friday joke NB

[janeK]

Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.
(and the best is definitely last!)

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME


ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE


ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:



PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA:
When you rearrange the letters (With no letters left over and using each letter only once): TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay too much time on their hands!

 

[Rowana]

Aye laddie

A Scottish soldier in full dress marches into a pharmacy to speak to the druggist. The Scot opens his sporran and pulls out a neatly folded cotton bandana, opens it to reveal a smaller silk square which he unfolds to reveal a condom. The condom has a number of patches on it. He holds it up.

"How much to repair it?" the Scot asks the pharmacist.

"Six pence," says the pharmacist.

"How much for a new one?"

"Ten pence."


The Scot folds the condom into the silk square and the cotton bandana, places it in his sporran and marches down the aisle and out the door of the pharmacy. A moment or two later a great shout goes up, followed by an even greater shout. The Scot walks into the pharmacy again, and back to the pharmacist.

"The regiment has taken a vote," the Scot says. "We'll have a new one."

 

[FullCircle]

Re: Aye laddie

And I thought they were still using knotted sheeps intestines! /forums/images/graemlins/cool.gif

 

[billcowan]

Re: Aye laddie

No, if you take care the sheeps intestines dont get knotted too badly.

 

[Porthandbuoy]

Re: Aye laddie

Which reminds me. A Welsh colleague tells me they don't use oversize wellies any more. They just point the sheep at a cliff and the sheep just sort of backs up and doesn't even try to get away.