Losing your nerve

An observation I had in the 5 years before the economic wheels came off was more and more newbies starting with a large and fast first vessel, but receiving little or now training or help from experienced friends nor instructors, so starting with little confidence or ability. Then having a few embarresing boo-boos, loosing all confidence and staying bolted up in their marina unless it was virtually windlass and no onlookers. It's such a shame to see them staying in the marina when they've invested so much but are just afriad to maneuver out of the marina. €200-700k frozen by fear when a few afternoons with an instructor or pal might liberate them and the investment. Training with a pal or an instructor and especially refresher training in boat handling is a no brainer from an economic point of view, especially for any of us when starting out.
 
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I'm the other way when first starting.. first trip out from Lymington (in calmish water's I might add) and through naivety and probably a good dose of over confidence, was half way to Bournmouth enjoying the thrill until pulled back on course by the ever helpful Mr Wiggo... we were supposed to be heading for Colwell Bay and I swear we'd have ended up in Cornwall if it weren't for Graham :-)

I think it's swings and roundabouts (being a Milton Keynes lad), the more I learn of some aspects of boating through reading and practicing what I've read, the more confident I become (mooring and launching for example), however, the more I learn of how things could have gone pear shaped on that first venture, the more cautious I've become, especially with the kids on board!

Not sure this is a recognition of loss of confidence, more so a realisation that I have much to learn, so it's best to temper the over confidence for a bit before I get myself in to a bit of bother.

I guess the moral of my story is never be afraid or too proud to ask... doing so has avoided a good few mishaps to date ;-)
 
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My experience of having my confidence knocked was coming back into the marina earlier than was planned because the weather starting to deteriate and I changed to the lower helm position. Just as I started to reverse into the finger pontoon the wind gusted from 15 to 30mph, I was using the bow thruster and the boat went in the opposite direction like a cocked hat ‘’bang.’’
Had a lesson with Jane our local instructor and put into practice a different approached to manovering.
This is what I learnt.
1 I cocooned myself from the elements by being in the lower helm.
2 You have to adapt to the elements in stead of doing the same thing
3 Have a contingency plan i.e. (forward in) or moor in a safer area.
4 Don’t be frightened to ask.

Experience can’t be brought.

David
 
I'd bought a new boat and moved into a new marina (to me) and was having real difficulties getting back into the berth every trip out, so much so that I really thought I'd "lost it". It got so bad that I could feel my guts start to tighten as we approached the berth on every return after a day out.

Got a good friend and very competent skipper to come out with me and got him to berth her up for me - he too didn't find it easy and remarked afterwards what a difficult berth I was in with all the worst possible elements combined. It hadn't occurred to me before that it might just be the berth itself that was causing the problem, I'd assumed that I was having difficulty adjusting to the new boat. Took her to a couple of other marinas and got straight in no problems so confirmed to myself that I still "had it" so then approached my own berth with more and rejuvenated confidence and have now cracked it. I just needed a bit of a boost, but it could easily have meant I'd dropped out of boating if I'd become convinced that I was no longer safe as a skipper.
 
They say anyone can leave a berth....... but it takes skill to come back properly.

The adrenalin effect as you berth a boat never goes away, it just reduces as you become more proficient. It goes from negative effect to positive effect, then you become pumped (some call it showing off!)

If there was no adrenalin, there's no drive, and it ceases to become a passion.;)

Don't feel you can't ask for help, because there is plenty out there.
 
Strangely enough I actually felt last week that I had lost my "bottle" a little.

Not really been any distance on the boat this year, just local anchorages within 10-20 miles. Out at the boat last week we decided that we would head to Cala Dor Thursday for a couple of nights returning Saturday.

Forecast and actual weather on Thursday were perfect but checking local, non maritime forecast, for Saturday it looked a bit "iffy" so I changed my mind and headed off to Formentor Bay instead.

I felt at the time that I had "chickened out" as the weather had been glorious all week with no real indication, other than the one local forecast, that it was going to get worse. I mulled this over in my mind all day wondering whether I was just being sensible or had I lost my nerve and if so why. My state of mind wasn't improved when I actually drove by car to Cala Dor on the Friday and found perfect calm conditions there.

However, later that evening the weather did take a turn for the worse and Saturday morning there were high winds and very rough seas, certainly not the weather to be doing a 50 mile cruise in a 34' sportscruiser. Later in the day a raggie visitor arrived in the next berth and he was very shaken by the conditions he had just sailed through.

I have to admit to feeling relief that the weather justified my decision to stay put, and that my gut feeling was based on common sense and not through losing my nerve.
 
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