Racial Harmony

[jimi]

An old friend of mine has begged me to skipper his yacht in a yacht race in a couple of weeks. Being of mild mannered nature I don't wish to offend my friend by refusing but feel I'm insufficiently aggressive for the cut and thrust of Solent race. I would appreciate some advice on how I should respond to my friends request. If the advice is "Go for it!" then I'd also really like some advice on tactics.

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[Twister_Ken]

Ah yes, the \"friend\" tactic.

Come off it. You fancy racing Glen Rosa. Be a man and admit it.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.writeforweb.com/twister1>Let's Twist Again</A>

 

[jimi]

Re: Ah yes, the \"friend\" tactic.

Well .. I was practising with the spinnaker of St Catherines yesterday where nobody could see the shenanigans ... not a soul spotted on the South side of the IoW! But really, honest, I do have a friend... and apparently its a Bav 34 that's to be raced!

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[sailbadthesinner]

Re: Ah yes, the "friend" tactic.

I think you should go for it.
Assuming you employ your usual tactic and start half an hour before the gun.

BTW please donot shout i still have hangover from my stag do no1





<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>By 'eck the sun is out</font color=red>

 

[tcm]

Of course, you shd go for it.

The boat-owning mate is looking for exactly the qualities that you are doubting that you have.

Oh, he's not looking for sail-handling or such. He wants gumption, bravado and derring-do. So, arrive smoking a massive cigar and complain with him conspiratorially about things - weather, conditions, rules, timing, everything.

Before setting sail, announce the crew should all partake of dram of lucky Scotch. Act suprised and crestfallen when they refuse a second/third nip, although if they poilish off the bottle you may be in trouble.

Before and during the race, more bravado is shown by laughing at danger. You may have to practise this beforehand. Whatever happens, you cackle maliciously.

Other stuff is to act surprised that they have an engine, roller jib, cups, kettle or food. This always makes people feel great.

Finally, however fast you are going, you should always be quietly annoyed that it doesn't go faster. Put up all the sails and when the rig comes down, don't forget to laugh.

They will all agree that it was a great experience and never ask you again.


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[iangrant]

Re: Ah yes, the \"friend\" tactic.

It wouldn't be that Round the Island one now would it ?

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[jimi]

Re: Ah yes, the \"friend\" tactic.

No .. its a corporate hospitality event where my mate's chartered a boat for his company to compete against some other guys in the same industry ... but none of them have sailed before!!

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[iangrant]

Re: Ah yes, the \"friend\" tactic.

VERY big stress - make sure you settle the gung ho twits with a two hour safety brief!
Good luck
Ian

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[Twister_Ken]

Got the Tee-shirt (now too small)

Did that sort of thing once, something called a the Air Canada Challenge, I think. Twice around the IOW non-stop, in Westerly Buckets. I was the ringer in some design group's entry. Boat sailed like a dog, crew sick as dogs, self and one other did 90% of the work. Lost to some bunch of surveyors or accountants or brokers who took the whole damn thing so seriously that they had been chartering Westerly Buckets for weeks beforehand, and practising. Swine. We had the best designed tee-shirts, though.

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[sailbadthesinner]

Re: Got the Tee-shirt (now too small)

Yes but its a charter boat so Jimi can manfully hold chin out and gaze forward muttering volubly about give no quarter as he races through the fleet on port tack.

As i once pointed out when we had choice of oone grand deposit or 50 pound waiver job.
'if we sink the boat it will be the best 50 quid we have ever spent'
the bloke had nervous look onhim after that until we got back.

i have been on these dos and it does get competitive
last one they had a total ringer on one boat who had done two fastnets and numerous races
knew the area like the back of his hand and just won every race speeding ofinto distance.

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>By 'eck the sun is out</font color=red>

 

[tcm]

Re: Got the Tee-shirt (now too small)

huh. I was hoping for a similar performance from another "ringer" on a charter boat recently. Unfortunately, the ringer failed to understand the (lack of) racing rules, ahem.

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[sailbadthesinner]

Re: ringers

i was under the mistaken impression that the brooding frenchman was infact some wizard trimmer and was waiting for him to leap into action. i thought i was just there to help with the champagne and jelly

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>By 'eck the sun is out</font color=red>