surely it'd not be unreasonable for 'just one more summer' with the boat as a 'final fairwell'. That's, on paper, only 9 months or so that you have to make arrangements to defer any extension costs (which you say you can afford not to do anyway), it then gives you 9 months to think of a better plan or and 9 months to 'prove' that you CAN afford both.
 
No point keeping the boat if you both do not enjoy using it, sell the boat ,biuld,sell move house, when completed look again you might find that you do not want the hassle of boat ownership ,and prefere doing something else together,
not as if boats are going up in price,
 
I have always said that life is for living not for existing, Monday to Friday I exist, weekends and holidays I live, our boat has bought us a wealth of life experiences, not the kind you get sat in an extension, we have stories to tell, which you don't get from walking round b and q on a Saturday in July! plus our eldest is in uni studying to be a commercial skipper and our yougest wants to follow same footsteps all because of the boat,
I can safley say that we and our kids would not be the people we are now if we didn't have a boat.
I think you know which camp I'm in :-)
 
epervier said:
Next time you and Debs are shopping in a DIY store, look for a large tin of Manup and stop being a pussy. this ain't a dress rehearsal, it's life, you're only here once, live it.
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read my initial post Mr Perv :) "selling the boat isn't a solution" deposit has already been paid on next years berthing fees, this is all about damage limitation
 
I'm gobsmacked. I thought Debs loved the boat. I also find myself in a bit of a sticky quandary here as I know both of you. Hmmm...this is a tricky one. No...this is potentially an impossible situation! How about, trade the boat for a rib and move to a bigger house near the boat? That way, you both get to do your day boating and Debs isn't a whole weekend boat widow.
Sorry Debs but I'd be heartbroken if Chris told me he wants to sell the boat :(. (and anyway...tell Debs I'd miss her at the Bursledon Regatta so you can't sell!!)
L
:)
 
lisilou said:
I'm gobsmacked. I thought Debs loved the boat. I also find myself in a bit of a sticky quandary here as I know both of you. Hmmm...this is a tricky one. No...this is potentially an impossible situation! How about, trade the boat for a rib and move to a bigger house near the boat? That way, you both get to do your day boating and Debs isn't a whole weekend boat widow.
Sorry Debs but I'd be heartbroken if Chris told me he wants to sell the boat :(. (and anyway...tell Debs I'd miss her at the Bursledon Regatta do you can't sell!!)
L
:)
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thanks for the post Lisa, to be honest I don't think it'll happen.. I think it's more a case of we've not had a holiday abroad for about 4 years now as we've been using the boat(s) so much.. that's getting fixed in 2015 with at least 1 holiday abroad. we're moving the boat to Town Quay too to save a few quid on berthing fees as we'll not use the boat so much with some weekends no doubt taken up with the extension and a couple of weeks away abroad. Deb did her PB2 this year too an really enjoyed it so that doesn't make sense, it may just be a winter blues thing.. we'll have the extension completed before the summer kicks in and I am hopeful she'll see sense and realise it's a great asset to have, not from a financial sense but a means to socialise with good folk such as yourself and Chris
 
Hmm, I am lucky as Mrs P just loves sailing but it does remind me of something a long time back.....

I have been on motorbikes since I was 16 (well a moped then) but when I got married (24) I promised that I wouldn't have one.

Time passed and I really, really, really needed to get back on one and she was trying to hold me to the promise.

So I eventually burst and said words to the effect:
Me: "look, I work my effing nuts off day and night and what have I got to show for it? Me, just me?. You have the house you want, the car you want, the kitchen you want, the furniture and decor you want, the boat you want, the second home you want. What have I got just to treat me for all my work? kcuf all !" [I was very restrained and didn't add "and the kids you want"]
She: you have your hifi
Me: you share that as well ! Come on, name one thing that all that work has got for me.
She : er (silence)
Me: Right, I am having a motorbike again then
She: all right !

Its worth a try on the basis that some bloody extension (no doubt, to an already sodding big house) is hardly going to be memorable when you write your memoirs. You have worked very hard I expect and you are entitled to something for YOU. They think nothing of demanding it for themselves.
Ask her how she can possibly ask you to give up boating - the one pleasure you have in life. What is she giving up in order to fund the extension ?(then list the things she values most - you know her best). You will give up boating if she gives up her pleasures to equivalent value (dodgy ground if she knows how much boating costs !!!)

Good luck - boat ownership is the freedom to dream about it all the time you are not on it.

PS: the above makes Mrs P sound like a gold digger, she isn't at all:)
 
Of course, if you're selling the boat then the extension plans will need revising for the 5 more bikes that you'll need to buy instead ... of course, it's not just 5 bikes, but extra wheelsets, lycra, GPSs, turbo trainers (virtual reality ones with 50" TV screens) etc etc ...

;)
 
kanajobe48 said:
I have always said that life is for living not for existing, Monday to Friday I exist, weekends and holidays I live, our boat has bought us a wealth of life experiences, not the kind you get sat in an extension, we have stories to tell, which you don't get from walking round b and q on a Saturday in July! plus our eldest is in uni studying to be a commercial skipper and our yougest wants to follow same footsteps all because of the boat,
I can safley say that we and our kids would not be the people we are now if we didn't have a boat.
I think you know which camp I'm in :-)
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Ditto with a capital dit!
 
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