Making the sea safe (on 11/12 Oct) …………..

[ParaHandy]

Noooo then ….. seeing as how the RYA cruise to Cherbourg of 40 odd boats had most of ‘em with some bits of pot marker / fishing net / loose warps round their rudder/prop, Para Plumbing & Diving Ltd (Offshore Inc) have determined to clear a safe swathe across ra channel by removing said detritus and diving down to pots etc. This service is available only to subscribers who have signed up (upon parting with their cash two weeks in advance) and they will be given the cleared path co-ordinates during the passage. For an additional sum, subscribers may share in the crustacean catch but customers should beware that the chances of getting the little b*stards out o’ the pots in one piece are not good as the odds are in their favour whilst the animals are still in their natural habitat ……………

Oh .. afore I forget, if perchance a non-subscriber happens to become entangled, then our emergency service is available upon completion of appropriate salvage contract and a chat with our solicitors Sue, Grabbit & Rune.

Yrs sincerely

PPD (Offshore Inc)

Ps this service is only to the boundaries of the cheese eating, surrender monkeys, waters (due to us not wanting to be over there in the van and having to get the drinks in first …




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[HansBlix]

I fink vou are despickable to try and make money vrom your friends in distress … I haf ze good experience over many years of finding very dangerous things – although mostly on land – and ve vill clear ze territory free of charge. My friend, Ulrika, vill be available for comfort and help in vour time of need. It ees poffible zat I vill be unavailable due to appearance at Mr Hutton’s inquiry to explain how iraq dossiers from T Blair were complete bollocks … pls accept apologies in advance …. Although a Mr Campbell haf offered me a lordship (vone of 90 soon to be available) if I keep my mouth shut … Ulrika fancies being something she feels is her entitlement .. a lady and dressing up in real fur and ermin …..



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[sailorman]

u mean that "king tone" might be telling porkies, surly knot

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