retort wanted...

[snowleopard]

motoring along a channel today, met a small motor boat coming the other way. as i got further and further to the right hand side he still insisted on squeezing between me and the buoys and gesticulating at me to move over. it seems to happen all the time and i need a concise phrase to shout as they pass, to the effect of 'drive on the right/ go and read the col regs/ they do apply even in cornwall/ no, YOU move over.....'

any suggestions?

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[jimi]

"Awa' an bile yer heid ya eejet ...If ah wantid tae get sae close tae the like o' ye I'd hae bought Gay News!"

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[powerskipper]

could we have that in english please jimi.

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Julie

 

[Mike21]

It's ok Jimi, I translated it for her

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[flaming]

Buy a huge battering ram of an anchor and sail with it on your bow roller. make sure there are a few "cosmetic" dents in the vicinity of the anchor.
No retort will ever be necessary........

Or possibly you could keep a few Col Regs handouts and a big marker pen in the cockpit and then simply mark the apropriate section and give them out as you pass.

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[Victorious]

A badly mangled pullpit on your boat......and an inane grin on your face would do the trick.

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[Sybarite]

Reminds me of a VHF exchange I heard not so long ago. A very cultured Etonian type accent - I assumed RN - asked laconically over the waves " What the f--- are you doing? Wake up you f-----g idiot..."

Does this help?

John

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[Rowana]

Reminds me . .

Aberdeen trawler skipper to RN vessel . . .

"Hey you wi' the grey funnel . . Get oot o' ma fu**in' road.

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[Twister_Ken]

As you reach the point of closest approach:

You "Excuse me, but is this the channel for Liskeard?"
Him "Yes"
You. "Well, would you mind awfully if we f***ing shared it?"

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