powerskipper
Well-Known Member
different ways have you broken down, had to change plan of a trip due to something. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
How many
- Thread starter powerskipper
- Start date
hlb
RIP
Now children if your all sitting comfortable, then I’ll begin.
We kept our last boat. A Princess 33. In Pwllheli in North Wales.
Now Wales is great apart from the Welsh but theres no where to go to except Portmadock which is only about seven miles round the corner. So for any visits for more than a couple of days. Ireland is the next easiest option.
Now every year we plan (Well I do.) an extended world cruise, which lasts about three or four weeks.
This one was planned for a far away place called Scotland, but taking the scenic route via Ireland.
So bright and early, about eleven o’clock one summers morning. Of’s we sets for Wicklow, it’s about 65 miles from Pwlleli and the course takes you through the Bardsey sound. Bardsey is a small Island about a mile off the coast and the sea between has a fearsome reputation. But anyway we sploshes through that and on to Wicklow, a place we’ve been to many times before so nowt more to be said about that! Next stop was either Dun Laoghaire or Howth, cant remember now but that’s Dublin for Colin and other thickies.
The next stop was Carlingford Lock. It was here that the weather turned distinctly lumpy, so we’re
hold up for three day in a not to pleasant spot. Now on the fourth day, her indoors who hates sea unless its been plastered down dead flat. Announces that its time to go. Well the weather didn’t look any better at all in my eyes, But on the other hand, if wife says its ok, then it must be!
So offs we churns to Strangford. Now I’d put my Princess 35 into any sort of sea and with maybe a bit of reduction on the throttles or even wide open if sea is behind, but I think that with the earlier 33.
Princess were still juggling the figures and hadn’t quite got there yet.
Now the book says. Don’t attempt to go into Strangford unless tide coming in. Cos first it goes out at seven Knots and then it sort of piles up in a big heap at the river entrance. Anyway we must have arrived five minutes too soon cos it was all ten foot lumps every where.
Anyway we makes it to the entrance to the lock and the weather improved and then the lovely people in Strangford finds us a buoy to park up to. Then its off to the Lobster Pot for Lobster thermidore. Which was fantastic. Then the pub across the road, just to round the day off.
So its back to the boat in the trusty dinghy and slightly pissed about midnight, and off to sleep.
I was woken up about an hour latter by the engine ignition buzzers, which for some reason had decided to go off.
Anyway in my drunken, tired state, I thought I’d just shut the buggers up by turning off the master switch and deal with the problem in the morning.
All I had on was a tee shirt and nothing else, but what the hell!
Now the switches are located by the engines out the back door and its pitch black.
So I lifts the engine cover and feels down. I’ve only got to about half way down the engines when my hand goes all wet!
It was about this time when I wakes up and becomes cold sober. And a bit deathly white as well!
So I’ yelling at th-wife to get up and shouting down the radio at the same time.
No answer from radio but th-wifes come to a bit. Chucks wife in dinghy and tells her to go and find help.
Then has a brain wave. Switch bilge pump on. Ah but that’s no good cos some pilock has put it on back to front and its blowing instead of sucking.
End of part one.
So next morning Dermot arrives and then along comes his side kick Chris.
Now Chris had an old or very old MG. You could hear it coming from the other side of the lock, he was meaning to buy a silencer for it and some new tyres, but not a tax disc cos there English things
And Northern Islanders don’t believe in paying England Government nowt.
problem with sinking is soon discovered as a hole in the back end where the prop shaft goes through transom and into outdrive. It’s worn through the bearing and also bell housing. But the tides coming back in fast now, so next brain wave is one of those cans of foam builders use these days.
Ah but the shops at other side of lock. It’s then discovered that Dermots Business is running the Strangford ferries For the MOT. So its on to radio to captain of ferry, to pick up a can of foam and nip back sharpish.
Foam aimed at hole minutes before tide comes in and crane ordered for lift onto Quay.
So the boats afloat again and crane arrives. It’s the oldest thing you’ve ever seen, bloke hands down some worn out three ton straps and boat gets lifted onto quay.
Nice guy lends a geny. So its set up home on the harbour wall, which sort of doubles as village green and prom.
Loads of people ask if we want showers or to stay at there house.
So engines out in no time, new bell housing and other expensive bits thrown in and in a couple of days its another crane and back in the water, Mainly achieved by wife standing at bus stop and waiting for bus to deliver parts. Cos that’s how they do it.
So it’s off now for water born road test. So verruming out of harbour all very impressed and Dermot brought all the family for the ride.
Only got 100 or 200 yds. When the noises changed and the other drive stopped.
So its back to the Quay and another crane.
By now me Dermot and Chris, have got quite skilled at this craning and engine in and out lark.
The general plan is. Chris does all the donkey work whilst me and Dermot officiate and make wise sounding noises.
Strange really cos Chris spoke with a very upper class English accent.
By this time, I’ve taken up residence in Dermots office ordering cranes and engine bits.
Dermots garage is full of treasure for propping boats up and winches and pumps and scaffolding poles.
All the village now best friends and become local celebrities in the pub.
So engine and drive are out and then in again with again much more parts and money.
And another crane. Then the test.
Well I think we got a bit further this time but not very much. There’s an engine overheating but only when planning!
Also all the sea water down the hold and engine room is now starting to show effects.
Even though we’d done everything to clean and power wash the lot.
But the starters packed in, the alternators, and I cant remember what else.
But there was a nice little repair man down the road, so he’s mending as fast as there breaking.
Well every thing to do with water is pulled to bits and four days later still no joy. We’ve even had boat on the beach twice, to see if trouble was in or around the drive leg.
Anyway it ‘s got desperate now so again Chris is summoned and told he must go diving under the boat in the freezing water.
No problem. And there it is a little rubber pipe with a hole in it!
So new rubber pipe Chris mending under water, freezing cold.
We’ve now Been in Strangford three and a half weeks. I’m happy to take up residence there but wife’s thinking she’s never going to get home. I don’t think the oily mess helped a lot.
Now firm friends with Dermot and wife.
We are telling each others life stories.
Dermot had a Big old motor boat in Belfast, for doing trips and corporate entertaining. Four engines in it!
Also the tale of Sailing off to the Azores in, well his other boat which was a big saily thing fitted with everything. That was cos he’d sort of fell out with the tax man so had to go away for six years!
Guess yuv noticed, the humour’s slipping a bit now, and only use one finger, Long Johns cheating like buggery and using two.
Anyway as you’ve guessed we are all getting a bit pissed of by now so tomorrow were going regardless.
Must say though that Strangford lock is one of the most beautiful and friendly places I’ve ever been. Even the police are friendly and there carrying machine guns!
And believe it or not the grass is greener in Ireland, cant explain it, but its true.
So where were we. Yes Ok we’re going!
So ready for off but one engine wont start. Bugger it it’s still going, so jump lead out and that sorts it.
Ahh. Yer not getting off that easily. I’ve not done yet. Yer goin to suffer!
Down the lock and out to sea. Donk the GPS goes, don’t care we’re still going.
Some where anyway!!
We’ve decided that IOM is the best spot cos not to far and what else can go wrong.
Now have you ever tried to steer a 33 off a compass? With waves throwing the boat about and compass going round and round. Its impossible to know what going in a straight is.
So about half way we stops to ask a fisher man. Don’t know what the hell there doing. But radio’d him, blew horn and buzzed all round him three times. Till he took any notice.
Its over there he said, and so many degs thingies.
So Gets IOM.
Next stops Holly Head. So I figure that if I keep the radar on longish range. Either Wales or IOM will always be in view. Well it was’nt.
So Try’s to raise coast guard for bit of help but no answer.
Anyway Wales eventually comes up on radar but never been to Holly Head before so I’m a bit confused. But now able to speak to coast guard. Hope I’m never in real trouble!
Where are you he says?
I’ve got a light flashing on a rock at so many seconds. No its not he says it should be so many flashes.
Count one to ten backwards he says, and we’ll get a fix on you between us lot and Liverpool lot.
So I counts one to ten then dose it again. Never did come up with a position.
Anyway theres a bloody big ship coming out of somewhere in front. Now that must be Holly Head.
Then there’s a yacht comes on the radio and says.” I’ll help you in”, “what speed are you doing”.
“Eighteen knots, I reply.” “Well would you slow down and wait then.”
“SLOW DOWN!! Bugger off!”
The End..
We kept our last boat. A Princess 33. In Pwllheli in North Wales.
Now Wales is great apart from the Welsh but theres no where to go to except Portmadock which is only about seven miles round the corner. So for any visits for more than a couple of days. Ireland is the next easiest option.
Now every year we plan (Well I do.) an extended world cruise, which lasts about three or four weeks.
This one was planned for a far away place called Scotland, but taking the scenic route via Ireland.
So bright and early, about eleven o’clock one summers morning. Of’s we sets for Wicklow, it’s about 65 miles from Pwlleli and the course takes you through the Bardsey sound. Bardsey is a small Island about a mile off the coast and the sea between has a fearsome reputation. But anyway we sploshes through that and on to Wicklow, a place we’ve been to many times before so nowt more to be said about that! Next stop was either Dun Laoghaire or Howth, cant remember now but that’s Dublin for Colin and other thickies.
The next stop was Carlingford Lock. It was here that the weather turned distinctly lumpy, so we’re
hold up for three day in a not to pleasant spot. Now on the fourth day, her indoors who hates sea unless its been plastered down dead flat. Announces that its time to go. Well the weather didn’t look any better at all in my eyes, But on the other hand, if wife says its ok, then it must be!
So offs we churns to Strangford. Now I’d put my Princess 35 into any sort of sea and with maybe a bit of reduction on the throttles or even wide open if sea is behind, but I think that with the earlier 33.
Princess were still juggling the figures and hadn’t quite got there yet.
Now the book says. Don’t attempt to go into Strangford unless tide coming in. Cos first it goes out at seven Knots and then it sort of piles up in a big heap at the river entrance. Anyway we must have arrived five minutes too soon cos it was all ten foot lumps every where.
Anyway we makes it to the entrance to the lock and the weather improved and then the lovely people in Strangford finds us a buoy to park up to. Then its off to the Lobster Pot for Lobster thermidore. Which was fantastic. Then the pub across the road, just to round the day off.
So its back to the boat in the trusty dinghy and slightly pissed about midnight, and off to sleep.
I was woken up about an hour latter by the engine ignition buzzers, which for some reason had decided to go off.
Anyway in my drunken, tired state, I thought I’d just shut the buggers up by turning off the master switch and deal with the problem in the morning.
All I had on was a tee shirt and nothing else, but what the hell!
Now the switches are located by the engines out the back door and its pitch black.
So I lifts the engine cover and feels down. I’ve only got to about half way down the engines when my hand goes all wet!
It was about this time when I wakes up and becomes cold sober. And a bit deathly white as well!
So I’ yelling at th-wife to get up and shouting down the radio at the same time.
No answer from radio but th-wifes come to a bit. Chucks wife in dinghy and tells her to go and find help.
Then has a brain wave. Switch bilge pump on. Ah but that’s no good cos some pilock has put it on back to front and its blowing instead of sucking.
End of part one.
So next morning Dermot arrives and then along comes his side kick Chris.
Now Chris had an old or very old MG. You could hear it coming from the other side of the lock, he was meaning to buy a silencer for it and some new tyres, but not a tax disc cos there English things
And Northern Islanders don’t believe in paying England Government nowt.
problem with sinking is soon discovered as a hole in the back end where the prop shaft goes through transom and into outdrive. It’s worn through the bearing and also bell housing. But the tides coming back in fast now, so next brain wave is one of those cans of foam builders use these days.
Ah but the shops at other side of lock. It’s then discovered that Dermots Business is running the Strangford ferries For the MOT. So its on to radio to captain of ferry, to pick up a can of foam and nip back sharpish.
Foam aimed at hole minutes before tide comes in and crane ordered for lift onto Quay.
So the boats afloat again and crane arrives. It’s the oldest thing you’ve ever seen, bloke hands down some worn out three ton straps and boat gets lifted onto quay.
Nice guy lends a geny. So its set up home on the harbour wall, which sort of doubles as village green and prom.
Loads of people ask if we want showers or to stay at there house.
So engines out in no time, new bell housing and other expensive bits thrown in and in a couple of days its another crane and back in the water, Mainly achieved by wife standing at bus stop and waiting for bus to deliver parts. Cos that’s how they do it.
So it’s off now for water born road test. So verruming out of harbour all very impressed and Dermot brought all the family for the ride.
Only got 100 or 200 yds. When the noises changed and the other drive stopped.
So its back to the Quay and another crane.
By now me Dermot and Chris, have got quite skilled at this craning and engine in and out lark.
The general plan is. Chris does all the donkey work whilst me and Dermot officiate and make wise sounding noises.
Strange really cos Chris spoke with a very upper class English accent.
By this time, I’ve taken up residence in Dermots office ordering cranes and engine bits.
Dermots garage is full of treasure for propping boats up and winches and pumps and scaffolding poles.
All the village now best friends and become local celebrities in the pub.
So engine and drive are out and then in again with again much more parts and money.
And another crane. Then the test.
Well I think we got a bit further this time but not very much. There’s an engine overheating but only when planning!
Also all the sea water down the hold and engine room is now starting to show effects.
Even though we’d done everything to clean and power wash the lot.
But the starters packed in, the alternators, and I cant remember what else.
But there was a nice little repair man down the road, so he’s mending as fast as there breaking.
Well every thing to do with water is pulled to bits and four days later still no joy. We’ve even had boat on the beach twice, to see if trouble was in or around the drive leg.
Anyway it ‘s got desperate now so again Chris is summoned and told he must go diving under the boat in the freezing water.
No problem. And there it is a little rubber pipe with a hole in it!
So new rubber pipe Chris mending under water, freezing cold.
We’ve now Been in Strangford three and a half weeks. I’m happy to take up residence there but wife’s thinking she’s never going to get home. I don’t think the oily mess helped a lot.
Now firm friends with Dermot and wife.
We are telling each others life stories.
Dermot had a Big old motor boat in Belfast, for doing trips and corporate entertaining. Four engines in it!
Also the tale of Sailing off to the Azores in, well his other boat which was a big saily thing fitted with everything. That was cos he’d sort of fell out with the tax man so had to go away for six years!
Guess yuv noticed, the humour’s slipping a bit now, and only use one finger, Long Johns cheating like buggery and using two.
Anyway as you’ve guessed we are all getting a bit pissed of by now so tomorrow were going regardless.
Must say though that Strangford lock is one of the most beautiful and friendly places I’ve ever been. Even the police are friendly and there carrying machine guns!
And believe it or not the grass is greener in Ireland, cant explain it, but its true.
So where were we. Yes Ok we’re going!
So ready for off but one engine wont start. Bugger it it’s still going, so jump lead out and that sorts it.
Ahh. Yer not getting off that easily. I’ve not done yet. Yer goin to suffer!
Down the lock and out to sea. Donk the GPS goes, don’t care we’re still going.
Some where anyway!!
We’ve decided that IOM is the best spot cos not to far and what else can go wrong.
Now have you ever tried to steer a 33 off a compass? With waves throwing the boat about and compass going round and round. Its impossible to know what going in a straight is.
So about half way we stops to ask a fisher man. Don’t know what the hell there doing. But radio’d him, blew horn and buzzed all round him three times. Till he took any notice.
Its over there he said, and so many degs thingies.
So Gets IOM.
Next stops Holly Head. So I figure that if I keep the radar on longish range. Either Wales or IOM will always be in view. Well it was’nt.
So Try’s to raise coast guard for bit of help but no answer.
Anyway Wales eventually comes up on radar but never been to Holly Head before so I’m a bit confused. But now able to speak to coast guard. Hope I’m never in real trouble!
Where are you he says?
I’ve got a light flashing on a rock at so many seconds. No its not he says it should be so many flashes.
Count one to ten backwards he says, and we’ll get a fix on you between us lot and Liverpool lot.
So I counts one to ten then dose it again. Never did come up with a position.
Anyway theres a bloody big ship coming out of somewhere in front. Now that must be Holly Head.
Then there’s a yacht comes on the radio and says.” I’ll help you in”, “what speed are you doing”.
“Eighteen knots, I reply.” “Well would you slow down and wait then.”
“SLOW DOWN!! Bugger off!”
The End..
capnsensible
Well-Known Member
Is that just one then?
hlb
RIP
Well you could try this one.
This is from a few years ago.
Matts yarn about his trip with Collin led me to remember a voyage I made about three years ago. It was late in the year and me and th-wife had set off from Plymouth for a three day cruise.We decided to go west cos the wind was from the east and it would'nt be as bumpy. To cut a long story short and try to get to the point of the story. The wind stay'd in the east we kept going west and when we ran out of land ( at Lands End ) did a right to keep on the lea shore and finished up in Stourport. (just short of Birmingham). We decided this would be a good place to leave the boat for the winter, and it now being only about 130 miles from home in Lancashire we could use it all winter. Especialy cos there was a lovely friendly club house at the marina. About this point(and some mounths later) in the proceadings. Th-wife decides to go all menopausal on me, so I spent most of the winter on the boat to keep out of the way of the dragon. I got to know many of the river and banana (narrow boat) boaties quite well. One day early spring I was asked if I would help bring a boat back from the Isle of White for the son of one of the banana boaters.
He. Hear in they all thought i'd made it up but honest gospel trueth
The crew was selected on the basis of, who could skip work for a few day's, with banana boat man as captain cos it was his sons boat and anyway I think he'd once been on a ferry. WE plotted course on my boats sat-nav in Stourport. Tied my dinghy on the roof of an ancient merc. (Cos it made a good roof rack) and at four in the morning, five of us squeezed into it for the trip to the Isle of White. It broke down countless times but finaly we ends up a few miles up rive from Cowes. THE BOAT. 56ft, 54 tons ex admiralty liberty boat,previously owned and lived on by a drug adict. Theres an Aga Cooker chuffing away with no chimney cos drug adict has flogged it, the galley was made out of orange boxes whilst drug adict was having a bad trip! the toilet in the corner of the er---saloon was behind a curtain, held up with a washing line. The wheel house is about three feet square and consists of a wheel, gear leaver and a compass, with one screw holding it down. (so you can turn it any way round you fancy). At this time the captain takes command and slowly takes on the roll of captain Blye. Fuel is discussed and we're going to pick some up down river, before setting off for Salcolme some 80-90- miles away (this is the first time this boat has moved since the navy had it). Captain sets off a bit slowly Cos the back end's still tied up and the pontoon's comming with us. It was at this point that I started to have slight doubts about this trip!! Off we go down river, the fuel station disapearing a stern. Out into the Solent and the big stew pot on the Aga takes a tumble cos nobody on the boat has been on anything rougher than the Leeds to Liverpool canal. I've been demoted to cabin boy cos I made noises about compasses and fuel and lights and things for a fifteen hour night crossing to Salcolmbe. Anyway happily chugging down the Solent at about eight knots it's noticed that the prop shaft is wearing the stern away and water is comming in, so speed is reduced to six knots, which some what improves the situation. Captain decides to head for Poole and I get instant promotion to pilot cos I've been before and anyway I've got the charts. In poole I head for the fuel barge. Cant remember what the tank held, but we put in about twenty gallons more than full!!. So god knows how we'de have got to Salcolmbe!!! Captain takes the helm Again and trys to remove the rails on an eight ton bouy. Fifty six tons meeting eight tons is quite something!! Off to the chip shop in pool for supper. Captain decides we'll set off for poole around mid night. I point out that I've never been out of Poole at night and with all the lights from cars and street lights it's hard to find the way and in any case this boat wont stop in less than two hundred yards. So lets go now whilst we can still see. Needless to say I'm back in cabin boy mode. Off captain goes totaly ignoring the fair way and heads through the middle of the moorings. Somebody rushes to the bow and franticly waves left and right as the moored craft loom into sight from the pitch black night.We did a circular tour of Poole harbour about three times before comming across the Cherbourg ferry, so captain decides to follow it out of the harbour We've got two micky mouse hand held GPS's neither of which we could get a position out of. Captain did'nt believe in all that rubbish anyway and said " You can go anywhere off a compass" The fact that this one spent most of the time rolling about on the floor and the crew put it back on it's stand in various positions, had little significance.
We plotted a course and captain went to bed. Son's wife is histerical cos she's only been on a canal boat before and it's pitch black, miles out at sea and rolling about a bit. Anyway with captain fast asleep I try to get a bit of order and make this tub a bit more sea worthy. The piece of string holding the steel cable to the rudder got fixed And I tried many times to get the captains son who was the mechanic (and had the tools) to mend the compass. But he had no interest in the compass.
Some time in the middle of the night we got one of the GPS's working and changed course a couple of times till I could see the headland Off Salcolmbe in the early morning gloom. Captain wakes up and announces "there you are. You can go anywhere off a compass". By this time I've been up most of the night. the choice for sleeping was in the fore cabin with the sons wife and the Aga Cooker filling the place with smoke and not much heat or the aft cabin filled with rubbish and spare parts and freezing cold. The captain slept in the engine room which was the cleanest and warmest place on the boat. I started grumbling about breakfast and a cup of tea would be nice, About an hour later it arrived, Raw sausage butties and luke warm tea. Salcolme. Hunt round for a stove to replace the Aga. One of the crew comes back with a second hand primos. then off to the yatch club for shower and food.
Three am. and captain's ready for off. Points UP river and declares " there's the lights it's easy" I go opposite way over the bar and out to sea. Captain takes over cos I'm grumbling Again cos all the smoke from the Aga is blowing into the wheel house and I cant see the channel and cant breath either. We leave him in there for a couple of hours to stew. Meanwill the crews got the primos in the saloon. and are trying to light it with the petrol for my out board. Flames five foot high and rolling about the floor.
We're heading for Falmouth, 260deg (If my memmory serves me) With the Edistone lighthouse half way across. Son and wife have had enough of miles out at sea so captain takes the scenic route around the coast. this is ok but at five-six knot's it doubles the journey time. In the mean time back at the ranch. The sea's built up to a good force six/seven and the coast is disapearing in the rain. The captain is telling the crew to steer 260deg. This might have been ok from Salcolmbe but we're now somewhere off loe!! No way can I tell him he's wrong and the crew dont know any better. We're now heading for the rocks between Fowey and Falmouth with a big following sea. When they came into view. Captain and his now first mate ( Cos he dosent know any better so dos'nt argue) decides that you've got to ease the boat round slowly, (cos they saw it in a film somwhere) and anyway they dont like the look of the big folowing sea. An hour later. the boats still heading for the rocks and the captains still going to ease it round. Things are now getting a bit serious. Captain's wedged in the three foot square wheel house. The rest of the crew are petrifide in the saloon which dos'nt have a door but a ladder and hatch like a submarine.I've had enough, so telling the crew "it's going to bounce a bit I'm through the hatch dodge the waves coming over the deck and get into the wheel house with the captain. the compass is on the floor but there is'nt room to bend down and pick it up. I can see the day marker which is a big red and white tower off Fowey so I know where I'm heading for. Captain's face is now ash white but at least some of the arrAgance has gone. After screaming a bit I get him to put the wheel hard over and give the engine some stick. The boat comes round fine apart from upsetting the crew down in the hold and the chiefe mechanic complaining about the prop shaft. About hundred yards off Fowey the hand held VHF comes into range and Fowey radio asks if we are having trouble getting into harbour. "No" says the captain "we've just been fishing", "Well will you let us know when you're leaving" came the reply. I booked my self into the King of Persia for the night. and caught the train the next morning. The boat did eventualy arrive at Stourport after some arguments with another bouy, a rock, and some mud. And I think Lands End is a bit shorter than it used to be.
This story is purely ficticious and the cast bare no resemblence to any person living or dead and If you've noticed I cant spell!!
This is from a few years ago.
Matts yarn about his trip with Collin led me to remember a voyage I made about three years ago. It was late in the year and me and th-wife had set off from Plymouth for a three day cruise.We decided to go west cos the wind was from the east and it would'nt be as bumpy. To cut a long story short and try to get to the point of the story. The wind stay'd in the east we kept going west and when we ran out of land ( at Lands End ) did a right to keep on the lea shore and finished up in Stourport. (just short of Birmingham). We decided this would be a good place to leave the boat for the winter, and it now being only about 130 miles from home in Lancashire we could use it all winter. Especialy cos there was a lovely friendly club house at the marina. About this point(and some mounths later) in the proceadings. Th-wife decides to go all menopausal on me, so I spent most of the winter on the boat to keep out of the way of the dragon. I got to know many of the river and banana (narrow boat) boaties quite well. One day early spring I was asked if I would help bring a boat back from the Isle of White for the son of one of the banana boaters.
He. Hear in they all thought i'd made it up but honest gospel trueth
The crew was selected on the basis of, who could skip work for a few day's, with banana boat man as captain cos it was his sons boat and anyway I think he'd once been on a ferry. WE plotted course on my boats sat-nav in Stourport. Tied my dinghy on the roof of an ancient merc. (Cos it made a good roof rack) and at four in the morning, five of us squeezed into it for the trip to the Isle of White. It broke down countless times but finaly we ends up a few miles up rive from Cowes. THE BOAT. 56ft, 54 tons ex admiralty liberty boat,previously owned and lived on by a drug adict. Theres an Aga Cooker chuffing away with no chimney cos drug adict has flogged it, the galley was made out of orange boxes whilst drug adict was having a bad trip! the toilet in the corner of the er---saloon was behind a curtain, held up with a washing line. The wheel house is about three feet square and consists of a wheel, gear leaver and a compass, with one screw holding it down. (so you can turn it any way round you fancy). At this time the captain takes command and slowly takes on the roll of captain Blye. Fuel is discussed and we're going to pick some up down river, before setting off for Salcolme some 80-90- miles away (this is the first time this boat has moved since the navy had it). Captain sets off a bit slowly Cos the back end's still tied up and the pontoon's comming with us. It was at this point that I started to have slight doubts about this trip!! Off we go down river, the fuel station disapearing a stern. Out into the Solent and the big stew pot on the Aga takes a tumble cos nobody on the boat has been on anything rougher than the Leeds to Liverpool canal. I've been demoted to cabin boy cos I made noises about compasses and fuel and lights and things for a fifteen hour night crossing to Salcolmbe. Anyway happily chugging down the Solent at about eight knots it's noticed that the prop shaft is wearing the stern away and water is comming in, so speed is reduced to six knots, which some what improves the situation. Captain decides to head for Poole and I get instant promotion to pilot cos I've been before and anyway I've got the charts. In poole I head for the fuel barge. Cant remember what the tank held, but we put in about twenty gallons more than full!!. So god knows how we'de have got to Salcolmbe!!! Captain takes the helm Again and trys to remove the rails on an eight ton bouy. Fifty six tons meeting eight tons is quite something!! Off to the chip shop in pool for supper. Captain decides we'll set off for poole around mid night. I point out that I've never been out of Poole at night and with all the lights from cars and street lights it's hard to find the way and in any case this boat wont stop in less than two hundred yards. So lets go now whilst we can still see. Needless to say I'm back in cabin boy mode. Off captain goes totaly ignoring the fair way and heads through the middle of the moorings. Somebody rushes to the bow and franticly waves left and right as the moored craft loom into sight from the pitch black night.We did a circular tour of Poole harbour about three times before comming across the Cherbourg ferry, so captain decides to follow it out of the harbour We've got two micky mouse hand held GPS's neither of which we could get a position out of. Captain did'nt believe in all that rubbish anyway and said " You can go anywhere off a compass" The fact that this one spent most of the time rolling about on the floor and the crew put it back on it's stand in various positions, had little significance.
We plotted a course and captain went to bed. Son's wife is histerical cos she's only been on a canal boat before and it's pitch black, miles out at sea and rolling about a bit. Anyway with captain fast asleep I try to get a bit of order and make this tub a bit more sea worthy. The piece of string holding the steel cable to the rudder got fixed And I tried many times to get the captains son who was the mechanic (and had the tools) to mend the compass. But he had no interest in the compass.
Some time in the middle of the night we got one of the GPS's working and changed course a couple of times till I could see the headland Off Salcolmbe in the early morning gloom. Captain wakes up and announces "there you are. You can go anywhere off a compass". By this time I've been up most of the night. the choice for sleeping was in the fore cabin with the sons wife and the Aga Cooker filling the place with smoke and not much heat or the aft cabin filled with rubbish and spare parts and freezing cold. The captain slept in the engine room which was the cleanest and warmest place on the boat. I started grumbling about breakfast and a cup of tea would be nice, About an hour later it arrived, Raw sausage butties and luke warm tea. Salcolme. Hunt round for a stove to replace the Aga. One of the crew comes back with a second hand primos. then off to the yatch club for shower and food.
Three am. and captain's ready for off. Points UP river and declares " there's the lights it's easy" I go opposite way over the bar and out to sea. Captain takes over cos I'm grumbling Again cos all the smoke from the Aga is blowing into the wheel house and I cant see the channel and cant breath either. We leave him in there for a couple of hours to stew. Meanwill the crews got the primos in the saloon. and are trying to light it with the petrol for my out board. Flames five foot high and rolling about the floor.
We're heading for Falmouth, 260deg (If my memmory serves me) With the Edistone lighthouse half way across. Son and wife have had enough of miles out at sea so captain takes the scenic route around the coast. this is ok but at five-six knot's it doubles the journey time. In the mean time back at the ranch. The sea's built up to a good force six/seven and the coast is disapearing in the rain. The captain is telling the crew to steer 260deg. This might have been ok from Salcolmbe but we're now somewhere off loe!! No way can I tell him he's wrong and the crew dont know any better. We're now heading for the rocks between Fowey and Falmouth with a big following sea. When they came into view. Captain and his now first mate ( Cos he dosent know any better so dos'nt argue) decides that you've got to ease the boat round slowly, (cos they saw it in a film somwhere) and anyway they dont like the look of the big folowing sea. An hour later. the boats still heading for the rocks and the captains still going to ease it round. Things are now getting a bit serious. Captain's wedged in the three foot square wheel house. The rest of the crew are petrifide in the saloon which dos'nt have a door but a ladder and hatch like a submarine.I've had enough, so telling the crew "it's going to bounce a bit I'm through the hatch dodge the waves coming over the deck and get into the wheel house with the captain. the compass is on the floor but there is'nt room to bend down and pick it up. I can see the day marker which is a big red and white tower off Fowey so I know where I'm heading for. Captain's face is now ash white but at least some of the arrAgance has gone. After screaming a bit I get him to put the wheel hard over and give the engine some stick. The boat comes round fine apart from upsetting the crew down in the hold and the chiefe mechanic complaining about the prop shaft. About hundred yards off Fowey the hand held VHF comes into range and Fowey radio asks if we are having trouble getting into harbour. "No" says the captain "we've just been fishing", "Well will you let us know when you're leaving" came the reply. I booked my self into the King of Persia for the night. and caught the train the next morning. The boat did eventualy arrive at Stourport after some arguments with another bouy, a rock, and some mud. And I think Lands End is a bit shorter than it used to be.
This story is purely ficticious and the cast bare no resemblence to any person living or dead and If you've noticed I cant spell!!
studgies
Well-Known Member
Have you broken another boat Julie?? (Jim made me say that). /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
powerskipper
Well-Known Member
Not recently, /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
and I do not break them , they just decide that they want some sympathy from a female and do something to get some attention /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
Like:
only going into ahead on starboard ever other time you engage it,
over heat if pushed over 2,000 revs,
decide that thats the day they are going to show you they have diesel bug, by loosing power on a trip until you can't do more than 10 knots , and always when you have a long trip to do,
the boat decides that one engine is thirster than the other by 30%, on a trip that is on the limits of its range and you have to pop in for more fuel on route,
Nav light decide to stop working on one side and you have to do night ex,
Anchor winch packs up, while you are at anchor, very heavy to pull in 35m of chain by hand, /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
So nothing dramatic, just attention getting from the boats.
and I do not break them , they just decide that they want some sympathy from a female and do something to get some attention /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
Like:
only going into ahead on starboard ever other time you engage it,
over heat if pushed over 2,000 revs,
decide that thats the day they are going to show you they have diesel bug, by loosing power on a trip until you can't do more than 10 knots , and always when you have a long trip to do,
the boat decides that one engine is thirster than the other by 30%, on a trip that is on the limits of its range and you have to pop in for more fuel on route,
Nav light decide to stop working on one side and you have to do night ex,
Anchor winch packs up, while you are at anchor, very heavy to pull in 35m of chain by hand, /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
So nothing dramatic, just attention getting from the boats.
powerskipper
Well-Known Member
1st post , brilliant,
2nd good but I would have bailed earlier /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
2nd good but I would have bailed earlier /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
oceandrive
Well-Known Member
Wow Power skipper you've certainly grown since SIBS!! info@oceandrivecharter.com /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
alt
Well-Known Member
I'd need an English degree to read this thread me thinks - feck that ted