My world has collapsed

[ongolo]

Yesterday, she was splicing and pushing me, this morning she informed me she is leaving me. No arguments no nothing, not for another man either.

I cannot go up into the rigging in a bosun chair, I cannot pick up a mooring rope. Nothing all the plans finished. Just from one second to the next.

So now my options are:

a)sell the boat, almost impossible where I am

b) sell the instruments, the engine, the lead ballast and cut up the hull, tools, lathe gearator and all.

c) find a partner (male, female or couple) to carry on. Impossible to do it by myself

d)get someboy to take a share in the boat.

e) any other Ideas????

down and out ongolo


<hr width=100% size=1>So what......... it floats

 

[Sybarite]

Sorry to hear this Winfried. I have been through it myself. Give yourself the time to adjust to this new situation before you take any irretrievable actions. Once the dust settles you will be surprised how new options open.

John

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[Bejasus]

sorry to hear about your predicament, been there and got the nasty t-shirt. All one can say, is give yourself a little time and breathing space, and try not to make rash decisions, although at the time your options may seem extremely limited. Also been down that road too, and there lies madness.


<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[Johnjo]

Ongolo, going through exactly the same thing myself, she left three weeks ago.
Got my thirteen year old son with me still, but i do not know for how much longer........
And yeh, i know exactly what you are going through....... "HELL"

Anyway i hope things work out okay for you, "me" im just keeping everything crossed.

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[david42]

Ongolo

Something similar happened to me a few years ago and although it was horrible at the time, looking back now I can see that it was for the best. I'd say that the advise so far from other forumites has been sound - don't make any big decisions right now, take your time and let things unfold for a while.

Good luck

David

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[Talbot]

My sympathies, dont let it get you down, and certainly dont make any rash decisions until the dust has settled.

If Ellen can manage on her own, then with a bit of adjustment so can any of us. Just may need some slight modifications to the design of the boat. Hey ho of to the chandlery again.


<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[mikewilkes]

Sorry to hear, but if you read the posts you are not the first and you dam sure wont be the last.
It brings another thought to mind that the ones with the same partners may be a rarity.
As many have said, sit down have a large g&t and dont make any rash desicions.
Just remember that there are a lot of us on these forums who have been there and have survived to ENJOY life again.
Dont give up the ghost and keep posting.

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[numenius]

As all the above - got the T shirt for this one! I absolutely guarantee you that down the line you will turn it round and it will work out OK. Its a haul, but thats a 100% cast iron guarantee. No rash decisions - you can see from above that your not the first and most certainly won't be the last. No rash decisions. Let the mist clear first.

<hr width=100% size=1>http://members.lycos.co.uk/boaty1965/index.htm

 

[Swampyhotdog]

Me too. As a merchant seaman, it wasn't really surprising that marriage wasn't going to work, but I gave it a try. I agree with most people above - no rash decisions.
As a result of breaking up, I ended up living onboard my boat during my leave, (I work month on/off). I wish I'd done it a long time ago!

As far as the crewing issue goes, that shouldn't be a problem, there's always people looking to go sailing.

Keep your head up, you'll find you've got more friends than you thought.

Stu...

<hr width=100% size=1>As with most posts here - my personal opinion - take it or leave it.
Stu

 

[Bejasus]

re: handling the boat on your own, you could always advertise for crew, in say the Cape or Jo'burg. Plenty of students etc around. If I could have the time myself, I would love to come for a while. (too busy at work ,and looking for a motorsailer)Spent a bit of time in the Cape area but never made it to Namibia. No possibility of crew available in Windhoek I suppose.

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[moodycruiser]

Ongolo

Sorry to hear about what has happened to you - 14 years ago I lost my lady - not the female variety, but the boat itself, when I was a hostage in Iraq, and the marine mortgage didn't get paid because of complicated financial issues. Stick with your boat - moving ashore is a backward step and the friends you have as a live aboard just can't be found anywhere else. Keep your chin up and although it looks grim at the moment, just when you least expect it, something turns up for the good. We are back on track now, living aboard, and wild horses wouldn't drag me ashore again.


<hr width=100% size=1>Tony

 

[ongolo]

Thank you everybody for the kind words of support.

It is almost as one has made nice friends here.

To the people who end PM I shall reply by PM.

Thank you guys, trying to pull myself up. A weird pattern has evolved in that. Shall discuss it in a few days.

thanks ongolo




<hr width=100% size=1>So what......... it floats

 

[cliff]

AS someone once said "there are more fish in the sea than ever came out of it" and apart from that Africa is full of jungle bunnies and bush babies.

Chin up and chill for a while then have a look round

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[DavidofMersea]

It would seem that everybody on this BB has had the same experience as yourself and it is good to see that you have friends and sympathy, however, my story is a little more encouraging.

Three and a half years ago my non sailing wife left me - quite by accident, and without trying, two weeks later I met a beautiful blue eyed blond nymphomaniac who is 22 years younger than me - May I wish you the same good luck, if it can happen to me, it could happen to you

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[AndrewB]

Very sorry to hear that. Regarding your sailing dreams, take inspiration from Stingo who reported here exactly the same experience a couple of years ago when his plans were well advanced, but then picked himself up and has gone ahead anyway.

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[cameronke]

Does she have a sister?

Regards
Cameron

<hr width=100% size=1>Work to live, live to sail

 

[DavidofMersea]

No

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[Bejasus]

I found something similar...........err almost, except she's brunette and 14 years younger than me/forums/images/icons/laugh.gif

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[mikewilkes]

Maybe time to look for a new model as mines only 12 years younger!!!

<hr width=100% size=1>

 

[BrianJ]

Re: How about

Her Mum.. wots she like ?
BrianJ

<hr width=100% size=1>BrianJ