It's no use crying over spilt milk? Oh Yes it is!

[HinewaisMan]

Rolling my way back downwind from the Solent yesterday, I fancies a cup of tea.

Kettle on, wander down to the fridge to get that almost brand new 2lt milk plastic bottley thing.

Which promptly slips through my fingers, striking the cabin sole bottom down.

As Newton suggested, there was an opposite reaction to this impact which popped the top off followed by a fountain of milk which splashes a surprising distance when it lands, vertically as well as horizontally.

Not that I noticed so much since I was watching in horror as the plastic bottley thing fell over and with a very self satisfied glug glug disgorged a fair proportion of its contents across the cabin sole, much of which disappears down the gaps.

I stepped forward and grabbed at the plastic bottley thing just as the boat rolls!

And slipped in the spilled milk, firstly one foot behind me, then the hand I put out to steady myself slid, nay shot forward, leaving me pretty much flat out and face down in a pool of milk.

My hand, as it shot forward, also knocked the plastic bottley thing, still disgorging its white contents, the length of the cabin - with me scrabbling/sliding on hands and knees behind it, turning the air blue.

Of course, the plastic bottley thing didn't just slide in a straight line, but spun languidly, using centrifugal (or is it centripetal with milk) forces to ensure the maximum possible spread!

This also ensured that when I finally corralled the plastic bottley thing, there wasn't even enough left in it for my cuppa!

So today is being spent lifting and washing every panel of the cabin sole, along with mopping out as much spilled milk as I can from six compartments followed by a good washdown with Miltons Fluid.

Then the wait - what will the pongometer score over the next few, hot, days?

And people tell me I'm lucky to live on a yacht! I weep!

 

[davidej]

My last tears on board was when I made a beautiful fish pie for supper on a night sail across the North Sea.

Just took it out of the oven and put it on the saloon table - smelt divine.

Boat takes a major leap off a wave and the pie falls on the cabin sole.

Loads of glass shards from the broken casserole so I can't even scrape it up and eat it

 

[Bilgediver]

Then the wait - what will the pongometer score over the next few, hot, days?

And people tell me I'm lucky to live on a yacht! I weep!

Looking forward to hearing how you removed all traces including the pong!

 

[[32511]]

If only you had a video camera running, you would have a certain £250 from "You've been framed"

 

[Seatrout]

I weep!

You wept? I was crying with laughter reading the account! A true Buster Keaton moment

 

[[70521]]

that almost brand new 2lt milk plastic bottley thing

That will be your problem then!

All milk onboard goes in a metal doobery and is only ever opened over the sink. Once finished we move onto "dry cow" otherwise known as powdered milk.

Good luck with the clean up job.

 

[mjcoon]

My last tears on board was when I made a beautiful fish pie for supper on a night sail across the North Sea.

Just took it out of the oven and put it on the saloon table - smelt divine.

Boat takes a major leap off a wave and the pie falls on the cabin sole.

Loads of glass shards from the broken casserole so I can't even scrape it up and eat it

I now always take a non-slip mat (or several) with me on flotilla/charter. The yacht may include cockpit cushions but never anything so practical!

As for buying those tall milk cartons instead of several small ones, well... Not quite up to Hoffnung's Barrel of Bricks story, but still a good one!

Mike.

 

[Blueboatman]

So.
First you get to suffer The Loss..
Then you get bilge leaning punishment
With time off for a thorough clean..maybe
And lastly there is Forum Mock n Punish. Argh, trial by fellows

And all the OP wanted was a nice sailing cuppa..!
I have a dodgy brown china teapot wot has done the Atlantic.. Standards and all that( and it makes a teabag go further).. Milk is the very devil though.. Suggest a pre sail decant into a wee ' daily' squirty plastic bottle ?

 

[robmcg]

Well I could cry just thinking the icing on the turd was there was no milk left for a cuppa! I feel your pain

 

[HinewaisMan]

Well I could cry just thinking the icing on the turd was there was no milk left for a cuppa! I feel your pain

Er No! The icing on the turd is that having googled Miltons Fluid and getting rid of the smell of milk this morning .......

...... my ads have all become about breast feeding!

 

[nigelmercier]

I once lost a pint of milk on the back seat of my car. The smell got so bad I had to sell it.

 

[LadyInBed]

Tip - Don't remove the inner seal, just put 2 small holes in it.
It should prevent what happened to you plus it controls the amount of milk delivered when the sea is a bit upperty.
Tip 2 - Put cup on bread board on gambled cooker before pouring anything into it

 

[prv]

Tip - Don't remove the inner seal, just put 2 small holes in it.

Now that's a good idea! Thanks.

Tip 2 - Put cup on bread board on gambled cooker before pouring anything into it

Surely everyone makes tea in the sink?

Pete

 

[SamanthaTabs]

Tip 3 - buy a catamaran! Hehe, sorry couldn't resist that.

 

[mjcoon]

Surely everyone makes tea in the sink?

Pete

Now we could start a whole new thread about whether sinks should have flat bottoms for putting things on but which don't drain readily...

You can combine the features by putting a large pan on the gimbled cooker, but it is still a gamble.

Mike.

 

[jakeroyd]

Reminds me when I knocked over an open bottle of red wine. It glugged all over the saloon cushions.
Cleaned it all up with that marvellous stuff in the purple bottle.

Then I knocked it straight over again!

 

[l'escargot]

The answer is "Simple Solution" from a pet shop - it is enzyme based and sold for neutralising animal pee. Spray it liberally over any surface where the milk may have landed and leave it to dry and the smell will disappear. Also removes red wine stains and will make the heads smell sweeter. Marvellous stuff.

 

[Woodlouse]

For milk I use little sachets of UHT. They don't go off, it never gets spilt and since I only ever use it for tea it's always the right amount.

 

[davidpbo]

I now always take a non-slip mat (or several) with me on flotilla/charter. The yacht may include cockpit cushions but never anything so practical!

As for buying those tall milk cartons instead of several small ones, well... Not quite up to Hoffnung's Barrel of Bricks story, but still a good one!

Mike.

My first thought was "At least he didn't meet an empty barrel of bricks"

My sympathies to you O.P. and a very funny story.

 

[Ripster]

A car valet once told me there are two things you do not want in a car. Spilt milk or cat p1$$. Both very stinky and with the smells being extremely hard to eradicate.