Harry Keeps Asking

[hlb]

Sorry for this but Harry has trouble with his hooves on the key board, sort of......ihoiho; fsffrsgge!!.

Anyway he wants to know if theres a panto this year?
Is he co staring with Pauline again as Pussy In Boats??

Or is Julie staring in the Fairy story.

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Willl any old washing up liquid do!! /forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif /forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[Alistairr]

Somebody mention my name????

 

[powerskipper]

LOL.
Mite be a clean one then!!!

Well come on lets start one .
what will it be.
sleeping beauty, with Pauline in the lead roll, but set on water rather than land.

 

[mirabriani]

Julie set out in her dinghy to visit granny.
Granny lived across the creek
She had been a little sick
Julie was taking her a little basket
of goodies
Mummy warned Julie to beware
of the big bad Power Boat
who preyed on little ones in dinghies............

 

[powerskipper]

So Julie being a sensible girl, set of a rowing with her safety bag that held........

 

[mirabriani]

flares, compass, mace spray and lots of other things that little girls keep in their bag (which will forever be a mystery to men)

 

[powerskipper]

and so it should be, well row row row she went, merrily down the river,
when the big bad motor boat "mucky farter" came over the horizon,
Oh what to do says Julie ....

 

[mirabriani]

"Ello little girl in dinghy"
Says Big Bad Power Boat as he slowly circled round her
"Why do you ask 'what to do' he said menacingly"
.............

 

[hlb]

Harry had borrowed Mucky Farter for his christmas holidays as with the ebespatcher going, it was much warmer than in his field in the frozen North.

Seeing Julie in the dinghy he put on a bit of a spurt and raced over to her, making an enormous wave in the proccess.

 

[jhr]

“Help"! said Julie, "he's coming alongside! What can I do to stop him? I know, let’s all sing a song”!


Now come, all you people and listen to me
I’m a-crossin’ the creek, for my granny to see.
She’s old and she’s weary, a venerable sinner
But she’s gonna be eaten as somebody’s dinner!

I’m trying to get there before hlb
‘Cos he’ll mangle her up for his supper you see
With his props a-revolvin’ he’ll cut her to pieces
He’s a peril to Grannies and great aunts and nieces.

But I’m not afraid of his mucky old boat,
I can keep him at arm’s length as long as I float.
I can run rings around him all day if I must
‘Cos his bows are delayed by a shortage of thrust. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

But if granny ends up as an OAP steak
I’ll scream and I’ll scream ‘til the windows all break
Then I’ll pick up a fragment of razor sharp glass
And skewer the wolf by his great hairy arm.


“That was lovely, wasn't it boys and girls”? said Julie “The only trouble is that I can’t quite get the rhyme for the last line right. Can anybody else suggest anything”?

[To be continued, I fear..........]

 

[paulineb]

pass

 

[hlb]

My. What big.....................Ears you have said Julie. Harry had never heard anyone mention his ears before, they had all been gob smacked by his other accompanyments!! So he was quite upset that Julie had not noticed.

Anyway it was Christmas and Harry being in a good mood, offered Julie a tow to grandmothers house...

 

[boatone]

......but as Julie was about to take a couple of turns round one of Harry's bollards there was an enormous clap of thunder....the heavens opened up and an enormous booming voice said........

 

[Becky]

Oh no Mr Mobo man, I'm not that sort of girl
replied Julie, twiddling her hair to a curl
My Granny is old and weary and in bed
I have goodies in my basket, it has to be said
not really ideal for a lady of such an age
but if she sees you she'll be in a rage.

You must go away now, please leave me alone
or the men from the Forum will hoist a warning cone.
Then the Coastguards will call out the RNLI
who will capture you, they'll call you a spy

They will drag you aboard by your long floppy ears
You'll really suffer, they'll expose all your fears
They will cut off your testiments, they'll put out your eyes,
and all for telling those motor boating lies

To be continued.................................

 

[hlb]

Little Red Riding Hood Meets Dirty Harry

EeHaw, EeHaw. He always says that!! Get yer hands round this Little Red Riding Hood and I'll give you the ride of your life!! Harry easily lifter Julie aboard and took her to warm up in Muckies bedroom..

 

[boatone]

We now have a choice for the audience to decide whether this little tale continues down the sort of girly girly route of' oh no Im not that sort of girl' (ha bloody ha......) or the much more interesting route that I have suggested with Julie trying to take a turn round Harry's bollards......the choice is yours ........ /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[hlb]

Leaving Mucky Farter on her auto pilot and heading in the rough direction of grandma's house. Dirty Harry soon had Julie feeling nice and warm in the bedroom.

 

[powerskipper]

Re: Little Red Riding Hood Meets Dirty Harry

your trying to get me in trouble one way or another says Julie , But thank you for the hot chocolate but I must go and see auntie.
and Julie makes a quick dash to her boat.

 

[hlb]

Re: Little Red Riding Hood Meets Dirty Harry

But Julies little boat had come adrift in the storm and Harry was quite a gentle man. in a donkey sort of way!!

Julie had yet to realise that Harry was quite famous on here for his damsel in distress panto specials. And nothing to be frightened of at all.

 

[powerskipper]

Re: Little Red Riding Hood Meets Dirty Harry

Oh harry , can you take me to aunt Pauline house,
and you do have wonderfull..............ears