Genetically disadvantaged, rant

[fluffc]

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I certainly would not let my son of 13 to be on the water on his own

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You are kidding, aren't you??

 

[tcm]

yep, same here.

Imho children have to be brought to and through the age of reason. It seems over-protective to me if they haven't been allowed some significant independence by the age of 16, and boating is no different. But it depends on the individual child - some are responsible enought to skipper a large boat without dad on board aged well under 16, others just aren't. The parents -or others in charge at the time - have to tell them how their activities might annoy, affect of help others and ensure they are super-responsible, able to spot and correct their own faults, deal with an emergency and lots more. Otherwise much later they'll just be older - but still thoughtless - and there are plenty of those people around.

 

[srp]

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Most people - but not all - IMHO are still decent souls.

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I think you're right. However, it only takes 2 or 3 rubber ducks in an area where 2-300 boats are moored or anchored to create a nuisance.
As to the 'age of responsibility' thing, well that has to be up to individual parents. Nothing wrong with a competent 13 year old being responsible, and nothing wrong with a parent deciding 16 is a better age. Most children will live up to a responsibility placed on their shoulders by sensible parents. Some, however, have parents that are less than sensible.
So, why post here about it? It's nice to know what others think, if its a real or imagined problem, or whether someone else has found a solution. I haven't found one - when I radioed the water taxi/harbour masters rep he said 'Oh yes, they were here last year, and did exactly the same' and that was the extent of his involvement.

 

[dom]

In the case of my son he is on his own a truly a responsible and considerate chap in front of the clubhouse. With two of his mates, and out of my view, he could I am sure behave like a complete t*sser. It is a pity that adults in general are now so nervous in telling other peoples offspring to cool it or they will complain.

That said, my guess is that if this happened to my son he would after being ticked off say something like:

"I bet it was the geyser in the white boat who told you this. We were just going past - 1200 rpm I promise dad - and he ........................................"

Yawn. /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif

"Well junior you and your mates had better get the mop out!"

 

[john_morris_uk]

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"I bet it was the geyser in the white boat who told you this. We were just going past - 1200 rpm I promise dad - and he ........................................"



[/ QUOTE ] Our son in Newton Ferrers, rowing back to the boat after some serious exploration up the river. "The prop just fell off - we didn't hit anything honest!!"

 

[ccscott49]

Not iresponsible, just arguing about the age to let them go!!
Responsible parents breed responsible kids, simple as that!

 

[whipper_snapper]

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Apart from this as his father I am responsible for his well being untill he becomes of age and as such i have this reponsibility to bear

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But we also have a responsibility to expose our kids to the world. I have film of my kids then aged 4,6 & 8 rowing the dinghy ashore in the Med. They were paddling old windsurfers around a lake at the age of 6. They were 'racing' oppies at the same age. There is no doubt that these were the highpoints of their childhood and gave them an awareness of their surroundings and a measure of self reliance that has stood them in good stead.

Of course I worried, but that was just me being selfish.

And back to the original post, part of that is giving them an understanding of the impact of their actions on others. If they live their lives in a cocoon, is it any wonder they behave selfishly and irresponsibly when released.

 

[Lakesailor]

We don't have kids, from choice, so my thoughts may be biased. But you point about kids not having many other outlets for "adventure" is very apposite.
I get a bit miffed on the lake with people speeding inappropriately (especially in the 6mph zone, which has been there for a long time) but must admit my thoughts are directed towards the "responsible adults" rather than the kids. You have to have a childhood and it's up to your parents to mould you. If the parents are gold-bedecked short-neck tattooed tossers who drive their 36ft flybridges through the 6mph area on the plane, then what hope for the kids?

 

[fireball]

Yee gods - I must be getting old ... I'm agreeing with you again! ... Doh! Must be some tablets somewhere I can take.

 

[Phoenix of Hamble]

hear hear....

Mine are allowed out in the tender.... aged 11 and 8, but only with oars.... they go exploring around the marina....

My daughter has been promised access to the outboard at 13.... and she can't wait...

As with many above, its a matter, IMHO, of allowing them freedom, but ensuring that they also are fully aware that with the freedom comes responsibility for their actions...

PS.... great idea about letting them go crawl up a ditch with a chart and sketch book..... will be taking that idea on board!

 

[KevB]

I think the whole problem is down to the honda 2hp 4 stroke. I think it must need to be at full throttle to go anywhere. What a racket it makes for such a little engine. Now if the kids were using a nice 2.2hp two stroke you'd have hardly noticed they were there.

 

[jimi]

I let my 13 yo daughter loose with the dinghy and outboard and her and her friend zoom about in it, never had a problem they get loads of smiles and waves from other water users who are pleased to see two young lasses enjoying themselves on the water .. mind you they came back with 2 inches of smelly silt in the dinghy after an exploration foray ashore once .. serious laundry session was required.

 

[Sailfree]

Last year I took 2 youths 13 & 14 (both related to either me or SWMBO) from inner city areas away for a weeks cruise to France. Considering it safe in Ouistreham I took them out in the inflatable dinghy, all wearing lifejackets and showed them how to row it. I later I put on the small 2.3 Honda and showed them how to use the kill cord and generally taught them to use the dinghy and motor.

While they loved the weeks sailing the high spot of the week for them was when they were trusted to "skipper" their own boat on their own. Someone did tell them to bugger off and I told them to just not go anywhere near him explaining that there are just some miserable old gits around.

Hopefully we will soon start to put a bit more back into society and take out other underprivileged youths out from the charity Fairbridge and hopefully see some of them grow in confidence and stature.

I grew up as a inner city street urchin doing the normal thigs of breaking windows, knicking from shops and generally being a pain in the bum as all my mates were.

One of the youths that was so annoying in the dinghy was my grandson and he enjoys being on the water going to grammer school playing rugby and god fobid he is already talking about doing medicine at university. Why could he not be like me as a kid and spend his time vandalising cars instead of wanting to be responsible for a inflatable and outboard - where did I go wrong??

 

[graham]

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I think the whole problem is down to the honda 2hp 4 stroke.

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be better if they had seagulls /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Seriously though I think it is antisocial letting kids make a racket all day in a quiet spot.

 

[KevB]

We've let our son use the dinghy with engine since he was about 11 but only on the proviso that he is going somewhere, be it up the river or around the harbour. Never around the same place continuously. So if he was annoying anyone it'll only be for a few seconds every half hour or so.

 

[Birdseye]

There's lots of parents here missing the issue totally. Its not about letting kids have some freedom to grow up. Its not about kids playing in the dinghies with an outboard. Its about outboard powered dinghies zooming through moorings and round pontoons - and it would be no better if it were the dads in the dinghies not the kids.

Dinghies are for getting from A to B in moorings and marinas. If you want to play, or want your kid to play, send them off into the next bay or outside the marina entrance. They will enjoy it more anyway. If you're not willing top let little Justin do that, then wrap the little sod up in cotton wool and keep him on board spoiling your fun rather than someone elses.

But todays young kids are if anything better behaved than we used to be. If I think back to the things I got up to (from shooting another kid in the arse with a pellet gun to boiling up glycerene in conc sulphuric and nitric acid mix in an attempt, thankfully unsuccessful, to make nitroglycerine ) I thank God that I got away with it in one piece and that my kids were far more responsible than I was. Todays problem isnt the kids - its a pernicious mixture of parents who would rather have two incomes and a flash boat than devote time at home to bringing up the kids proper like, combined with an aggressive "f ... you" attitude that rules out consideration of anyone but self.

 

[john_morris_uk]

I have got some sympathies with your point of view. Children need parents who take an active interest in what they do. Children need to learn that with freedom comes responsibilites.

I saw a seven year old being told to "just 'eff' off" when someone was on the phone the other day. What values is that kid being brought up with?

The next day I say a child being lead by his ear out of a shop (screaming with pain) because he wouldn't stand still. If the father was doing that in public, what does he do in private?

I am all for boundaries and discipline, but children also need examples of how to behave from their carers. Some people seem to find it too much bother to show their children what is right and wrong. Out of sight, out of mind. Anything for an easy life.

I met a Mum once who said she couldn't wait for her child to be old enought to be propped up in front of the telly to keep him amused.

Nuff said.

 

[Captain Haddock]

Hmmm do you think the kids buzz about with the outboards because they are essentially copying Mum and Dad who also buzz about in their bigger boat with somewhat larger engines?

Is this a fundamental difference between the Raggies and Stinkies and what the kids/parents of the two camps perceive as being normal? Raggies Oars only no engine appreciate the tranquility, Stinkies forget the stick things that come with the dinghy the engines there - feel the power.

BTW As raggie parents of two kids 9 & 13 we also adopt the approach of oars if you must potter in the marina, outboard if you are going somewhere meaningful/get out of trouble.

I've also noticed how errands with an outboard perk up lethargic teenagers