Family Sailing

[Athene V30]

This is my youngest helming on the way back from Bradwell to Brightlingsea after our family weekend this 'summer'.

He tell's me he didn't enjoy it. I actually think it is his mother who doesn't enjoy it and he is following her lead!

Is the face of a child not wanting to be there?

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Whereas here are two who were fed up and wanted to be elsewhere

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Oops, just noticed only lifejacket was on SWMBO sitting in the cabin!

 

[Auntie Helen]

I think the dog looks like it was enjoying it the most.

 

[MoodySabre]

Get your youngest to bring a friend and then he can show off how he can helm. That should make sailing more cool (and leave his Mum at home).

 

[johnalison]

Who said anyone is supposed to enjoy sailing, especially children? We used to drag ours out in all weathers and wherever we were going, year after year and never thought to ask them if they were enjoying themselves. The funny thing is that they both still insist on coming as often as they can thirty years later.

 

[saltyrob]

Hi,

Have two sons, now 17 and 20,who both around 15 years decided that sailing has boring, uncool, lacked cred, etc,etc.The eldest has never really been very interested, until his girlfriend joined us on a day sail in the Deben.She commented that she was really enjoying the sail and son became instant old mariner and source of all marine knowledge.Have often sailed on very short trips with sons friends and that has been succesful,especially in Holland

Rob

 

[Colvic Watson]

Maybe it's in the blood. Eldest daughter was bored by it all from the word go. Middle daughter loved it from the word go and has been France/Belgium/Holland and East Coast cruises. The eldest will tolerate it for a day sail if a pizza is promised for afterwards. Done all the right things, she tried helming, navigation and stuff. No seasickness but never took to it. The only difference I could spot (apart from attitude) is that the middle daughter is always pointimng stuff out on the land/navigation marks etc, eldest doesn't.

 

[Gin]

You've cheered me up no end!.

I thought I was alone with a 17 year old son who sits below reading on passage, doesn't want to helm and not interested in navigation.

But then again much has to do with an older sister who is overflowing with enthusiasm and the poor lad can't get a look in- when he tries she snaps his head off for being inept.

Now daughter is at uni. I'm hoping that we two lads may be able to make some progress together and make him a fully contributing member of the crew, otherwise it is analagous to my father dragging me off in the car in 50's each weekend to the coast for no better reason that he enjoyed the driving- pure hell until I managed to escape when I went out to work at 17.

 

[chiefeng]

Got my three (10 & 2X6 year olds) out this year for the first time. Picked the calm days and days with a gentle breeze to break them in slowly. They enjoyed all aspects, didn't even mind when we started to heel over a bit, but got freaked out when the sails got all flappy "and made a noise", guess I've still got a bit of work to do.

P.S. someone has to keep mum occupied!

 

[Sailing Widow]

Pyro's trying his long-standing family tactic of simply insisting that everyone goes to the boat every weekend so that the kiddies just grow up accepting that's the way weekends work! The 2 year old is Chief Flag Raiser and the 3 year old comes down under duress so long as a trip to the Castle, dinner at the Light Ship and lollipops afterwards are offered. Lord help us when they reach puberty!

 

[Babbers]

That's how we did it.

Every WE - one day their ass belonged to me.
We picked the best day, but we went sailing - every week.

Alas, it only worked on the kids, not the wife.
So when the offspring left home I had to sell the boat.
Now that I'm due to retire I've been authorised to buy another one - she's even promised to come along for a year or so (maybe longer). Fingers crossed.

 

[Athene V30]

Unfortunately I didn't get my first boat until the kids were 9, 7 & 5 so didn't get them young enough as by then they were already into football etc! Since then we have added a fourth and there is no way SWMBO would agree to anymore then 1 visit a year to the boat.

They tell me the first 18 years are the worse. After that the problems do not go away, they just get more expensive.

 

[Phoenix of Hamble]

Thats what we did.... and they are now both salty sea puppies aged 10 and 13....!

As for the 'uncool' bit..... mine think its really cool, and love to talk about it to all and sundry, usually 'enlarging' the experiences, and presenting it all as a grand adventure!

Like many (not just kids), they sometimes find the longer passages a bit boring, but love it when we do stuff like family singalongs... both are learning to navigate slowly, and enjoying it thoroughly....

I guess, its about starting 'em young, and making it compulsory rather than optional, but also engaging rather than enforced...

 

[CPD]

The most memorable sail I had with my two was coming out of Bembridge with Oliver who was then 10 on the tiller and Ben (8) on pirate watch at the same time. Great stuff. They too however get bored in the longer passages but that is fairly easily dealt with with the usual I spy (rather a short game if offshore) or the psp/ds thingies.

 

[michael_w]

Get your nipper a boat his size! Whizzy planing dinghies beat clonky cruisers out of sight. Please nothing boring and staid. I hankered after a Moth, but settled for a 420.

 

[pyrojames]

I suspect that setting my 2 yo son and 3 yo daughter for races in their own dinghies may be frowned upon by SWMBO. At least, it would be most of the time....

 

[eastcoastbernie]

My son was introduced to dinghies pretty early on ... the occasional outing with a competent helm at first, then on a cadet course sailing toppers when deemed old enough. He seemed to enjoy it well enough but was never madly enthusiastic. He was much keener on football.

The dinghies were sold and I spent my weekends watching him playing football and other sports, but not sailing. Many years later I was invited to sail on other people's yachts and my son came along for the odd trip. He was much more interested in playing on his gameboy than participating in helming, navigation or even looking at the scenery going by.

When I talked about getting a yacht he said he 'might crew for me maybe once month'. Then I got the yacht and it was at least two years before he actually saw her. Amusingly he 'recognised' her, because of all the parts of her that had been removed and brought home for repair, varnishing, storage, etc over the previous couple of years.

Then, out of the blue, he suddenly said he would come sailing with me for the weekend. (He's at Portsmouth uni and I suspected maybe a sailing-oriented female might have needed to be impressed.)

So I decided to plan for the shortest possible passage to allow for maximum time in the pub and minimum time at sea. SYH to Pin Mill was ideal /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

The weekend involved a couple of large fry ups, a bit of energetic tacking, the loss of a boat hook, cake, dinghy ride to the pub, mum falling in the water, a walk around Pin Mill, huge meal in the Butt & Oyster, wading back to the boat in knee-high mud, swampman and swampwoman cleaning off in the cockpit with buckets of sea-water.... /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif


By Sunday morning son was beginning to get the hang of life on board and announced while he still couldn't really see the attraction of sailing he quite liked the sitting in the sunshine drinking beer bit, and being able to reach the cake while still lying in your bunk bit. I told him that was all part of sailing and there was no shame in enjoying those bits too.

So we had a great weekend and a load of laughs. But he hasn't been since. Although he sort of enjoyed himself, he just enjoys himself more doing other things!

 

[Athene V30]

[ QUOTE ]
Get your nipper a boat his size! Whizzy planing dinghies beat clonky cruisers out of sight. Please nothing boring and staid. I hankered after a Moth, but settled for a 420.

[/ QUOTE ]
Tried that too. Had a Firefly for a couple of years - maybe that is now boring and staid even though it was an Olympic class once! Youngest didn't like it tipping and he felt too close to the water. He fancies a fast RIB ride though!

 

[johnalison]

I fell genuinely sorry for all of you who have difficulty hetting their family to share their passion. In spite of my superficially frivolous answer above, I really don't know what the secret is; all I know is that we must have done something right because through all their young years which were not free of problems, our two retained their pleasure in coming on our then quite small boat.

I'm inclined to think that our attitude that sailing was nothing special - it was just what we always did, that helped form their tolerance. Whole books have been written about the subject, and while it is all good advice, they seldom mention that living in the close confinement and discipline of a boat concentrates a family's shared experiences in a way that accentuates factors which both binds and stresses it's members. Our children learned to take us as they found us, and as we are both very obstinate and they are very tolerant it worked quite well.

It certainly helps if youngsters don't get sea-sickness. We were incredibly lucky as ours have cast iron stomachs. My only bit of advice is: get them to do the worst jobs, antifouling, going up the mast, greasing things, servicing the engine, and even cleaning the heads. It's amazing what pride it gives them to achieve something quite small.

 

[Laurin]

Reading all of this, and so many offspring not liking sailing, I'm starting to get a little concerned about our new crew..... it is essential that he doesn't grow to hate sailing!!!

It's hard to tell from the posts above, but I'd be interested to know if there if kids are more likely to enjoy sailing if BOTH parents are enthusiastic about being afloat. Any comments?

 

[eastcoastbernie]

Both me and my ex husband were keen sailors. Neither of us were into football, which was what both my sons were fanatical about.